El Zilcho

Aw, I'm disappointed. I was expecting this article to be about Joaquin Phoenix launching his rap career on SNL.

Still Phoenix is good.

on Phoenix Booked For SNL Next Week at March 26, 2009 9:48 AM
Score = 9

I've never seen somebody wear that much denim.

on Kanye Does That Thing He Does That Resembles Singing On American Idol at March 12, 2009 10:39 AM
Score = 12

O.J. was amazing... at football. But being good at running behind a stellar offensive line doesn't give a person a lifetime pass.

Kanye, you crazy.

on Thom Yorke, Chris Brown, O.J. Comments Cut From Kanye Storytellers at February 27, 2009 8:28 AM
Score = 9

I think there's some sort of loophole. It's the reason StubHub is still around, also.

In reply to thumbs's comment on Ticketmaster Has Always Sucked, But For Some Reason People Are Shocked By This Springsteen Fiasco at February 5, 2009 4:30 PM
Score = -1

Ugh, the "We're Gonna Let You Use Your Own Paper" charge is the worst.

In reply to TalbainJ's comment on Ticketmaster Has Always Sucked, But For Some Reason People Are Shocked By This Springsteen Fiasco at February 5, 2009 4:29 PM
Score = 12

I just did a rundown of most of the Boston venues I frequent. All of 'em use Ticketmaster, except the Paradise. They use Live Nation!

In reply to plumpy's comment on Ticketmaster Has Always Sucked, But For Some Reason People Are Shocked By This Springsteen Fiasco at February 5, 2009 4:28 PM
Score = 5

You need that precious panther ambergris. It's a key ingredient of Sex Panther.

In reply to Sean Jean's comment on Radiohead's Phil Selway, In Singer-Songwriter Mode For "The Ties That Bind Us" at January 7, 2009 4:04 PM
Score = 6

Some Doctor Who fan is going to be disappointed when he gets home with his Cyber Man costume, and it isn't an evil robot.

Also, it looks like Green Man has more competition now, from Green Guy.

on The 15 Funniest Knockoff Halloween Costumes at October 28, 2009 2:58 PM
Score = 3

"*grunting*" - Tim Allen

on NSFW: Name That Catch/Cumphrase at June 18, 2009 12:41 PM
Score = -13

Aw, I still kind of like the Doors, but not as much as I used to. Still, this sounds like it could be a lost Doors tune. A lot of Al's style parodies hit the mark so well, that you can almost think they're by the original artist.

In reply to Friendly Giant's comment on Weird Al Don't Ever Die at June 17, 2009 9:13 AM
Score = 2

YouTube might do it quicker, but Al still does it best. This parody is pitch-perfect.

In reply to Kit's comment on Weird Al Don't Ever Die at June 17, 2009 9:12 AM
Score = 4

That commercial reminds me of Bijou seductively eating a slice of pizza on 30 Rock last night.

on Padma Lakshmi Wants To Do It With A Hardee's Sandwich at March 27, 2009 12:16 PM
Score = 5

This is the first time I've seen someone call Crank bad. Crank is a giant explosion of fun.

on The Hunt For The Worst Movie Of All Time: Like Walking In Sand Made Of Tears, Tear Sand at March 20, 2009 12:18 PM
Score = 0

Yep, I second the nomination for Jones. It'd be an inspirational story. A young inner-city kid falls into the gang life, but manages to get out when he buys a warehouse for a dollar.

In reply to Max's comment on The Ultimate Argument Settler: 8 Local Commercials That Should Be Turned Into Movies at March 12, 2009 10:27 AM
Score = 0

Tyler Perry's Madea Eats Some Good BBQ

In reply to Owara Jacksohn's comment on The Ultimate Argument Settler: 8 Local Commercials That Should Be Turned Into Movies at March 12, 2009 10:26 AM
Score = 2

People are going to call the phone sex line because they aren't paying attention, and assuming they're all sequential. PAY ATTENTION MIDDLE AMERICA! Otherwise you have to talk to nasty girls.

on Oh Phew, The American Idol Non-Emergency Is Over at March 10, 2009 4:44 PM
Score = 3

It's also for people who lose their houses after the economy fails and have to live in their cars.

"The Stinger - Almost as much a condo as a car!"

Sad.

In reply to WeFlewAirplanes's comment on Remember When The Future Was Going To Be About Using Tools On The Beach? at February 24, 2009 4:43 PM
Score = 3