sparky

I just saw the movie, and here's the weird thing: One of those screengrabs is wrong. I don't know if they changed the fonts for the US version or what, but in the print I just saw, Port Au Prince didn't have that bad '80s reggae album-cover font -- it's rendered in large block capitals in an scratched-up, old-fashioned ornate font. (I can't name the font -- I'm no graphic designer -- but if I had to sum it up in three words, it would be "Faded Circus Poster".)

on How Many Shitty Meetings Did They Have About Those Quantum Of Solace Fonts? at November 24, 2008 12:15 AM
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Yes, Nicholas D'Agosto was fine on "The Office" but that's only because he only seldom spoke more than three words consecutively. To understand why he shouldn't be starring in anything, ever, try and find a clip of his recurring role on "Heroes". To be fair, it was "Heroes", which means that he was given wooden dialogue and an unplayable character (a badass kid who can fly whose name was -- wait for it -- "West Rosen".) But he still seemed especially wooden and unconvincing. Put it this way: His line readings were so awful, he made Hayden Panettiere look good.

on Fired Up Is So Many Other Movies It Will Blow Your Mind at November 19, 2008 1:12 PM
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I dunno -- much though I'd like to believe it, this sounds like a British-tabloid invention. I'm guessing that BA showed the pan-and-scan version of the movie, which (in all likelihood) crops out Branson simply because he's at the far-right side of the frame, as far from the action as possible. And the article seems carefully written so that it never quite says that BA confirms they deliberately took Branson out of the movie -- it just cites a representative saying that "changes had been made" and then quotes him talking about the usual airline content-editing guidelines. (Although I'm not sure how they edited around the whole "Daniel Craig gets stripped naked and then hit in the balls repeatedly" scene.)

I have no proof for any of this.

on Will Sir Richard Branson Buy Himself A Cameo In Quantum Of Solace? at November 13, 2008 10:57 AM
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Hysterical, although I was sure that you were going to edit in Elisabeth Rohm, from her final scene on "Law & Order", asking, "Is it because I'm a lesbian?"

on Grey's Anatomy: Dr. Erica Hahn's Alternate Ending at November 10, 2008 3:45 PM
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"The Third Miracle" -- an actual theatrical release from 1999. Ed Harris is sent by the Vatican to find out whether Anne Heche's dead mom is worthy of sainthood. Unremittingly awful, with one wrong decision after another. (To choose but one example: In the climactic scene -- SPOILER ALERT! -- Anne Heche watches a home video of her mom, taken in 1970. To repeat: She watches a HOME VIDEO of her mom, taken in 1970. You know. With one of those 8-track camcorders that were widely available in 1970.)

Also: "A Time to Kill". Also: "Contact". Also: Anything else made during that mid-90's period when people thought Matthew McConaughey could act.

on The Hunt For The Worst Movie Of All Time: What Doesn't Kill You Almost Kills You at November 1, 2008 3:30 PM
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