The Hills ended last Sunday with a one hour finale in which Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt were married, Lauren Conrad "quit" her "job," and Kristen Cavallari showed up as if somehow we were supposed…   Read Story »

Spencer has changed. Says Spencer. He has breakfast with Heidi's long suffering mom, Darlene, and explains that he's been going to therapy. He's already done the early-20's "sleazy guy thing," he…   Read Story »

Heidi is getting married. To Spencer. Our great national nightmare is almost at its end, just as the long, personal nightmare of the Pratts enters a new phase. Spencer has won the approval of Heidi's…   Read Story »

Even if you pretend that the characters on The Hills are actual human beings, and that as such they inherently have some kind of value on this Earth (God didn't make no junk, SUPPOSEDLY), there is…   Read Story »

This week's The Hills poses a very serious problem. Lauren goes on vacation to Italy (vacation from what, exactly?), at which point drama ensues! Can you believe all this drama that's ensuing while…   Read Story »

Whoops, I totally forgot. In my Hills recap today I gave a prediction of what would happen to the cast members as they got older. LC is clearly on the downward path to becoming a bitter Margo…   Read Story »