The Savannah, Georgia, police department had to remind citizens this week that 911 is for emergencies only and that misuse of the system is a misdemeanor offense after a woman called them to complain…   Read Story »

It would figure that Australia would have its own Nick Madson since it is an island of THIEVES! (Are we still doing that? I know it's 2011, but we're still making broad, mildly-insulting…   Read Story »

After applying to trademark the name "Seal Team 6" (which is the name of the squad of commandos who killed Osama Bin Laden), the Disney corporation has withdrawn that application after the UNITED…   Read Story »

Holy moly! Want my advice? Deposit this one in your Roth LOLk account immediately, because as soon as Glenn Beck rests his case, the value is going to go TO THE MOON ALICE! Unbelievable. Glenn Beck's…   Read Story »

Despite this (kind of) surprising turn of events, I think we can all still agree that this continues to be a very cool thing that is happening between two very cool people.   Read Story »

Last night, Lindsay Lohan made a "surprise" appearance on The Jay Leno Show to talk about her most recent incarceration and all of her legal troubles in general and also to talk about the 10,000…   Read Story »

"So, Lindsay Lohan's been in the news lately." That was a bit from my new topical stand-up comedy routine. Imagine me saying that but also with the sound of shuffling newspapers. LADIES AND GERMS.…   Read Story »

Antoine Dodson was arrested over the weekend on charges of marijuana possession, and Lindsay Lohan was sentenced to 120 days in jail. Smooth criminals or THE SMOOTHEST criminals?! Stay in school, you…   Read Story »

Fair enough. Sorry, gurrrl!   Read Story »

As you may know, the next season of Jersey Shore will be filmed in Italy, which, well, right. When the first season of this show aired, some people complained that it portrayed Italian-Americans in a…   Read Story »