What up, heroes in a half-shell! Dudes and girl dudes, you're probably feeling pretty invincible right now. You're young! You have your whole life ahead of you! What could possibly happen? Well let me tell you a snap: you're not... CONTINUE READING VIDEOGUM'S TEEN KORNER: DREAMBOAT VAMPIRES ONLY DRIVE VOLVOS»
Posted on November 3, 2009 in ,
(54 comments)
Tags: New Moon | Twilight | Vampires | Volvo
It's Monday morning, I haven't even had breakfast, and already my mind is blown? So it's going to be one of THOSE weeks. It's probably a good thing, though, that I haven't eaten anything yet today, you know? This... CONTINUE READING KEANU REEVES = CHARLEMAGNE (BECAUSE: LOGIC)»
Posted on November 2, 2009 in
(42 comments)
Tags: Charlemagne | History | Immortality | Keanu Reeves | LOLk | The Decemberists | The Truth Is Out There | Vampires
"I'm a 37-year-old woman, and I work in marketing for a small research firm. I used to live with my long-term boyfriend, and I really thought he was 'the one,' you know, but it just didn't work out. I'm OK!... CONTINUE READING ROBERT PATTINSON UNDERWEAR, LADIES (YOU'RE GROSS, LADIES)»
Posted on October 29, 2009 in
(67 comments)
Tags: Robert Pattinson | Twilight | Underwear | Vampires | Yuck
LA Gear! Listen, fresh dudes who respect girls and want everyone to be treated equally, and proud young women who know that they are in charge of their own destinies (which could even include being the first female president some... CONTINUE READING VIDEOGUM'S TEEN KORNER: COOL VAMPIRES AND WEREWOLVES ONLY DRINK VITAMIN WATER»
Posted on October 28, 2009 in ,
(33 comments)
Tags: LOLk | New Moon | Teenagers | Twilight | Vampires | Vitamin Water | Werewolves
The above image (via GetThaL@@k) is a vampire sex toy into which you are supposed to put your penis (I think? I have no idea, mom, I'm just kidding.) It is also the headstone on the grave of the... CONTINUE READING THE VAMPIRE THING NEEDS TO END RIGHT NOW»
Posted on October 27, 2009 in
(64 comments)
Tags: Dildos | Sex | Twilight | Vampires | Werewolves | Yuck
Gettin' Jiggy with it! OMG, u guyz. There should be some kind of SEXTING shorthand for the feeling you get when you realize that all of these years of being crazy in love with vampires have been a mistake when... CONTINUE READING VIDEOGUM'S TEEN KORNER: WEREWOLVES ARE THE NEW VAMPIRES ARE THE CUTEST!»
Posted on October 20, 2009 in
(44 comments)
Tags: Arctic Monkeys | Kristen Stewart | New Moon | OMG | Taylor Lautner | Twilight | Vampires | Werewolves
You know, now that it's over, I think I'm actually going to miss this show. It is terrible, yes, and completely coconuts, and the rules change from one episode to the next. But, it kind of grew on me, like... CONTINUE READING TRUE BLOOD: SEASON 2 FINALE»
Posted on September 14, 2009 in
(32 comments)
Tags: Alan Ball | Anna Paquin | Stephen Moyer | True Blood | Vampires
Here's the new New Moon trailer that premiered during the MTV Video Music Awards last night, you guys: Ha! So many teenagers were probably taken to the hospital last night when their hearts exploded. I will admit that this looks... CONTINUE READING AHHHHHHHHH, NEW NEW MOON TRAILER! CHRISTMAS IN SEPTEMBER!»
Posted on September 14, 2009 in
(45 comments)
Tags: Kristen Stewart | New Moon | Robert Pattinson | Taylor Lautner | Twilight | Vampires | Werewolves
It's like they always say, if you love something, set it corn maze.... CONTINUE READING TWILIGHT CORN MAZE»
Posted on September 8, 2009 in
(11 comments)
Tags: Corn Maze | Twilight | Vampires
As you may have heard, True Blood's ratings this season have been through the roof. Like, 20% increases from one week to the next? That is nuts. America is LOVIN' IT. It kind of makes you wonder who's watching this... CONTINUE READING LINDSAY LOHAN IS AMERICA'S #1 TRUE BLOOD SUPERFAN, NATURALLY»
Posted on September 1, 2009 in
(26 comments)
Tags: Lindsay Lohan | True Blood | Vampires
"HELLOOOOOO?! Is it November yet? I am dying over here. Last night my mom was like "why are you crying?" and I was like "New Moon doesn't come out for weeks and GET OUT OF MY ROOM. Didn't you see... CONTINUE READING VIDEOGUM'S TEEN KORNER: FACE-MELTING NEW STILLS FROM TWILIGHT: NEW MOON»
Posted on September 1, 2009 in ,
(60 comments)
Tags: Dakota Fanning | Kristen Stewart | New Moon | Robert Pattinson | Taylor Lautner | Twilight | Vampires | Werewolves
Vampire Bill goes to see the Vampire Queen, who is played by Evan Rachel Wood. She is either a terrible actress, or a great actress who is using all of her talent to match the tone of this terrible show.... CONTINUE READING TRUE BLOOD: THIS SHOW WOULD BE OFF THE RAILS, IF IT'D HAD ANY IN THE FIRST PLACE»
Posted on August 31, 2009 in
(35 comments)
Tags: Alan Ball | Anna Paquin | Stephen Moyer | True Blood | Vampires
Forks, Washington, is where Stephanie Meyers's Twilight series is set. Fair enough. It has to be set somewhere, and since Narnia was already taken, Forks is as good a place as any, I suppose. But Forks needs to relax. It's... CONTINUE READING RELAX, FORKS, WASHINGTON»
Posted on August 26, 2009 in
(45 comments)
Tags: Forks, Washington | Stephanie Meyer | Twilight | Twilight In Forks | Vampires
At a certain point this season, I was momentarily won over by this show. I'm not afraid to admit that. It was just as ridiculous as always, but there was something endearing in how bad it was. You wanted to... CONTINUE READING TRUE BLOOD: STICK A FORK IN THIS, IT'S DUMB»
Posted on August 24, 2009 in
(34 comments)
Tags: Alan Ball | Anna Paquin | Emmys | Stephen Moyer | True Blood | Vampires
CLIFFHANGER! At the end of last week's episode, Jason Stackhouse's former friend/rival from the Fellowship of the Sun, Duke? Brady? Troy? storms into the mid-century modern Dallas "hive" and reveals himself to be strapped with explosives and also fine jewelry.... CONTINUE READING TRUE BLOOD: POOR VAMPIRES, BOO HOO, SO SAD»
Posted on August 17, 2009 in
(40 comments)
Tags: Alan Ball | Anna Paquin | of Montreal | Stephen Moyer | True Blood | Vampires
Twilight Barbies, you guys. The thing is, this is the first facet of the Twilight phenomenon in awhile that actually makes sense. Twilight cruise? Twilight prom? These are insane things. Dolls? For little girls? OK! I do think that this... CONTINUE READING TWILIGHT BARBIES ARE A USEFUL REMINDER THAT TWILIGHT IS FOR CHILDREN»
Posted on August 11, 2009 in
(47 comments)
Tags: Barbie | Kristen Stewart | Robert Pattinson | Toys | Twilight | Vampires
At one point in last night's episode, Marianne uses her blood sugar sex magic to make Tara and Eggs (haha! Eggs!) devour a "hunter's souffle," that was made with Daphne's heart. Yuck, but OK. Then she makes Tara and Eggs... CONTINUE READING TRUE BLOOD: A BULL IN A DRESS WITH CLAWS»
Posted on August 10, 2009 in
(61 comments)
Tags: Alan Ball | Anna Paquin | Stephen Moyer | True Blood | Vampires
Dear the Twilight phenomenon, As a 69-year-old man, I continue to be completely ignorant of what you're actually about. I mean, I know that you're about adolescent vampires, and I know that at some point you're also about adolescent CGI... CONTINUE READING AN OPEN LETTER OF THANKS TO THE TWILIGHT PHENOMENON»
Posted on August 4, 2009 in
(47 comments)
Tags: Fashion | Twilight | Vampires
Sam is about to get MURDERED! He stumbled into the wrong bacchanalian field orgy. Marianne puts on her bull costume and asks for the ceremonial murderin' knife, which is handed to her on a platter, as is the custom, and... CONTINUE READING TRUE BLOOD: THE BLEEDS HAVE BEGUN, INDEED»
Posted on August 3, 2009 in
(40 comments)
Tags: Alan Ball | Anna Paquin | Stephen Moyer | True Blood | Vampires
There is a new lady vampire. Perfect. One thing that this show has been sorely lacking is an over-abundance of characters and too few plotlines. Vampire Eric called her to make her try and fuck Vampire Bill because Vampire Eric... CONTINUE READING TRUE BLOOD: SAME BLOOD, DIFFERENT DAY»
Posted on July 27, 2009 in
(25 comments)
Tags: Alan Ball | Anna Paquin | Eminem | Stephen Moyer | Tracy Morgan | True Blood | Vampires
Haha. Blade is always photobombing people. Whatever little champion made this already wins the Videogum Keys to the Internet. But surely we can make this even better (worse):... CONTINUE READING SPOILER ALERT: NEW MOON HAS A TWIST ENDING»
Posted on July 22, 2009 in
(25 comments)
Tags: Blade | Photobombs | Twilight | Vampires | Wesley Snipes
Daphne is a baby deer! Her and Sam start making out because JUNGLE FEVER. (There are a lot of puppies and tiny little deer in the jungle, you need to look that up.) But then they get interrupted by Terry... CONTINUE READING TRUE BLOOD: IT'S ONLY A MATTER OF TIME BEFORE THIS SHOW HAS A SWAMP THING»
Posted on July 20, 2009 in
(37 comments)
Tags: Alan Ball | Anna Paquin | Stephen Moyer | True Blood | Vampires
What's up crazy dudes and cool girls who like boys and clothes but also have informed opinions of their own and can be anything they want to in this world. Tony Hawk! If you're anything like us, you are going... CONTINUE READING VIDEOGUM'S TEEN KORNER: NEW MOON IN YOUR PANTS!»
Posted on July 17, 2009 in , ,
(32 comments)
Tags: New Moon | OMG | Teenagers | Twilight | Vampires | Werewolves
HELLO UPPER-EASTSIDERS, Just kidding. If you live on the Upper Eastside and you read this blog, thank you for reading and please give me a limousine! But I will not cater to you. The rest of us are down here... CONTINUE READING GOSSIP GIRL XOXO SUMMER NEWS XOXO ROUND-UP XOXO»
Posted on July 14, 2009 in
(26 comments)
Tags: Chace Crawford | Chuck Bass | Ed Westwick | Gossip Girl | Jenny Humphrey | Nate Archibald | Taylor Momsen | Vampires
LunaTwilight is a forthcoming line of Twilight cosmetics, duh, so that the nerds can look so pretty and dead while they brush their hair before falling asleep alone in a pile of cats.... CONTINUE READING ALL DRESSED UP LIKE TWLIGHT AND NOWHERE TO GO»
Posted on July 1, 2009 in
(7 comments)
Tags: Fashion | Nerds | Twilight | Vampires