Gossip Girl: Blood Is More Of An Asshole Than Water

It's time to read Bart Bass's will. Lilly won't be there because she is in Boston with Rufus trying to track down their secret monster adoption nightmare. But Chuck has asked Blair to go with him, and the mysterious new... CONTINUE READING GOSSIP GIRL: BLOOD IS MORE OF AN ASSHOLE THAN WATER»

Gossip Girl: Rufus Humphrey Is A Terrible Father

First things first: Aaron Rose is gone! Wait, isn't he Blair's stepbrother now? Shhhh! Don't spoil the Christmas Miracle with all of your pertinent questions. Gone. Serena broke up with him on the plane to Buenos Aires, which is classic... CONTINUE READING GOSSIP GIRL: RUFUS HUMPHREY IS A TERRIBLE FATHER»

Gossip Girl: One Weddings And A Funeral

[Ed. Note: better late.] So, Bart Bass is dead. OR IS HE? My friend Steven has floated the possibility that he's not dead (quote: i just don't believe someone is dead until i see the corpse and see someone pee... CONTINUE READING GOSSIP GIRL: ONE WEDDINGS AND A FUNERAL»

Someone Has Sent You A Present

It used to be that when you wanted to get a sense of a celebrity's personal life, you went to their house on trash day and dug through their garbage. Now, you just hack their Facebook account and read their... CONTINUE READING SOMEONE HAS SENT YOU A PRESENT»

Posted on December 5, 2008 in Behind The Scenes, WebJunk (1 comments)
Tags: Depeche Mode | Ed Westwick | Facebook | Gossip Girl

Gossip Girl: Dan And Serena Should Lose Their Suicide Virginity Together

Now that Thanksgiving is out of the way it's going to be a headlong rush through the holiday season and basically it's already 2009. But before we kiss 2008 goodbye forever, since this is such a forgettable year with absolutely... CONTINUE READING GOSSIP GIRL: DAN AND SERENA SHOULD LOSE THEIR SUICIDE VIRGINITY TOGETHER»

Gossip Girl: Be Thankful I Don't Talk About Serena And Aaron Rose

It's Thanksgiving! As the episode opens we're told that while for most people Thanksgiving is a holiday where families come together and give thanks, on the Upper East Side it returns to its roots of lying, manipulation, and betrayal. POLITICAL.... CONTINUE READING GOSSIP GIRL: BE THANKFUL I DON'T TALK ABOUT SERENA AND AARON ROSE»

Gossip Girl: Dan And Jenny Humphrey Are Two Garbage Peas In A Vomit Pod

When Jenny Humphrey ran away last week it was very exciting. Unlike throwing your sweet sixteen-and-a-half at 1Oak or stealing all of Bart Bass's Ferragamo loafers as a goof, teenagers running away from home can have very dire consequences. Maybe... CONTINUE READING GOSSIP GIRL: DAN AND JENNY HUMPHREY ARE TWO GARBAGE PEAS IN A VOMIT POD»

New Gossip Girl Posters Will Not Piss Off Your Parents

Remember the original ads for season 2 of Gossip Girl that showed two kids fucking Like Water for Chocolate style with a salacious quote like "Your Mom's Going To Barf," or "This Show Will Fuck Your Mouth"? Well there's a... CONTINUE READING NEW GOSSIP GIRL POSTERS WILL NOT PISS OFF YOUR PARENTS»

Gossip Girl: Jenny Humphrey Takes The Fashion World By Stupid

OK, so last week Jenny Humphrey quit her job with Eleanor Waldorf and decided to start her own fashion line, and as this week's episode opens Jenny is just putting the finishing touches on a final dress. What? I'm not... CONTINUE READING GOSSIP GIRL: JENNY HUMPHREY TAKES THE FASHION WORLD BY STUPID»

Gossip Girl: Blair Has An Itch That Only Chuck Can Have Sex With

We open this week on Blair masturbating. Haha. That sentence. We open this week on Blair masturbating. OK! Dorata, her maid, catches her and tells her that God is always watching. Um, shut up, Dorata. Considering the fact that this... CONTINUE READING GOSSIP GIRL: BLAIR HAS AN ITCH THAT ONLY CHUCK CAN HAVE SEX WITH»

You Can Make It Up: Chris Eigeman Meets Ed Westwick For Coffee

Chris Eigeman draped his blazer over the back of his chair and sat down at a table near the back of a Starbucks crowded with people working on their and catching up with friends. No one noticed him, although they... CONTINUE READING YOU CAN MAKE IT UP: CHRIS EIGEMAN MEETS ED WESTWICK FOR COFFEE»

Posted on October 23, 2008 in You Can Make It Up (7 comments)
Tags: Chris Eigeman | Ed Westwick | Starbucks

Did This Week's Fringe Predict The Future Of Chuck Bass?

I meant to write about this yesterday, but did anyone notice Chris Eigeman on this week's Fringe? He played an evil pharmaceutical CEO who is using humans as experimental weapons blah blah blah the pattern. He was a real patternhead.... CONTINUE READING DID THIS WEEK'S FRINGE PREDICT THE FUTURE OF CHUCK BASS?»

Posted on October 23, 2008 in Where Are They Now? (6 comments)
Tags: Chris Eigeman | Chuck Bass | Ed Westwick | Fringe | Future

Chuck Bass Has A Band

They're called The Filthy Youth. They sound like the Libertines. Here they are playing a song called "The Confidence" (via GoldenFiddle): I really hope they work this into an episode. Like, Serena runs into The Box to use the bathroom... CONTINUE READING CHUCK BASS HAS A BAND»

Posted on October 22, 2008 in Behind The Scenes, Music Related Content (6 comments)
Tags: Charlie Trout | Chuck Bass | Ed Westwick | Gossip Girl | The Filthy Youth

Gossip Girl: Serena Should Be Given Up For Adoption

Bart Bass is back from Billionaire Island or whatever, so it's time for the Basses and the Van Der Woodsens to become a family. Because Lilly and Bart got married last spring, and you know the rule about when both... CONTINUE READING GOSSIP GIRL: SERENA SHOULD BE GIVEN UP FOR ADOPTION»

Gossip Girl: Yale Ready For This

This week's episode opens with a dream sequence. It's basically My Fair Lady, with Blair as Eliza Doolittle taking diction lessons from Henry Higgins, who we will later recognize as the dean of Yale, and then Serena walks in and... CONTINUE READING GOSSIP GIRL: YALE READY FOR THIS»

Gossip Girl: Charlie Trout, Don Grumphrey, Clair Waldorn, And Selena Ban Der Foodsen Go To Fashion Week

It's Fashion Week! This is obviously a show about high school because the most important thing to remember is IT'S FASHION WEEK. I remember when I was in high school every fall it was like "Ugh, isn't western civ over... CONTINUE READING GOSSIP GIRL: CHARLIE TROUT, DON GRUMPHREY, CLAIR WALDORN, AND SELENA BAN DER FOODSEN GO TO FASHION WEEK»

Gossip Girl: Looks Like The Chuck Bass Has Become The Master

It's the first day back to school, so you know what that means! Actually, I thought I knew what that meant, but I clearly don't. Within the first five minutes of the show both Serena and Jenny Humphrey suggest to... CONTINUE READING GOSSIP GIRL: LOOKS LIKE THE CHUCK BASS HAS BECOME THE MASTER»

Gossip Girl: Our National Dan And Serena Nightmare Comes To An End

It's still summer in New York City, according to Gossip Girl. It's 102 degrees! Everyone is so sweaty! Things pick up where they left off last week. Nate is apologizing to Vanessa for standing her up last week but also... CONTINUE READING GOSSIP GIRL: OUR NATIONAL DAN AND SERENA NIGHTMARE COMES TO AN END»

Gossip Girl: With Parents Like These, Who Needs Children

Picking up where we left off last week, the children are all in the Hamptons, but summer is winding down and it's time to return to the big city. Dan and Serena wake up on a beach after fucking all... CONTINUE READING GOSSIP GIRL: WITH PARENTS LIKE THESE, WHO NEEDS CHILDREN»

Gossip Girl: And Here We...Go

Just in time! Last night, I watched the season 1 finale of Gossip Girl right before season 2 began. I did it! Success! I win/lose! So, after Dan broke up with Serena and Chuck left Blair waiting on the helipad... CONTINUE READING GOSSIP GIRL: AND HERE WE...GO»

The Cover Of The Gossip Girl Season 2 DVD Promo Screener Is The Funniest Thing

"Oh gosh, no, Chuck. I couldn't eat another piece. Not to mention the fact that i like my pie served on a plate. And I like to eat human-sized portions of pie. That piece of pie is as big as... CONTINUE READING THE COVER OF THE GOSSIP GIRL SEASON 2 DVD PROMO SCREENER IS THE FUNNIEST THING»

Posted on August 27, 2008 in Soap Operas, Wait For It... (6 comments)
Tags: Chuck Bass | Ed Westwick | Gossip Girl

Who Is The Most Popular Student At Constance Billard?

On the episode of Gossip Girl that I watched last night, little Jenny Humphrey stole a Valentino dress from that purse puppy Hazel in an effort to fit in and then found her whole upstairs-downstairs world crumbling around her when... CONTINUE READING WHO IS THE MOST POPULAR STUDENT AT CONSTANCE BILLARD?»

Chuck And Blair Are Probably Just Talking About Last Winter

There are thee leaked scenes from season 2 of Gossip Girl on the internet right now. I'm not watching them because as far as I'm concerned, it's still late winter at Constance. Can you believe Georgina is back? I wonder... CONTINUE READING CHUCK AND BLAIR ARE PROBABLY JUST TALKING ABOUT LAST WINTER»

Is Ed Westwick Austin Powers?

This weekend's Page Six magazine has an interview with Ed Westwick (via Just Jared). Did you know he was British? Of course you did. All 12-year-old girls know that. But did you also know that he talks like some kind... CONTINUE READING IS ED WESTWICK AUSTIN POWERS?»

Posted on August 22, 2008 in Interviews (2 comments)
Tags: Austin Powers | Coachella | Ed Westwick | Gossip Girl

Look At These Two Gay Guys Being So Gay

Even before I started working my way through the first season of Gossip Girl (I just finished the Christmas episode, and frankly I find it hard to believe that Serena would spend Christmas morning prancing around in a red negligee... CONTINUE READING LOOK AT THESE TWO GAY GUYS BEING SO GAY»