- Larry David looks different in this image from HBO’s new film Clear History. Kind of like Jon Hamm? Maybe it’s just me, but I think the face is kind of Jon Hammish. JK! I know which one is which. You can watch a teaser trailer for the movie, too! -EW
- Wack Wednesday came on Wack Monday this week — tell me about it — and you can now watch The Lonely Island’s new video for “Diaper Money”! Oh, great! -TheLonelyIsland
- Big news for your 2015 calendars: Michael Fassbender’s Assassin’s Creed, based on the video game series you have either probably watched people play or have played yourself, will be released in the summer of 2015. -/Film
- The Bling Ring made Paris Hilton cry. -NextMovie
- SPEAKING OF THE BLING RING, I can’t believe I haven’t mentioned this here before, but you can watch the entire season of Pretty Wild on Netflix Instant and I watched the whole thing and it is absolutely perfect. Please watch it. -Netflix
- Finally, we have our Celebrity Apprentice winner! Ugggh we’ve been waiting so long for this moment! -Zap2It
If it were any Saturday Night Live episode other than the season finale, during which we would say goodbye to Bill Hader, Fred Armisen, and possibly Jason Sudeikis, the fact that Ben Affleck seemed way-way nervous and way-way bad at reading cue cards, especially for a fifth-timer, would have been much more distracting. But who cares! GOODBYE, STEFON! HELLO, AMY POEHLER! WHY SO SERIOUS, KANYE, JUST KIDDING, PRETEND I DIDN’T ASK, YOU DO YOU! GOODBYE, IAN RUBBISH, I FEEL LIKE WE JUST MET! MUMBLE MUMBLE JASON SUDEIKIS MUMBLE! The evening was packed with ways to distract us from Affleck’s mediocre performance and sprinkled with sketches that would have been enjoyable even if it weren’t such a big night. Hader and Armisen’s sendoffs weren’t quite as plainly emotional as Kristen Wiig’s at the end of last season, but each were better for it — Hader’s seeing Stefon end up with his one true love, and Armisen’s seeing Armisen continue to half-live out his dream of being a musician through sketches. (Hello, J Mascis, Carrie Brownstein, Kim Gordon, Aimee Mann, and Steve Jones!) It was a good episode! Let’s look at some highlights.
On this Monday morning, as we watch Alexis Normand attempt to sing “The Star-Spangled Banner” at this weekend’s 2013 Memorial Cup Halifax-Portland hockey game, let us remember the moments in our life when we attempted to perform something unfamiliar in front of a crowd of thousands, and as we struggled, trying not to quit, those thousands, their eyes burning into our skin, were quick to loudly correct our missteps. Oh, you don’t have one of those times? UH, THEN MAYBE YOU SHOULD GIVE ALEXIS A BREAK! (Do not give Miguel a break though.) (MIGUEL!) (Thanks for the tip, Gideon!)
We did it. At the beginning of the week, back when we were talking about how Kristen Wiig did on Saturday Night Live (my memory is a little cloudy, but we all loved it except for the fact that we were hoping for more Gilly, correct?) (JK LOL), I thought we might never get here, but we’re here. #FRIDAY! The very beginning of what will end up being one weekend in an unending cycle of workweeks and weekends that will continue until either retirement or death. YAY! What are you going to do with yours? I’m hoping to go see Frances Ha. Who knows where the weekend will take me, but that is my hope. It looks good! Tell me what you’re going to do, and then let’s meet back here on Monday. Love you, bye!
After the jump, the five Highest Rated comments, as voted on by you, the Lowest Rated comment, the winner of the Amy’s Baking Company And Pizzeria Caption Contest, and Associate Editor’s Choice.
- Here is a realistic illustration of Toy Story’s Buzz Lightyear by Dan LuVisi. That is to say, Buzz Lightyear with a totally out of nowhere human face. LADIES! -LaughingSquid
- Courtney Stodden revealed, for whatever reason, that she DOES have a sex tape, but that she will never release it and it doesn’t exist on her computer. Okay, baby girl. You staty safe. -E!
- Amy Poehler is a wonderful angel of a woman on this week’s The Chris Gethard Show. You should watch it! Her skin and her hair glow the whole time. -TCGS
- Gothamist gathered up so many videos of Jared Leto busking in NYC. Do with them what you will. (Love them & marry them.) -Gothamist
- Last night, Jimmy Kimmel did an adorable The Baby Bachelor segment. This is like TREAT day or something. -Uproxx
- Want to see Zach Galifianakis and Ken Jeong do standup together in 1998? WELL TOO BAD. Just kidding, you can! -Buzzfeed
Ugh, can you imagine following either Jay Gatsby or Daisy Buchanan on Instagram? So many pictures of the green light/orange juice and so many pictures of herself, I bet. And when they’re together? Ugh. Only cute couple selfies. The worst, those two. ANYWAY LET’S LOOK AT SOME GIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIFS!
Remember what I said this morning about the Internet sometimes containing beautiful gems among the garbage? That goes for this as well. (Via BlameItOn.)
“Trailer, trailer, trailer, ooooh, like trailer, trailer, trailer, oooooh, like trailer, trailer, trailer, ooooh, I thought you’d always be mine.” – Gabe Delahaye. (Feat. Justin Bieber.) We have a couple for you today including a The Hangover for olds, so let’s get to them! WHILE WE’RE STILL YOUNGISH!