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Walter Kovacs
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Why won’t this person that we can easily ignore and yet we keep dedicating posts to shut up?!?!?! I bet by talking about it more it will convince other people to stop talking about it and then he’ll stop talking about it. Because logic.
Wheeling in mirrors is the ultimate in lo fi.
It’s one of those nice “the day is done” post, like the Monster’s Ball on Friday, or Hunt, or You Can Make It Up. Even if any of those regular features aren’t someone’s cup of tea, it’s a nice way of knowing “Ok, that’s the last post until tommorow”.
First you create amazing technology. Then you make a movie with it. Then you make a ton of money off that movie. Only then, with all that free time and money, can you sit down and write the script.
Running this thing is a great idea. Either you get 5 dollars a month for life for “expenses” while you have a ton of money you can use at some point when people stop paying you. And if the Rapture does happen, you have addresses of everyone that’s gone. Crime spree here I come. Of course it wold be awkward for both parites if you go to pick up a pet to find out that while the person was right about the Rapture, they were wrong about being one of the people that would get picked.
Of course, sooner or later, they’ll get the seats small enough so most people have to buy 2, and then the fatties will have to buy 3. I’ve seen buses with more room to sit that quite a few planes. It’s nice of them to make the planes capable of holding smaller than average people to make it extra uncomfortable for everyone, but every extra person you can cram in, all the better.
The worst part though is the girl who apparently was spilling over into the empty seat that Kevin Smith was spilling over into … and so she should buy another seat to not inconvenience the person that was a seat away from her. And that was after the woman paid extra money to get the “business class” (first on the plane, first choice of seat).
And on the note of first class travel … that’s as first class as they get … they let you get on first, pick your own seat, and then they treat you rudely. Hell, in the whole story they kept ripping off Kevin Smith because their policy is YOU HAVE TO GET ON THE PLANE RIGHT NOW!
He’s asking for all people who are borderline cases to be treated with a bit more dignity. If they think you might be a little big, they might say something when you are buying your ticket, or checking in, or about to get on the plane. Instead they wait until you are already on the plane in your seat, and so you can’t really freak out about being told to leave. And the whole “our specific rule we tell you is about not being able to put down the arm rests but if you can put down the arm rests that isn’t good enough.”
While he may be being obnoxious about it, it seems like the people at that airport were being rude. Heck, not to be all seriousgum, but it’s nice to see the reset button hasn’t stopped us from hating on fatties.
I thought Anna Nicole Smith was dead? How is her show still on?
MTV – Where everything is a rare miss
Why abort when a tackle-miscarriage is so much cheaper?
As long as they aren’t being rapped-rapped about safe sex, because then they are doing it wrong.
Also, if we want someone to rap about safe sex, it should be Colby. He’s down with safe texting.
I guess I’m too late to post “who cares about Topher Grace” and get into the monster’s ball (albeit for lowest rated, but it’s still there)?
Dad’s find out about mems exclusively through forwarded e-mails several months after the fact or seeing it referenced on television which is often the death knell of the meme. Seeing as it was American Idol, and they actively tried to make it a meme, it was pretty much stillborn anyway.
This announcement (other than marking the exact date it occured) was rejected by Duh Magazine for being too obvious.
My only guess for the downvotes is that the spirit of the contest is to not get so specific as to actually name characters (especially stuff like Nightowl II and the like …) If he stuck to mostly just first names it may have been better. The idea isn’t just to “restate the plot of the film/TV show/etc”, but do so in the way where someone that is reading it won’t realize it’s a plot synopsis (or paraphrasing of a theme song that is itself a plot synopsis) until it’s too late. Mostly I’m just replying because of my user name though.
I assumed this was another astounding reenactment from the people that brought up the real animated story of Tiger Woods and Conan O’Brien. Although, that animation would have likely caused only more deaths.
Because hipocrasy
6 of one, half dozen of another. Either way, he no longer has a competition for host of the Tonight Show. Doesn’t mean he won’t be boring and stale … but now NBC doesn’t have a back up plan for when his ratings finally start dropping too low for comfort, which means he’ll be a lesser of two crap piles compared to an unproven talent.
He extended his shelf life by getting Conan out of NBC. Now, who do they have to replace Jay? Jimmy Fallon? Carson Daly? Someone that does a guest host spot when Jay isn’t available? NBC has no one in place to take over for Jay anymore … so he’s bought himself a lot of time until they do. With Conan, Letterman and Jimmy Kimmel all having shows in basically the same time slot (assuming Conan goes to Fox), they won’t be able to get them to replace Jay … so they would need to go with someone new, or one of the later night hosts. Ferguson is hilarious, but he has the Conan schtick of “I’m the late late night guy … no one cares what I do so I can do what I want” which wouldn’t translate an hour earlier, especially not on the sacred Tonigh Show (apparently). So, outside of Seinfeld or someone like him, no one would really be able to pull the same ratings as Jay … Conan probably would have given time, but now that he’s no longer there, Jay doesn’t really have anyone to worry about. Replacing him that is. He’ll have plenty to worry about in terms of beating him in the ratings.
It is a Sit-Com. That means situation comedy. Considering your reply indicates you don’t know either the situation or the characters involved in the situation, of course you are going to miss he joke. This point that this is a punchline without the setup. True, sitcoms are not standup acts or monologues … they are narratives. Showing only a small part of a complete story will have a significant impact on the comedy. The alternative is one of those Adult Swim programs with no narrative at all where it’s entirely made of non sequitors.
The “Joke” is mostly built around Sheldon’s character being obvlious to things outside of his own geeky areas of expertise. I don’t have the series memorized, but considering who is at the table he wasn’t asking to help the girl out. The “debate” referenced at the start of the clip is the set up for the joke. Likely, most humor, especially character based humor, stripped of all context, would leave it unfunny. It is not the laugh track being removed that makes this “lack of joke” fall flat … but the lack of any context to explain why it would be funny. A Conan O’Brien joke about “you can do anything you want … unless Jay Leno wants to do it too” would hardly be funny to someone that has no idea what is going on with the NBC line up. Similarly the second half of a scene from 30 Rock, only showing the “payoff” to a Liz Lemon is a loser “joke” wouldn’t be particularly funny to someone who saw only that clip without much knowledge of the show.
Twilight would be a million times better if the first book/movie/dildo/etc ended with the vampire becoming human and the girl dying. Because no sequels. And annoying girl dying.
So can we take a monologue, cut out the audience noise, and begin the joke halfway through so the set-up to the punchline is missing and make fun of say … Conan?
Without any clue as to the kind of character that Sheldon is, or why he’s even asking the guy those questions, the joke is bound to fall flat.
But look at me being all seriousgum over here.
Still, on the subject of laugh tracks, Fawlty Towers had the studio audience thing, but they were all, screw the live crowd, just keep talking. The laugh track isn’t just a crutch for bad comedy, it also pads out the story. There is a reason the Simpsons and Family Guy, etc, have to burn through a story in the first act and then have a completely unrelated one in the second act … without pausing for a laugh track they need to include at least 33% more stuff. But hey, maybe instead of a laugh track we can have 5 minutes of Conway Twitty.
This should convince those people that Pandora is not a World worth killing yourself because you can’t be a part of it. [Also, Jay can plug his USB hair into his vehicles ... which is his ultimate dream. To rape-rape cars.]
I have changed my avatar for the occaision.

















First, he actually mentioned the Haiti thing in the first video (mentioning how when asked about the Conan/Leno thing, he said the Haiti was more important, and so is this). As for the free money … he had already used 3 tickets on an earlier flight (for himself, his wife and her taint, but only he ended up going). He only wanted to use two, but the person he was dealing with printed out all three, and rushed him onto the plane so that if he wanted to get a refund for the ticket he didn’t need to use he’d have to go through a process after getting home. Later, he tried to get home early, and was on a packed flight. He still had two tickets (at premium prices that allow first choice of seats, etc). Because of that he had first dibs on standby, so he got the standby seat, but the plane would be packed, so he would only get one. They still took both his tickets, again rushing him onto the plane and telling him that he’d be able to deal wth it later. Then they took him off the plane almost as soon as he got in. So, after going through all of that, they offer him a 100 dollar gift voucher (which means … you can only spend it at this airline that has been repeatedly rude to you) and let him use the plan tickets he had already purchased to take a later flight.
The woman on that flght was treated with similar rudeness is also someone that spent the extra money to get “better treatment” like being first on the plane and having their choice of seat (in part as a courtesy to not be the “slow fat person” in front of other people. Both of the fatties had spent extra money to be courteous as well as to avoid embarassment. The extra cash spent would normally allow them to get in the plane, grab a window seat and if someone ended up sitting next to them, that would be their choice. In Smith’s case, he’d even buy an extra seat because HE didn’t want people sitting next to HIM, not because he was spilling onto them. And if that is how the company treats people who pay the premium for special treatment … how rude are they to the people paying just the normal fare?
One other thing people may not know, is that Southwest doesn’t assign seating like a normal airline does, so it’s like a greyhound bus basically, you sit where there is an available seat. So you only get stuck next to a fat person on a particularly full flight AND you are one of the last people on the plane.
But hey, he has money and people don’t like his movies, so he should just go on a diet. Because fat.