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“Victoria Jackson? I thought she had a pretty good gig. I just have a particular repulsion to grown women who talk like little girls. It’s like, ‘You’re a grown woman! Use your lower register!’ And she’s a born-again Christian. I don’t know. She was like from Mars to me. I never really got her.” — Jan Hooks <3
*AT the RNC. Sorry, Victoria Jackson moment.
He was bandleader the the RNC!
You win everything forever, THE END.
Hi Dish! Very good analysis!
A pleasure. Only one pleasure.
“Put your cum here and here, and initial here, and please print your name here, annnndddd cum on me here, here, and here. It’s been pleasure sexting business with you.”
No kissing? Phew!
PRO: Highest ratings ever in Europe.
CON: Women will not be allowed to tell jokes.
A blonde, beehived woman with chipmunk cheeks earnestly performs all the nominated songs.
The first hour will be hilarious, the second more serious and uneven, and the third will veer wildly between brilliance and junk.
John Waters, OBVIOUSLY. The jokes will actually be funny, movies that are actually good will be awarded, and it will not take itself so goddamned seriously.
(Fun fact: John Waters is a member of the Academy and votes on the Oscars. His sponsor for admission was David Lynch.)
Probably both? Childhood is confusing and the worst.
YES. That is an amazing movie and everyone should drop everything to see it right now. It was written and directed by the writer of The Player, so that should sweeten the pot.
When I saw her make that statement on Hannity, I thought it was awesome that Fox News brought out the Crypt Keeper to say some scary stuff for Halloween. They’re terrifying all the time, so it was especially impressive to see them top themselves for the holiday.
I’ll always have a warm place in my heart for Joy Behar because of a question she asked Fred Phelps’ estranged son about his father: “How old is he? Maybe he’ll die soon.”
I know! They totally copied Tom Cruise.
“If you gripped the sides of the cup with your thumb and forefinger, I would really appreciate it.” — Guy who has to clean the floor of the church.
“Hollywood actors are ridiculous assholes. Here’s one to tell you how to vote.” — Herman Cain
Mensa’s Rick Perry.
I’m in public so I can’t watch it now, but I’m imagining a Harpo/Lucy mirror scenario with KCC and Rumer Willis. I know it would creep me the fuck out.
Re: Steven Tyler biopic. If Angelina Jolie were in a terrible fire, she’d be perfect.
Well, I have now reached the age where I honestly can’t tell whether new pop songs are meant to be jokes or not. Put me on the ice floe kids, I’m done.
“Interiors” works also.