Profile 
king curtis
Website: -
Find Me On:

Latest Comments

Comments

 0Posted on May 24th | re: This Week In Movie Trailers, You Guys (27 comments)

 0Posted on May 24th | re: This Week In Movie Trailers, You Guys (27 comments)

Hi, Teach!

You must be the short depressed kid we ordered

 0Posted on May 17th | re: This Week In Comedy: The Office Series Finale (58 comments)

I laughed really hard when Nellie said, “I get what they’re doing, but why are the graves so shallow?” Also when Andy said, “Thanks, Dad. I mean, Daryl.”

 0Posted on May 17th | re: This Week In Comedy: The Office Series Finale (58 comments)

Yes! I was sitting there feeling all bittersweet and the TV was like “HANNIBAL STARTS RIGHT NOW!” and I was like, “NO, IT DOESN’T!”

 0Posted on May 16th | re: The Office Series Finale Drinking Game (21 comments)

Hey! Speaking of…am I the only one who thinks that first season Micheal Scott looks like a young version of Samy? (or vice versa)

Brown rice and grilled asparagus

 0Posted on May 15th | re: How Was Everyone's Day Today? (116 comments)

I rode my bike to work today and while I was at a red light, a drunk homeless guy came up and got in my face and was speaking gibberish but then asked if I wanted some beer and pulled a 40 out of his coat and when I said no thanks he pretended to smash it over my head, but here’s the thing…. he had the most beautiful eyes I’ve ever seen!

 0Posted on May 10th | re: This Week In Movie Trailers, You Guys (31 comments)

I was getting ready to watch The Walking Dead a couple months ago and this girl texted me and she was like, “What are you doing?” and I was all, “I’m about to watch Walking Dead!!!!!!” and she goes, “I hear 27 people are supposed to die on there tonight” and I was like, “WTF?!?!” and she was like, “What?” so I was like, “Spoiler alert, yo!” and she said, “Oh, really? But it’s all over the internets.” At this point I stopped texting, but she kept going with stuff like, “I thought you read the comics” and “I assumed they meant zombies”. Anyway, I guess the thing I hate most about people who spoil stuff is when you call them on it and they refuse to apologize. They’re always like, “What? Who me? I didn’t do nothing. Let me explain why it’s not a spoiler.” GRRRRR!

 0Posted on May 8th | re: Sarah Dunne's "Mwah" Music Video (19 comments)

you beat me (sniff)

 0Posted on May 3rd | re: This Week In Comedy Open Thread (36 comments)

 0Posted on Apr 24th | re: How Was Everyone's Day Today? (98 comments)

I woke up late, ate a pot candy and was working for a bit, but then that Zach Braf kickstarter thing happened and I got really distracted. Please bring back WMOAT!

 0Posted on Mar 29th | re: Monsters' Ball: The Week's Top Comments (69 comments)

Don’t forget about my scrotum!

 0Posted on Mar 29th | re: Monsters' Ball: The Week's Top Comments (69 comments)

Thanks!

 0Posted on Mar 29th | re: Monsters' Ball: The Week's Top Comments (69 comments)

I hope you’re not hoping too much!

King Curtis: You don’t have to say, “You better put yogurt in my parfait now or I’m getting the fly swatter” ….you don’t have to be that mean, you can be nice…or you can leave…my house.

Holden: You’re in a dessert aisle, walking along, when all of a sudden…
Leon: Is this the test now?
Holden: Yes. You’re in a dessert aisle, walking along and all of a sudden you look down and…
Leon: What one?
Holden: What?
Leon: What dessert aisle?
Holden: It doesn’t make any difference what dessert aisle. It’s completely hypothetical.
Leon: Well, how come I’d be there?
Holden: Maybe you’re fed up, maybe you wanna eat dessert, Who knows. You look down and you see a parfait, Leon.
Leon: Parfait? What’s that?
Holden: You know what yogurt is? Same thing.

 0Posted on Mar 21st | re: A Think Piece About Think Pieces (67 comments)

I only like think pieces where Kelly indirectly talks about me playing saxophone in the bathtub.

Well, let’s not start sucking each other’s thumbs quite yet.