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CalypsoFacto
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Can you Monsters keep a secret? I have a huge crush on Stephen Merchant. Gangly, beardy, glasses, accent? SIGN ME UP.
The comments on that AOL story are making me 
all over the place. They ruined my Jeffdunhamiscancelledwoot! glow-basking.
So very humbly I once again nominate VALKYRIE. SO HARD. Tom Cruise is a nazi! Do it Gabe.
And Gangs of New York, even though I know I’ll get downvoted. “I am a dooly appointed guy from the streets of lower Maaahnattan.”
But WHEN is the self-absorbed pseudo-parenting?
I cannot endorse this, simply because FEAR was known in my high school as “The movie where that girl gets her cherry popped on a rollercoaster.” How can that be the worst movie of all time?
(It can, but still, memories.)
I will once again nominate Valkyrie, and I am seconding so hard Million Dollar Baby.
Oh man, McNulty’s gasps are priceless. I think he used that same gasp as he was accidentally fucking that prostitute in s2. It’s called the Method, guys.
Also, I cannot recommend Valkyrie enough for the hunt. Go back in time and Kill Hitler and then go a little further ahead in time but not all the way and give Bryan Singer all the money not to listen to Tom Cruise when he asks for script approval.
Joe Francis looks sexy in that picture. Downvote away!
Hmmm. I’m oddly attracted to Aziz in this clip. It’s a new day.
Speaking of going back in time and KILLING HITLER, I am gonna go ahead and nominate VALKYRIE for the next round. Oh man, you guys. Tom Cruise is a good Nazi! Bryan Singer is involved for some reason! It’s boring, but also poorly acted, but also Tom Wilkenson is sort of good, which makes you yearn for something better that might have been!
Skins is one of my favorite shows, I’m trying to get everyone to watch it. It’s not like Gossip Girl–the characters are interesting, the story telling is imaginative, and they actually fuck. Let’s paint, exercise, and watch Skins everyone!
This could have merited a “That’s your boyfriend” tag so easily…sigh…my boyfriend has scary primate lips and beat box wars with a traveling hipster while sitting on a porch swing. I guess we don’t have to overdo it, though–there are so many boyfriends on this great Earth of ours.
So wait, Boston Legal has been canceled right? And so has Monk? So this is the last year we have to suffer through that garbage? Yay.
If I have to see a movie like this (I do not have to see a movie like this), I would much rather someone just adapt Kirstie Alley’s Twitter feed.
I’ll do it, if nobody else is gonna man up.
“But WHEN is the lawsuit?”
“We have to get back to the lawsuit!”
“Jack, never ask me what I did with the lawsuit.”
Etc.
I don’t think it’s a spoiler alert if the movie comes pre-spoiled.
Did Sebastian use his Sexual Boxcarchild skills to decorate a Christmas tree with the anxious post-coital tears of a 14 year old girl?
For your consideration:
Boat Trip
Dungeons and Dragons
America’s Sweethearts
Shallow Hal
The Other Sister
Girl, Interrupted
It’s the blaming Gabe that made me internet yell. Gabe has no control over which ads go up on this site. He is not “fucking selling out,” he is writing a post. Apparently, Gabe is my boyfriend and I need to get all chivalrous about this.
Yeah, Gabe, WHY DID YOU CHOOSE THE ADS THAT GO ON THIS SITE, SINCE THAT IS CLEARLY WHAT ALL EDITORIAL EMPLOYEES ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR. Show yourself.
I did not see this before I posted my secret SM crush. Let’s start a Stephen Merchant Angelfire website together!