Just goes to show you: Rob Thomas is a whore.
Whatever happened to trolling the docks at midnight? That was good enough for my parents and it’s good enough for me.
A mature and nuanced appreciation for how your own perspective can change, as well as the ability to recognize the unalterable existence of some amount of solipsism in all of us, is certainly attractive to most ladies. Also, not parting your hair down the middle like a weenis helps.
Pass the Uncle Buck
Not Without My Slaughter
This is America, we speek American here!
Triggy Triggy Bang Bang
Dae-su just chilling around the apartment in his FoLaz… missing work, catching some ZZs.
For 30 bucks they better throw in a handie. HEYOO.
“Stony silence in response”
-Angelina, Shiloh, and probably at least one more of the other kids, if we’re being honest
When he pretended that the guitar was his junk, it made me ashamed for anyone who has ever had junk. Or a guitar. Or played pretend. Or wore jeans.
That colossal whooshing you hear is the sound of every person on earth hanging their head in shame at the same time.
Yeah, in the biblical sense.
I saw a video titled “Michael Caine Does Michael Caine” on Buzzfeed earlier, and I’m not ashamed to admit that my best case scenario for what would be in it was NOT voice acting.
And Pinto Gabe became famous because his especially skillful eating was refused by Frieda Pinto.
This is more appropriate to my plans for the next few weeks.
And I’d just like to add that in my first year here I have really enjoying giving and receiving upvotes, and all of the rancor surrounding out-comment friendships lately has actually inspired me to try and get to know some of you out-comment. Y’all seem great.
Go for it. TP man, it’s the only way to fly.
Aww, don’t worry, I can assure you that will never happen. Most bars don’t even serve Shirley Temples anymore.
I will have to ruminant on it, but I think that’s the best use of the word bezoar I’ve ever seen.
In my defense Notsewfast, I was pretty busy with my hooker for about three minutes.
This is a really bad part of town. With Red Shoe Dr on the south side and Californi Ct on the north, it’s absolutely lousy with hookers.
I’ll leave it to you to figure out whether my favorite whiskey drink is mixed or not.
Whiskey Sour Vagina
I just tried it and it is indeed fun to put it in your mouth. Tiny gossamer little torn squares. It melts and flattens itself down onto your tongue like the best, fattest snowflakes you ever caught, and I had visions of closing my eyes and tilting my head back for on the first snowday of the year. It feels a little magical. And then suddenly it is all flattened and soggy and spittled and you realize you have toilet paper in your mouth and literally the last thing in the entire world you want to do is eat it (or anything ever again). So I spit it out.
Plus I think I found a staple in it.
I asked for a box of dookie every year and all I got was this lousy court-appointed guardian.