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March 4, 2009

These Mormon Pickup Lines Would Make The Pickup Artist Cry

Well, here's a real video of Mormon guys demonstrating their best pickup lines. The "You're a tall drink of water, and I'm thirsty!" one is kind of Mormon-filthy!:

Whoa, wait a second, this is from 2006 at the earliest. Was Clayton McDonald the Mormon inspiration for Chuck Bass? SCANDAL! Wanna hear my Mormon pickup line? Here it is: "I'm not wearing any special undergarments."

Posted by Lindsay at 12:15 PM in ,
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16 Comments

girl, I;d like to share with you the true meaning of being a missionary.

Posted by: pussy whiskers at 03/04/09 12:40 PM  | Reply
Score = 11 Vote up Vote down

I like the guy in the awesome tie at 1:07. It sort of seems like he wants to throw up at the thought of talking to a girl.

Posted by: Dorkus Malorkus profile link at 03/04/09 12:55 PM  | Reply
Score = 2 Vote up Vote down

Mormons believe in Santa?

Posted by: jacob666 profile link at 03/04/09 1:05 PM  | Reply
Score = 4 Vote up Vote down

No, you can't have my "pitcher."

Posted by: wubdub profile link at 03/04/09 1:15 PM  | Reply
Score = 4 Vote up Vote down

My favorite part is Jason Segel eating a Filet-O-Fish at the end. He doesn't even need pickup lines!

Posted by: BodyKarate profile link at 03/04/09 1:16 PM  | Reply
Score = 4 Vote up Vote down

Nice font!

Posted by: Sean at 03/04/09 1:26 PM  | Reply
Score = 2 Vote up Vote down

The best pick up line ever has to be: "You remind me of fast food because I want to take you out ... and then eat you in my car."

Posted by: MusclesMarinara at 03/04/09 1:40 PM  | Reply
Score = 6 Vote up Vote down

stella!

Posted by: shayne profile link  in reply to  MusclesMarinara 's comment at 03/04/09 2:42 PM  | Reply
Score = 1 Vote up Vote down

"i'm clayton mcdonald" works wonders for me

Posted by: chris profile link at 03/04/09 1:50 PM  | Reply
Score = 7 Vote up Vote down

That last guy was CLEARLY a character from Tim and Eric Awesome Show.

I wonder why there aren't more famous mormon actors. I mean, the "Do you believe in love at first sight", he must be at LEAST like Juliard trained, right?

Posted by: CarolineA profile link at 03/04/09 2:41 PM  | Reply
Score = 0 Vote up Vote down

Either my magical spectacles are malfunctioning or I've just seen an angel.

Posted by: TheRealMatt profile link at 03/04/09 3:37 PM  | Reply
Score = 2 Vote up Vote down

"and i'm looking for a good place to eat..." I thought that one was going to end horribly.

Posted by: sol at 03/04/09 6:22 PM  | Reply
Score = 3 Vote up Vote down

"Hi. Let's not waste time here, OK? Would you like to be first wife in my growing family and not get jealous when I'm boning the others?"

Posted by: Jetpacks at 03/05/09 11:51 AM  | Reply
Score = 1 Vote up Vote down

Heh. The Pretty Woman line is complete fail. Julia Roberts played a hooker in that movie.

Posted by: A.J. at 03/05/09 12:07 PM  | Reply
Score = 3 Vote up Vote down

OK. When the one guy mentioned Richard Gear, I started trying desperately to figure out how he could possibly use "gerbil" to complete a successful pick-up line.

Posted by: Sonicfrog at 03/05/09 12:20 PM  | Reply
Score = 1 Vote up Vote down

Nice. Even the gerbil one works.

Posted by: Pickup Lines at 07/26/09 10:33 PM  | Reply
Score = 0 Vote up Vote down

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