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March 5, 2009

The Breakfast Song Is The Bestfest Song

As I have mentioned before, there is nothing funnier than a list of "all the examples." But when you combine a list of "all the examples" with a song about what kinds of breakfast you won't need when you go to heaven, you are basically a human Microsoft Songsmith, crafting the most scientifically perfect music on Earth. (Via Dlisted)

That being said, some of us are still alive, so you know what that means. It's time for some beef stew and a big bowl of Nuts of Grape! (Pause.)

Posted by Gabe at 10:00 AM in
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19 Comments

:( No more lucky charms?

Posted by: bryan at 03/05/09 10:18 AM  | Reply
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Does anyone know if I can book the Invisible Revival Band for a wedding and/or bar mitzvah?

Posted by: Ginger Ball Z profile link at 03/05/09 10:32 AM  | Reply
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Light bread?

Posted by: oh. at 03/05/09 10:35 AM  | Reply
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I hadn't checked the length, and at 2:10 was sure it was about to end.
How wrong I was.

Posted by: bryan profile link at 03/05/09 10:41 AM  | Reply
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you see? I know I'm not a lyricist, because I could have never thought of "pancakes" rhyming with "beef stakes". POETRY!
and I love you, videogum, but 1.40 minutes is enough for me.

Posted by: sol at 03/05/09 10:50 AM  | Reply
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This guy seems awfully confident that he's going to die before noon.

Posted by: Josh at 03/05/09 10:52 AM  | Reply
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this guy is doing a really poor job of selling me on heaven

Posted by: brody at 03/05/09 11:20 AM  | Reply
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i don't think that whole 'shall not live on bread alone' thing should have been taken this literally - but whatev - to each his own.

Posted by: Becca profile link at 03/05/09 11:22 AM  | Reply
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the look on his face at the end is as if he just crafted bohemian rhapsody. well done sir, well done.

Posted by: octavis at 03/05/09 12:01 PM  | Reply
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No mo' bacon, orange juice, or coffee?

Heaven sounds like kind of a drag.

Posted by: dafs profile link at 03/05/09 12:03 PM  | Reply
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Take a look at his teeth! Maybe if he drank less soda pop for breakfast hed have more than 4 teeth

Posted by: jason at 03/05/09 12:47 PM  | Reply
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"No mo' griiits" is the saddest line I have ever heard in a song.

Posted by: bingo gas station profile link at 03/05/09 1:01 PM  | Reply
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I was going to say the same thing. :(

Posted by: sarah  in reply to  bingo gas station's comment at 03/05/09 1:45 PM  | Reply
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The idea of eternity of heaven was always appealing to me. "No more pain, no more sadness, no more evil" and all of that wonderful stuff my dad would preach from the pulpit. But never once did he ever bring up the "No more breakfast" angle. Now I'm like FUCK YOU HEAVEN. Because, no more captain crunch? I'D RATHER BURN IN HELL.

Posted by: Y at 03/05/09 1:25 PM  | Reply
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exactly! i am to understand that heaven exists, and its a heaven without bacon or coffee?

Posted by: jackycakes profile link  in reply to  Y's comment at 03/09/09 7:53 PM  | Reply
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At least we get a Last Supper.

Posted by: Elliot profile link at 03/05/09 5:01 PM  | Reply
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this would probably more effective if they were mentioning the bad things that death might bring an end to.
no more head lice, no more hang nails, no more chimp maulings...

I'm hungry.

Posted by: C at 03/05/09 7:58 PM  | Reply
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I tihnk he meant "nuts or grains" (?)

Posted by: Wildcat at 03/09/09 2:31 AM  | Reply
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Maybe it's like that Twilight Zone episode and we're supposed to choose Hell over the Lucky Charms-free Heaven, and it turns out that's actually Hell.

Maybe.

Posted by: indybree profile link at 03/14/09 7:59 PM  | Reply
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