Videogum Home - designed by Guilherme Rosa

 

April 16, 2009

Cleveland Doesn't Rock, If You Will

The concept of Cleveland sucking is such a cliche (the ironic Drew Carey intro, that episode of 30 Rock, "Hello, Cleveland!", Cleveland actually sucking), that at this point it might seem played out. But this faux commercial from the "Cleveland Tourism Board" is somehow still totally funny:

As a native Floridian, I've earned a lifelong case of geographical schadenfreude, but, like, sorry Cleveland. (Thanks for the tip, Aileen!)

Posted by Lindsay at 12:30 PM in
Tags:




44 Comments

lizzing

wow. that was way better than i expected. so the big draw to cleveland is that people still use payphones?

Posted by: lizzing profile link at 04/16/09 12:34 PM | Reply
Score = 0 Vote up Vote down
caringiscool

obvs the draw is maybe seeing that guy.

Posted by: caringiscool profile link in reply to lizzing's comment at 04/22/09 9:32 PM | Reply
Score = 1 Vote up Vote down
Deezey

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. I like that kind of humor.

Posted by: Deezey profile link at 04/16/09 12:38 PM | Reply
Score = 6 Vote up Vote down
CarolineA

Arrow up on this video.

Posted by: CarolineA profile link at 04/16/09 12:39 PM | Reply
Score = 15 Vote up Vote down

Cleveland might suck, but Akron doesn't. Have you actually ever been to Cleveland? Please post your experiences there that give you the authority to make such a judgement. Thanks!

Posted by: Michael Quirk at 04/16/09 12:39 PM | Reply
Score = -18 Vote up Vote down
Angelaaaa

HAHAAHAHHA

Posted by: Angelaaaa profile link in reply to Michael Quirk's comment at 04/16/09 1:17 PM | Reply
Score = 6 Vote up Vote down

as a Cleveland native I will say this is all true. Very accurate depiction. I would laugh but it's too sad.

Posted by: E-Swag at 04/16/09 12:44 PM | Reply
Score = 8 Vote up Vote down
etc

I was going to suggest that someone make a Detroit tourism video, but that might be too :( to contemplate.

Posted by: etc profile link at 04/16/09 12:49 PM | Reply
Score = 16 Vote up Vote down
Calliwell

You know how there's a movie about the Haunting of Connecticut? I think there should be a slew of movies based on seemingly nonthreatening towns. Like The Cleveland Horror, Screams from Buffalo...Salt Lake Reign of Terror.

Posted by: Calliwell profile link at 04/16/09 12:52 PM | Reply
Score = 16 Vote up Vote down

The Abomination in Springfield? The Skinning of Des Moines? The Carson City Throwing-Up-In-the-Mouth-A-Little-Bit?

Posted by: Local Man at 04/16/09 1:02 PM | Reply
Score = 17 Vote up Vote down
Becca

i hope THIS GUY or DRIFTER doesn't see this video.
:( for them...

but otherwise - hilarious.
The Midwest IS depressing, but I fuckin love it!

Posted by: Becca profile link at 04/16/09 1:12 PM | Reply
Score = 3 Vote up Vote down
Bubbles

He's the guy who invented Cleveland!

Posted by: Bubbles profile link at 04/16/09 1:16 PM | Reply
Score = 5 Vote up Vote down

i wanted to be all "HEY YOU ARE ALL JERKS FOR LIKING THIS VIDEO," but then i watched it, and as much as i like cleveland... it's true. sigh.

Posted by: marah at 04/16/09 1:24 PM | Reply
Score = 2 Vote up Vote down

That was funny, and I hate Cleveland, so it works on two fronts.

Also, I hate Florida. WHERE'S MY FLORIDA VIDEO?!

Posted by: arthur great profile link at 04/16/09 1:43 PM | Reply
Score = 2 Vote up Vote down
Carrie

Jack: "It's so schadenfreude."
Liz: "No it isn't. That's not how you use that word."

Use discretion with German loanwords, please!

Posted by: Carrie profile link at 04/16/09 2:29 PM | Reply
Score = 6 Vote up Vote down
Ashley

Drifters still exist? And Cleveland has a bunch? I think I want to go to Cleveland now.

Posted by: Ashley profile link at 04/16/09 2:36 PM | Reply
Score = 5 Vote up Vote down

I grew up in Cleveland and, yes, it sucks. That's why I moved away. but still...

GO CAVS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! CAVS ALL THE WAY!

but seriously, no way any city tops Seattle in drifters.

Posted by: Joel at 04/16/09 2:41 PM | Reply
Score = 1 Vote up Vote down

wow a lot of Clevelanders reading videogum - me too!
Cleveland has the distinction of repelling hipsters therefore it is the coolest place in the states.
I live in Portland now which sucks in comparison - but the weather is nicer.

Um, and the Drew Carey intro is actually not ironic.
The Rock and Roll Hall of Fame is there, as the term was coined there. It's a depressed steel town and (rock) music is important to people. Mostly it's classic rock style crap, but there is also a strong punk and house/techno scene.
It's a short drive to NY/Philly/Pittsburgh/Detroit/Chicago. You can rent a nice house for cheap, and people are nice there as well.
Growing up there in the 70's & 80's, I went to quality affordable all ages shows several times a week, at the Phantasy, in the Flats, in basements.

But yeah this video does capture a certain side of it. These shots were all taken within the same area of downtown. Looks like a high school made video though;
I doubt it is really a "Cleveland tourism board" video.

Posted by: ronton profile link at 04/16/09 3:30 PM | Reply
Score = -21 Vote up Vote down
Mcluskyist

Obviously, that's why Lindsay posted it as "Cleveland Tourism Board" and not Cleveland Tourism Board. I have my doubts about you, though.

Posted by: Mcluskyist profile link in reply to ronton's comment at 04/16/09 3:49 PM | Reply
Score = 2 Vote up Vote down
adrienne

I think Cleveland was maybe a bit different in the '70s and '80s. Columbus is more of the place to be now, which is saying A LOT.

Posted by: adrienne profile link in reply to ronton's comment at 04/16/09 3:50 PM | Reply
Score = 1 Vote up Vote down
Genevieve

You really think the Cleveland Tourism Board produced that & not just some funny local guys? It kinda makes me wanna move to Cleveland. They're so retro.

Posted by: Genevieve profile link at 04/16/09 3:31 PM | Reply
Score = 1 Vote up Vote down
t.a.m.s.y.

YEAH CLEVELAND! REPRESENT! WE ARE ALL WITNESSES! PAY PHONES, BABY! WOOO!

Btw, that bit about W. 6th? It's funny because it's true.

Posted by: t.a.m.s.y. profile link at 04/16/09 4:29 PM | Reply
Score = -2 Vote up Vote down
apesofmath

Tampa - palm trees = Cleveland

Posted by: apesofmath profile link at 04/16/09 4:37 PM | Reply
Score = 7 Vote up Vote down

Oh man, they show my favorite hot dog vendor next to the Terminal Tower!

Posted by: Drew at 04/16/09 4:46 PM | Reply
Score = 0 Vote up Vote down

This video was made by a local cleveland comedian Mike Post who has been on local cleveland TV and does a web series called man in the box (nothing to do with alice in chains). i saw him once at a comedy show. fairly funny. Cleveland has a long history coming from its local tv channels. clveland tv personality Ghoulardi, who did the loveboat voiceover, was paul thomas anderson's dad. and dorf came out of a ghoulardi spinoff. crazy cleveland tv.

Posted by: lennycrist at 04/16/09 6:32 PM | Reply
Score = 1 Vote up Vote down

damn I just had a HUGE discussion yesterday with my friends about how I'm tired of defending ohio, haha.

but what someone said about columbus is true - columbus is the place to be.

I will say though, I live right by youngstown, and a tourism video for that might rival detroit's.

Posted by: emm at 04/16/09 7:33 PM | Reply
Score = -1 Vote up Vote down

Aw, shee-it. I'm Akron-adjacent and, yeah, Youngstown is the brunt of many of our sad, sad jokes.

Posted by: thefaintingcycle in reply to emm's comment at 04/17/09 8:28 AM | Reply
Score = -1 Vote up Vote down

Two lulz. First, guy/girl who said s/he "doubted that the Tourism Board made it." Not the sharpest tool in the shed. (Same person said that it's a short drive from Cleveland to NY.) Second, two of you said that Columbus is where it's at. Two of you. Columbus. Columbus Ohio.

Posted by: BLT at 04/16/09 9:07 PM | Reply
Score = 8 Vote up Vote down

compared to the REST OF ohio, yeah, columbus is where it's at.

Posted by: ... in reply to BLT's comment at 04/16/09 9:35 PM | Reply
Score = 4 Vote up Vote down

Columbus is great. It's one of the better midwestern cities and definitely the best city in Ohio. Yes, it's becoming kind of a hipster mecca which is annoying, but aside from that it's got something for everyone, whether you are a city mouse or a country mouse.

Posted by: Lisa in reply to BLT's comment at 04/17/09 2:02 AM | Reply
Score = 2 Vote up Vote down
Mcluskyist

Not to hate, but "hipster mecca"? Really? I mean, c'mon.

Posted by: Mcluskyist profile link in reply to Lisa's comment at 04/18/09 3:08 PM | Reply
Score = 5 Vote up Vote down

Driving directions to Cleveland, OH
463 mi – about 7 hours 36 mins

Posted by: rntn in reply to BLT's comment at 04/17/09 11:27 PM | Reply
Score = 1 Vote up Vote down

but west 6th is really where you go if you're a douchebag
real talk

Posted by: nicole profile link at 04/17/09 1:36 PM | Reply
Score = 3 Vote up Vote down

Weirdly, Cleveland has a great art museum and a world-class orchestra. Too bad no one cares about that stuff in Cleveland.

The biggest virtue that Columbus has over Cleveland is that there are actually young people there -- b/c of OSU. Walking around Cleveland is like walking around some sort of weird "Children of Men" set.

Posted by: Noel at 04/17/09 1:47 PM | Reply
Score = 7 Vote up Vote down

You know why people still make fun of Cleveland - because we're awesome. If we were truly 100% pathetic, no one would care. Besides all the things mentioned above and Harvey Pekar, I’ll add that Cleveland has spirit – even with our shit economy and shit sports teams, we never stop believing. As they say, “Cleveland: You’ve Got to be Tough”.

Posted by: Sam at 04/17/09 2:33 PM | Reply
Score = -3 Vote up Vote down
Logan

lakewood!

Posted by: Logan profile link at 04/18/09 2:14 AM | Reply
Score = 3 Vote up Vote down

i lived there for 22 years, moved away for 6, and now i want to go back. heard they are gonna build a thunderdome...could be sweet.

Posted by: steeb at 04/20/09 6:53 PM | Reply
Score = 1 Vote up Vote down

Chicago > New York

Posted by: bottlesUp at 04/21/09 12:02 AM | Reply
Score = 0 Vote up Vote down

Cleveland ROCKS! I grew up in the "Mistake on the Lake" and spent many summers at Put-In-Bay and lots of nights at Shooters or Fagan's in the flats! Clevelanders are some of the hardest working hardest playing and friendly people I know! Someone will stop to help if your broken down and we LOVE our Rock -N -Roll, beer & football !!!! I live in California now and love it but my values and work ethic come from Cleveland and I love the city and all it's people!!! GO CLEVELAND and oh yeah...Pittsburgh sucks (we love that rivalry too)!!!

Posted by: birdiesue at 04/21/09 5:28 PM | Reply
Score = 0 Vote up Vote down

Cleveland ROCKS! I grew up in the "Mistake on the Lake" and spent many summers at Put-In-Bay and lots of nights at Shooters or Fagan's in the flats! Clevelanders are some of the hardest working hardest playing and friendly people I know! Someone will stop to help if your broken down and we LOVE our Rock -N -Roll, beer & football !!!! I live in California now and love it but my values and work ethic come from Cleveland and I love the city and all it's people!!! GO CLEVELAND and oh yeah...Pittsburgh sucks (we love that rivalry too)!!!

Posted by: birdiesue at 04/21/09 5:28 PM | Reply
Score = -1 Vote up Vote down

Ohio = White Africa

Posted by: ModernMANdroid at 04/23/09 3:48 PM | Reply
Score = 1 Vote up Vote down

Lots of Ohioans on here...have any even mentioned Cincinnati? Ew.

Poor Clevelanders, they are a proud people. I live in Dayton and Cleveland is a cultural mecca compared to this hellhole. I visit my friends in Cleveland once every couple of months and there is always something for us to do up there, so it isn't that bad. It's no Dayton.

Posted by: merkinsocks at 05/02/09 1:07 PM | Reply
Score = 0 Vote up Vote down

Where are the potholes????

Posted by: Jeff at 05/08/09 10:47 AM | Reply
Score = 0 Vote up Vote down

I was raised in Cleveland when it was one of the 10 largest cities in the country, with booming industry that had dangerously polluted Lake Erie. Its downtown was usually deserted and no one with two nickels to knock together lived in the city. On the other hand, it had many beautiful suburbs with good schools and the ethic of very little public transportation since you could own a car, thus keeping out the riffraff. Well, since then, industry, as this "faux commercial" notes, has fled, as it has most of the country and Cleveland must re-invent itself. Perhaps this time, it will be for the better. Despite the harsh winters, its location is geographically excellent in terms of commerce, the land is fertile (or at least was) and opportunity to get it right this time might be tantalizing to some. Go for it!

Posted by: Babe at 05/16/09 12:44 PM | Reply
Score = 0 Vote up Vote down

Leave a comment


Staff

  • Founder/Editor-In-Chief: Scott Lapatine
  • Senior Editor: Gabe Delahaye
  • Executive Editor: Amrit Singh

Info

Contact

You Can Make It Up logo
Gabe loves fan fiction. You Can Make It Up features his own personal alternate adventures starring some of our favorite characters.

You Can Make It Up: People Tell Carrie Prejean What An Asshole She Is

Carrie Prejean turned the video camera off, put on some clothes, and stepped out of her house. It was a beautiful day outside. The air smelled like apples, and the late morning light hit the world in just such a...

MORE »

The Hunt For The Worst Movie Of All Time logo
After watching Death Sentence, a terrible movie starring Kevin Bacon as a father in search of vigilante justice directed by Saw's James Wan, Gabe embarked on The Hunt For The Worst Movie of All Time. This is his sad journey.

The Hunt For The Worst Movie Of All Time: In The Land Of The Women

If you are a sassy and sarcastic young man in an American sitcom who represents the sitcom writer's desire that a nerdy Jewish teenager can somehow be the desirable romantic hero in this world, then eventually you will get a...

MORE »

Monsters' Ball logo
This week's five highest rated comments as voted on by you, the lowest rated comment as voted on by you, and the editor's choice.

Monsters' Ball: The Week's Best Comments

I shouldn't even be here right now. I SHOULD BE GETTING INTO MY COSTUME! If I don't hurry, my facepaint won't be dry before I get to the MOONVIE theater, and everyone will be like "hahah, you look like you're...

MORE »

Double Dog logo
Blogging about TV and movies isn't all fun and videogames. Every week, Lindsay or Gabe will be presented with a physical or mental challenge that tests their bravery,patience, and taste.

Double Dog: I Took A TV Bus Tour Alone In A "Just Jack" Tshirt

The Challenge: I had to go on a 3.5 hour bus tour of totally random TV and film locations in New York City. Alone, and wearing a specific ridiculous tshirt. And I had to find someone to take my picture...

MORE »

Videogum Movie Club logo
Let's all go to the movies, and let's all see the same movie, and let's discuss it here.

The Videogum Movie Club: 2012

Uh. OK. Well, first let's address what this movie did well, like the disappointed parents we are (or at least that I am), recognizing that the negative feedback won't be useful or constructive if it isn't preceded by something positive....

MORE »