The Ultimate Thanksgiving Argument Settler: 5 Things I Am Thankful For
On yesterday's fourth hour of the Today Show with Kathie Lee Gifford and Hoda Kotb, Kathie Lee took a moment to remind everyone how wonderful she thinks it is that America has a holiday where we celebrate our gratitude. That's a totally nice sentiment from a woman whose self-centeredness has the mass of a collapsed sun. Granted, she then went on to add that she doesn't know any other country in the world that has a holiday like that, which is an ignorant and pointless bark of jingoistic triumph. Thanksgiving began as a celebration of the harvest, and the idea that no one else on Earth celebrates the harvest just because we're the only ones who get work off to spend the next Friday shopping for leather iPhone cases is patently ridiculous.
But look at me carrying on.
As the somewhat more negative half of the Videogum team, just by a little, I embrace this opportunity to have a post where I celebrate gratitude. And I don't know any other blog on the internet that does that. After the jump, five things that I am thankful for. The list is not complete, as those who know me can tell you that I like as many as seven things at any given time, but it is true.
Dudes Doing the "Single Ladies" Dance in the Snow
There's a time for trying to prove you're cool and smart and there's a time for putting on a one-piece bathing suit and a hunter's cap and doing the "Single Ladies" dance in the snow. It's not even about being funny or ironic, it's just about doing what needs to be done. Thank you, dudes doing the "Single Ladies" dance in the snow.
The Lazy Cat
In the famous words of Gustave Flaubert, "The Lazy Cat, c'est moi." STOP TOUCHING ME. I'VE GOT TO GET THAT NAP. Thank you, Lazy Cat.
The American Idol Girls
The older you get, the more disconnected you become from the raw emotional core of your youth, where event was the most important thing in your life, and no one, especially your parents, understood anything about the way the world really worked. But sometimes it's nice to be reminded that everything kind of IS a life or death emergency. Thank you, American Idol girls.
Chuck Bass
Thank you, Chuck Bass.
Moms
I think we can all agree that moms are the best, and that they don't get enough credit. Please join me in giving all the moms out there a shout out. Let's get off moms because I just gave a shout out to yours. Etc. Thank you, moms.
See you Monday!
Posted by Gabe at 1:30 PM in The Ultimate Argument Settler
Tags: Thanksgiving
I love how one of the American Idol girls goes "how could they vote for the loser that doesnt even shave!?!" And I had no idea my boyfriend had even been on American Idol....ZING!
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If only they realized the other one didnt' shave either.
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hahahaha
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It's so hard to show genuine laughter on the internet. : (
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that first guy gets points for doing the dance in the snow, but no one can top shane. i love his pose in the "thanks for watching" still.
i second the thanks for chuck bass.
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"i like as many as seven things at any given time."
i'm patently shocked. i kind of always thought of gabe as the ultimate hater and i liked it that way.
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uggggh, Single Ladies is so beasty. And so is the choreography.
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the snow dancer is really impressive.
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Canada has a similar holiday, also centred around the harvest and gratitude.
It's called Thanksgiving.
I hate you, Kathy Lee.
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Ha-HA! Moms. I love you mom! (Mom, I know you are really Gabe so you can stop pretending now.)
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that'll do, gabe. That'll do
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i'm thankful that conservative talking head and well known evildoer Ann Coulter has has her jaw wired shut.
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i'm thankful for that crudely drawn bleeding penis turkey head.
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That snow dancer's got some serious hip action going on. I'm rather impressed.
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american idol girls' reaction = the lost crew footage from the event horizon (wish i could find link)
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IT HAS BEEN 4 DAYS
WHERE IS MY VIDEOGUM
WHERE IS MY SPAGHETTI CAT!!!!
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I am thankful for Gabe at Videogum!
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hilarious stuff. those american idol girls are great.
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