The Hunt For The Worst Movie Of All Time: Boondock Saints
After watching Death Sentence, a terrible movie starring Kevin Bacon as a father in search of vigilante justice directed by Saw's James Wan, Gabe embarked on The Hunt For The Worst Movie of All Time. This is his sad journey.
The Boondock Saints is unique to the Hunt. So far we have definitely had a couple of nominees that are renowned for being terrible (Battlefield Earth, I Know Who Killed Me, Hudson Hawk), but this is the first film to enter the competition that was so disastrous in its production and so notoriously panned by critics that there's actually a documentary about the movie, Overnight, that is arguably as successful as the movie itself. Two friends told me this weekend that they hadn't seen Boondock Saints, but they had seen the documentary about Boondock Saints. So that basically proves that it's more successful. I should probably become a Professor of Logic. IN ANY CASE, what do you say about a movie that has been the subject of ridicule since it was made in 1999? What do you say about a movie that is widely recognized as a ridiculous parody of itself? I will tell you. You say let's keep ridiculing this movie that is a ridiculous parody of itself, you guys, because oh man, this is a hilariously horrible movie!
Basically, the "Boondock Saints" refers to two Irish brothers (although I think sometimes in the movie they're referred to as cousins?) in Boston who get in a bar fight with a Russian mob guy and then the Russian mob guy comes to kill them but instead they end up killing him, and from that moment on they realize that they are going to be professional vigilante justice killers who exclusively kill bad guys and make the world a better place. Meanwhile, Willem Dafoe is a gay FBI agent who is chasing them, but then eventually he gets drunk and decides that he likes what they are doing. At the end of the movie, an Italian mob boss hires a senior citizen to kill the Boondock Saints, but he hears them praying in a basement and decides instead that he wants to join the Boondock Saints in their quest for vigilante justice, so now there are three Boondock Saints, and then Willem Dafoe lets them into a coutroom with all of their guns and they execute a man in front of everyone to let the world know that they are the Boondock Saints and they are here to kill. Normally my write ups of the Worst Movie plots are kind of silly but this one is actually pretty straight forward. The movie made about as much sense as this paragraph.
There are a lot of things that make this movie terrible, but first and foremost we have to focus on Willem Dafoe. If the terribleness of this movie is a ship, Willem Dafoe is the drunk captain. If the terribleness of this movie is a song, Willem Dafoe is the off-key chorus. If the terribleness of this movie is an OK, you get the point. You guys, look at this:
Cramazing. I'm pretty sure Nicolas Cage watched this every morning before hitting the Wicker Man set and was like "walking in the shadows of giants, Nic, walking in the shadows of giants." The Netflix sleeve for this movie describes Willem Dafoe's character as "openly gay," but that's not quite accurate. I think "a ridiculous gay stereotype that isn't even a stereotype but is just weird and not how anyone acts ever anywhere" would be a more appropriate description. Or also "openly huh?"
The writer and director of The Boondock Saints, Troy Duffy, claims that the movie is based on his own experiences in Los Angeles. OK! If I had to guess based on the movie he'd made, I'd think he had a bunch of experiences involving Russian and Italian caricatures with horrible fake accents who couldn't act their way out of a Xenophobic stereotype.
But apparently what happened is he saw some EMT guys wheeling a dead body out of drug dealer's apartment, or something, and was like "WE NEED A TERRIBLE MOVIE THAT HAS NOTHING WHATSOEVER TO DO WITH MY NEIGHBOR'S APARTMENT." He was like "I HATE EVERYONE'S EYES."
To be fair, some of the movie's flaws were simply the magical combination that occurs when you mix high ambitions with low budgets. Things can quickly get out of hand. Suddenly your movie set is all like this. But that still doesn't explain the general lack of any kind of thoughtful decision making. For example, my favorite part of the whole movie (minus everything about Willem Dafoe) is the part where they scope out a strip club/peep show IN THE MIDDLE OF THE DAY.
Is that a seedy hub for Boston's criminal underworld, or an Olive Garden? How embarrassing. I just LOLed in my pants.
According to the internet, a sequel, Boondock Saints: All Saint's Day, may or may not have gone into production this past August. Supposedly it will have twice the budget, and none of the Willem Dafoe. Poor Troy Duffy. He's like a pre-internet YouTube star who doesn't realize that people laughing at you is not the same as people laughing with you, especially when people aren't exactly laughing. It's more like pointing. And shaking their heads. And saying "no."
Next week: Driven. As always, please leave your suggestions in the comments or in an email. And if you haven't done so already, please consult the Official Rules.
Posted by Gabe at 5:45 PM in The Hunt For The Worst Movie Of All Time
Tags: Norman Reedus | Sean Patrick Flanery | The Boondock Saints | Troy Duffy | Willem Dafoe
How this movie got a cult following is beyond me. I'm very glad to see this movie in the hunt, i seriously hate this movie so much, especially because so many people i've talked to think it's great. i watched this movie on VHS and i have a feeling if i watched it on dvd the picture quality would have been the exact same, so the movie has that going for it
Score = -2
fuck you guys, boondock saints is a great movie and the fact that you sit here and blog about movies all day makes me think that your opinions shouldn't really matter. But as you continue to "blog" you make this movie out to be some awful movie where there are far worse movies than this (Paranoid Park, Leprechaun 4: In Space two perfect examples....fucking idiots
Score = -18
It's really nothing to get that defensive about
Score = 1
This is late but...what? So many things wrong with this comment. But mostly its your grouping of Paranoid Park and Leprechaun 4: In Space together that is most offensive. That's just a really bizarre combination. PP was well received by critics and had a limited release. Leprechaun 4: In Space is, well, Leprechaun 4: In Space. Neither of them would qualify for WMOAT anyway. Neither features at least one B-list actor and L4 didn't have a theatrical release direct (I can't believe I took the time to look that up...).
Score = 0
This by the guy who sits and COMMENTS on blogs about movies all day.....hahahahaha.
Score = 1
Count me in as one of those people that have seen Overnight and not Boondock Saints. it's sorta like how I've seen inside Deep Throat, but have never seen Deep Throat, except that Deep Throat is porn... and probably a better movie than Boondock Saints.
Score = -5
i've never seen this movie, but one time i borrowed a boondock saints jacket from some kid and wore it around campus, and literally like 10 guys stopped me to tell me that it was their favorite movie. when i told them i had no idea what it was, they were horrified. guess i didn't miss out on much though.
Score = -5
Please do Lost In Space, THEY FLY THROUGH THE FUCKING SUN!!! THE FUCKING SUN!!!!!!!111
Anyway here's the IMDB link: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0120738/
Score = 1
Amen. Some dude made me watch this my freshman year of college because it "was like the best movie ever oh my god you haven't seen it? We are going to watch it right now come on!" I'm pretty sure it's only popular for dudes aged 15-22 who want another film where awesome dudes shoot less awesome dudes regardless of plot or how much sense it makes to shoot those dudes. Like Pulp Fiction was over their heads or something.
At least Willem Dafoe gets a hard-earned dollar every time some misfit 16-year-old buys this kickass-awesome DVD. His insanity deserves it.
Score = -1
it astounds me that not a single woody allen film has made this list.
also, this is written like a 16 year old's first argumentative writing assignment.
Score = -14
awesome line dude. i picked apart their agrgumentative un-prowess as well. check out my post its the one from 12/18/08. 11:53 pm. sam robinson. its the long ass paragraph
Score = -1
Wasn't part of the allure of this movie that it was too EXTREME to be released in US movie theaters? That's what my college roommate told me, anyhow.
Score = 3
The MPAA pulled the theatrical release because of the Columbine shootings. Just bad luck and bad timing, really. They did a limited, one night release in May a few years ago - that was the first time it was ever in theaters.
Score = 0
My investigative powers lead me to believe that Bearface is simply a ruse and his/her real identity is either Troy Duffy or Troy Duffy's self esteem lacking [and most likely abused] girlfriend because they are the only one's who would attack the review or defend the movie. Welcome Mr. Duffy and keep your verbal paws off Gabe's review.
Score = -3
My ex-boyfriend loved this movie and tried to get me to watch it. I got half-way through this movie before I just looked at him and said "If you wanted to break-up with me, you should have said so."
Score = 11
Umm, Ok- I'll admit that I am one of the people out there who like this movie, although I can agree that it's low budget and silly. I still like it- Kind of like how I still like Taco Bell- even though I know it's not real mexican food.
P.S. the senior citizen is their long lost father, & the two are brothers (twins).... and I think the movie is supposed to be about the indifference of man to evil and what law is more important- that of man or that of god... WHO the Fuck am I kidding?-
I liked the movie because Norman Reedus and Sean Patrick Flannery are hot- even with their horrible Irish accents (or maybe because of them), they have BFF tattoos in latin and also, there is gratuitous (from the latin gratuitus) violence.
Score = 10
hahahaha i love the tattoos too. and this movie is fantastic in its ridiculousness. do you not appreciate ridiculous movies? that's like not appreciating the 2nd & 3rd ninja turtles movies. you just have to sit back, enjoy the stereotype, and say wow this movie is amazing.
Score = 4
add me to the list of girls that like this movie... ok, love it. the first time i tried to watch it, i fell asleep. for some reason, i tried again, and now i've seen it probably 20 times. i can't help it! it's so quotable, and violent, and hotly irish(ish). it's the perfect hangover movie.
Score = 1
I'm glad you were unafraid to admit it too :-) Go Ninja, Go Ninja, Go!!! Nothing beats a cameo by Vanilla Ice!!!
Score = 3
I also enjoy this movie because of its ridiculousness. I know it's a bad movie, but I just can't help it. I love lots of violence. And I love that randi compared this movie to Ninja Turtles.
Score = 1
I just remembered - Billy Connolly is their dad, right?
There is nothing good about this film, and yet somehow I found it quite endearing.
Score = 0
How many likes can I put into a comment? I hate myself :-(
Score = 2
Girls are stupid.
Score = -7
Thanks Fuzzy! That's a great weight of my mind- here I was- believing I was all alone in thinking that girls are stupid. I'm glad I'm not (alone.)
You know what I think- I think all the stupid girls should be put in a rocket and shot iinto the center of the sun- myself included.
Score = 0
also, you should do v for vendetta. i'm just saying. that movie ... i don't get its appeal.
Score = -5
Randi loves the Ernest Goes To...movies and hates the Godfather. It's too thinky.
Score = 5
I love this movie dearly, but I was not aware that this was not a comedy until NOW.
My bad.
Score = 3
I like this movie. It may be a terrible story, but it is not like it is pretending to be anything other than a mindless action flick.
I'd chose watching this over most prime time TV shows.
Score = 4
White Chicks! Has no one nominated White Chicks yet? You should do White Chicks.
Score = 0
Blair Witch Project. Can you do that one? Or is it non-valid for lack of A-, B-list celebrity? I think all the hype surrounding the movie when it was released should make up for that. Really...I know you'd have sooo much fun doing one of these on Blair Witch Project.
Score = 0
since you've reviewed this movie you might as well watch Suicide Kings. I seem to remember a high school friend heartily recommending both of those (AH BRO THEYRE SO KICK ASS!!)
Score = 2
this movie is the worst. i think i first saw this movie when i was 10 or something and even then i was like hey, these gay stereotypes are not working for me. hey, blowing a cat to bits, not cool. also worst fake irish accents ever.
Score = -2
Domino is right up there with Driven. The story is fabricated, the lead character is annoying and it reunites David Silver and Steve Sanders on the silver screen. The action sequences and all other sequences wreak of melodrama...
Score = 1
celebrity hostages!
Score = 0
I have friends from Boston who have practically made this movie their religion. I expected great things when I finally got around to seeing it and was blown away with how spectacularly awful it turned out to be.
Score = 1
I'm actually a big fan of this movie. I think it is the over-the-top violence and minimal to nil plot that I like. Anyone who went in taking it serious totally missed the point. Point in case, "i killed your fucking cat!" Why no mention of the cat? I also see the appeal to anyone between 15 and 22 simply because of the drinking game associated with it. Not the best movie but shouldn't be anywhere near this list.
p.s. Willem Defoe: "get away from me you fairy."
Score = 1
you should do the Butterfly Effect because A. the acting is horrible (ashton kutcher!), B. it's called 'deep' and 'intelligent' by stupid people even though it is totally ridiculous, and C. a baby gets BLOWN UP!!!
Score = 2
I second Butterfly Effect. That can possibly be the worst movie ever.
Score = 0
I hated this movie! I watched maybe 1/2 of it & had to turn it off, which is very much not like me. So much gratuitous violence & ridiculous plot. The whole thing was just dumb. My good friend says this is her favorite movie. Makes me seriously reconsider our friendship.
They also did a tv show called Boondock Saints after this I think. Anyone back me up that?
Score = -3
I think you are talking about the Cartoon called The Boondocks....it has nothing to do with the Movie. It is a satire, about a black family from the south side of Chicago that moves to the suburbs "the boondocks". It's like Bebe's kids, except with actual points where it's funny.
Score = 4
Wait ... what's wrong with Suicide Kings?
Denis Leary as an asshole hitman, Christopher Walkin as a cooler than ice mob boss, Brad Garret as a buffoonish kidnapper, and Jay Mohr as an idiot.
Talk about perfect casting.
Suicide Kings has a decent narrative too - ya know, compared to Boondock Saints and Ultraviolet.
Score = 1
Come on i know the acting is poor and the characters lack any real depth. But out of the thousands of movies made and in the running for this honor i can hardly believe that this movie should even be brought up for this wonderful award
Score = 1
the person I've been married to for more than a decade LOVES this movie and genuinely doesn't understand why I don't. I'm so so so so happy to see you rip it up. Thank you! I was afraid that somehow it actually wasn't clearly, obviously terrible and I just missed an important cue. After all, I usually trust his judgment.
Score = -1
This movie absolutely deserves to be on this list BECAUSE there are so many people out there who would argue that it doesn't. It is poorly made, poorly acted, poorly written, non-sensical, and stupid. I love violent movies AND stupid movies, for that matter. But Boondock Saints definitely represents one of those weird cultural phenomenon moments for me when everyone is saying, "You're going to DIE this movie is so awesome." And then, it's clearly not awesome. Not at all.
Score = 4
Kudos, kudos, kudos. TERRIBLE movie. And I love gratuitous violence and shitty acting even. This flick is just pure secondhand shit stole from any and every violent movie before it. It sucks Tarantinos cock basically. But in a totally bad way leaving like herpes or something. REVIEW TOMB RAIDER, THE SWEETEST THING, or CHARLIES ANGLES 2!!!!!!!
Score = -1
Can I nominate a couple of things? First, The Sweetest Thing (Cameron Diaz, Christina Applegate, Slema Blair) is the worst movie I've even seen. Except for, perhaps, Dungeons and Dragons, which I'm embarassed that I've seen. It has Jeremy Irons. Really, Jeremy? WTF?
Score = 2
p.s. P.S. I love you, solely for the title.
I too fell for the university hype for Boondock. At the time I didn't mind it too much, but it's been many years of snobbery since so things could change.
Score = 1
whoever wrote this post is slightly tarded....the whole point of this movie was that it was over the top and stupid! good lord. Its entire purpose was making fun of pointlessly violent movies. Willem Dafoe was hilarious in this movie, and i enjoyed it thoroughly. Its a unique combination of an obvious plot, humor, and violence. stop being a movie-noob.
You are like an 8 year old who doesn't understand satire. Watch it again.
Score = -5
Seriously? Try listening to the director's commentary, or watching the feature length documentary about the making of the movie, or basically just consulting any source of information other than the one you based your post on. It's not meant as satire. It's just an action movie made by a Catholic guy who loves Tarantino and believes in vigilante justice. Also, Willem Dafoe's character is just a cheap way to insert some homophobia into the movie without getting in trouble for it. That's actually why everyone I know who loves the character does so: "he's gay, but he hates fags, so it's ok!"
Score = 4
fine! then its retarded and hilarious. That doesn't make it bad. It makes it incredibly enjoyable.
Score = -2
All of my friends in high school loved this movie unironically.
Just curious though, did you not catch that the senior citizen is actually their long lost father, or did you just not include it in the summary for some reason? I always thought that made it extra hilarious.
Score = 0
Yeah, this movie blows. I also went through the experience of having everyone tell me to watch it because it was supposedly awesome, but I realized about 15 minutes in that everyone I know is a fucktard.
Score = 0
I love Willem Dafoe and I'm (quite unironically) a big fan. I think what happened here is that he saw how bad this movie was going to be and decided to push it from there into "really, really ridiculous".
BTW, all the people who recommended it to me are women writing incest porn about the brothers...
Score = 0
Man, I hate this movie. Good call.
By the way, please oh please add Batman and Robin into the mix. That movie was blindingly bad, Gabe.
Score = 0
remember when a long comment thread on here would be like, 5 comments?
Score = 0
Gabe,
I nominate "Artificial Intelligence: AI" for the Worst Movie of All Time. In case you don't remember this particularly terrible film, it was directed by Steven Spielberg in 2001 and starred Haley Joel Osment, Jude Law, and William Hurt. With lines like "I know women! They sometimes ask for me by name. I know all about women. About as much as there is to know. No two are ever alike, and after they've met me, no two are ever the same!", I think this is a pretty awesome nominee. I've never hated myself so much than when I had to sit through Haley Joel Osment stare at a fairy doll in the ocean for God knows how long before he is captured by aliens and reunited with his mother. I hope you consider this one.
Score = 2
they're futuristic robots! not aliens! robots!
Score = -2
Actually, there are both robots and aliens in this film. Which is what makes it so terrible. That and everything else about it.
Score = 2
No. They're just robots. That's it.
Score = -1
In my fifteen odd years of using this internet thing, I have maybe commented on a post...oh, 13 times? But my deep and abiding hatred for this movie compels me to chime in. I hate this movie. I hate the people who made it. I hate the cameras that were used to shoot it. I used to love Willem Dafoe. Then I saw this movie.. I try not to judge people too much for their personal artistic taste, but I definitely use this film as a litmus test. If you like it, our paths shant cross again. The one good thing about this movie is the documentary about the making of this movie. If Troy Duffy ever got laid again after the release of that doc, then there is no fucking justice in this world.
Score = 0
I agree that Boondock Saints is an awful film. I do. But you fail to acknowledge how much a lot of people LOVE this movie. Average, joe blo moviegoers, sure. But A LOT of them. It might have an 18 percent score on RT.com, but it has like a 7.9 score on IMDB.com. Not "The Godfather" by any stretch, but certainly a well-liked film
Like I said I agree with you, but you should have at least mentioned that everybody who likes this film is a moron.
Score = -1
Not everyone can be above average like you Micah.
Also, I wonder which is worse- The Boondock Saints or Beverly Hills Chihuahua?
Score = -1
Why do people like this?
Score = 0
you may not have received the memo, but judging by the other comments you are way out of line for asking this question. this is a site devoted to mocking things with little to no explanation. trying to understand things is dumb. presenting your opinion as objective truth is awesome. besides in asking that question we might learn something other than what movies a complete stranger doesn't like (after watching each movie knowing he's not going to like it).
Score = 0
I know this is by no means a great movie, but at least its entertaining. there are so many worse movies than this that the fact you would even consider this makes me question you tastes. And the fact that you can't even follow the plot of the movie to know that the "senior citizen" hired to kill them was their father makes me think you're either retarded or you didnt actually watch the movie
Score = -2
you try to hard to make these movies sound worse than they are... youre description of this movie is wrong and completely unrepresentative of this movie. If you have to try to make a movie sound so bad then it shouldnt be on this list despite how much you disliked it... plus your review is not funny at all. you sound like a sarcastic prick. just saying....
Score = -5
I think "the core" is the worst possible movie, let's see an analysis on that sucker
Score = 0
Lady in the Water. Has that already been recommended? If not, it should be.
Score = 0
THIS MOVIE BLOWS ASS!! EAT IT, TROY DUFFY APOLOGISTS!
Score = -3
frankly, your a tool.
Score = 2
How many movies have you written? Oh right, you're a critic, sorry I mean totally-not-gay gossip columnist. Straight guys can be effeminate I guess. You're so not a stereotype!
Score = -3
You don't have any idea what you're talking about. First of all Willem Dafoe is incredible in this movie, one of my favorite character that he plays. You probably think that the Village was a good movie.
Score = -3
Why can you not just enjoy a movie for what it is? A gore fest with a bit of tongue in cheek humor, stereotypes and funny accents attached. I love this movie and is on my top 10 list for sure.
I first saw it when i was 16/17ish, now 22. I have watched it at least once every year since i first saw it and i still love it.
It is absurd and wonderful.
Black Humor? Check
Gore? Check
Action? Check
Willem Dafoe? Check
I don't know about you, but that makes a entertaining movie for me.
People got to stop reading so fucking deep into shit.
Enjoy something for what it is.
Score = 1
WTF are u talking about. This is one of my favorite movies and i've never heard a bad thing about it til now. Fuck you. your stupid
Score = 0
Thanks for this - so many of my friends (mostly women, who I guess are attracted to the whole "bad boys with accents!" thing) love this movie, and I just didn't like it at all. It was just bad. Also, I hate the idea that bad boys are somehow hot.
Score = -3
agreed. balls to the wall suck.
Score = 0
oh man you guys hsould totally do titanic..shuch a bad moviee!!! you gues are the coolesest! make fun of thinkgs make fun of thinkgs!!!!
Score = -1
Ok, I've never seen this movie, but your account of it made me laugh so hard that I am actually in a fair amount of physical pain right now. I'm netflixing it, and shooting it straight to top-of-queue.
Score = -2
i haven't seen it yet either. but that willem defoe clip makes me want to. looks ridiculously awesome. but then awesome bad too
Score = 0
" At the end of the movie, an Italian mob boss hires a senior citizen to kill the Boondock Saints, but he hears them praying in a basement and decides instead that he wants to join the Boondock Saints in their quest for vigilante justice, so now there are three Boondock Saints..."
I believe that you do not understand. He is their father, off course he is not going to kill his own sons. You are stupid, he hears them saying the "family" prayer. Your taste in movies is terrible. But never the less, I have to write a persuesive paper in college and I need someone that disagrees with me upon the fact that the movie is brilliant, so welcome to my college paper, where I will ridicule you in ^_^.
Score = -2
You are ultra-lame.
Score = -2
Oh yeah, Obvious troll is obvious
Score = -1
Yes, there will be a sequel. It starts up soon in Toronto.
I know. I'll be working on it. lol.
Score = -2
you should really research or actually watch the film and pay attention before making stupid comments. everyone is entitled to their opinions so I'm not gonna bash you for your dislike in the movie or anyone else on the post but seriously you had some off information in your review man.
get your facts straight before flaming on anything you dislike because there will always be someone out there that loves what you hate and knows the facts about it as well and they will catch up on your mistakes and just use it to flame on you.
Score = -2
You know, as much as I love the Boondock Saints, that's really immaterial. Anybody who thinks any of the movies on this blog (with the possible exception of Driven) could possibly contend for 'Worst Movie of all TIme' should REALLY spend 15 minutes in any video store. In fact, just take 3 minutes in the horror section. You will find hundreds of pictures worse than anything anybody can think of in recent memory. Have you seen Ninja Cheerleaders? How about Going Overboard? Even if you exclude B-movies and straight-to-video junk, are you really going to keep a straight face when you say that any movie featured by this blog is worse than Baby Geniuses or its sequel? If those movies don't end your search, pal, I fear it shall never end.
Score = -3
Maybe, that's the point?
That it never ends.
Man, some people are dumb.
Score = 1
hey first off who ever wrote this blog sounds like he hasnt even seen the movie it sounds like he just read the back of the box. the old guy at the end is their father you twat who basiclly started the whole thing they never are reffered to as cousins and you know everyone that has watch that i know seem to enjoy it even if they say it sounds stupid an hell ya its not the best movie out there but its by far not the worst i agree ith the feller above me nija cheerleaders is a bad movie how bout stripper zombies or diary of the dead come on get of your high horses get a job a life and a girl you stupid twats
Score = -2
Old guy? It was their father who taught them the prayer he overheard. Did you even watch the movie?
Sounds to me more like this movie got thrown under the bus to get a little pissing contest going in hopes to earn some more visits. Sad...
Score = 0
boondock saints is the movie equivelant to Dane Cook. Everybody told you it/he was the best thing ever and then when you finally watched....well i had no fucking clue how anybody could find anything remotely enjoyable/funny about it. THey both ruined a lot of college days
Score = 4
The Boondock Saints is a classic! Yes, my 60 year old mother hates it, because my brothers and I watch it every holiday and laugh our butts off! It is ridiculous! It is cheaply made! It does have more F bombs than any movie I've ever seen! You should not let your kids watch it! It is violent! POOR CAT! LOL! It has more hilarious one liners than stand up comiedian could ever pull off in a night. My exgirlfriend does hate it too! All the above make it great! Those of you who haven't seen it, and want a good laugh, watch it. Those who did see it and didn't like it, are probably like the guy in bed with Willem Dafoe! But that is ok! You guys know what the rule of thumb is here right?
Score = -5
fuck this site fuck that guy. this movie is great. filled with metaphor and character depth. this is a fantastic movie that actually accomplished completely entrancing the viewer, assuming that the viewer has any cinematic taste or the cognitive function to understand it. let me guess most of you that dont like this movie like those stupid fucking movies like scary movie and meet the spartans and watch tv shows like the simpsons and family guy which require absolutely no intelligence or any kind of thought process to keep up with those shows are written with dumbass, sedentary minded american viewers in mind that dont want to think when they watch something. they just want to watch the same monotonous crap over and over again. heaven forbid a twist is thrown in at some point that will just throw off the entire idiotic audience. this movie was writted with actual intelligent viewers in mind that have the ability to think during a movie, who can ask intelectual questions, not dumb fucking questions like my old ass dad does when he misses half of the movie going out on smoke breaks, who walks in like a small child wandering into the middle of a conversation assuming the world starts and stops at his convenience. whoever wrote this article is so full of shit. maybe you should try paying attention to the movies you bash. its called knowing your refutation points. it just shows exactly how ignorant of a person you are to rip something apart without knowing anything about it. FUCK YOU ALL. GO TO HELL.
your logic is flawed.
Fuck Ass.
Score = -12
Yeah, the characters are so deep. We really get to know them in the 20 seconds before God randomly decides to instruct them to murder criminals. Or how bout that scene where they shoot a bunch of people. I felt so connected to their struggle. This movie contains so much fucking metaphor. Like when they have a poorly shot slow motion gunfight with their father from like 20 feet away and nobody dies. Unless, is that where that douchebag who shot the cat (like that scene wasn't a total Pulp Fiction rip-off,"Oops, I shot Marvin in the face," which is an overrated movie anyways) died? I can't remember because I didn't give a shit. So much for engrossing the viewer. How bout the metaphor of killing a man in court, because, you know, fuckin' justice system's so damn corrupt. Or when they say that bad-ass prayer. OH, IT'S SOOO BAD-ASS!!!! Generally, people who hate Boondock Saints are reasonable, intelligent people with a grasp of what makes films admirable. Contrarily, it is usually those with your opinion who laugh at retarded shit that mistakes reference for wit like Family Guy. I bet you love Sin City and 300 and other shitty style over substance movies, might I recommend Spirit? You probably also love crap that tries real hard to be deep and important when really its just stupid and pretentious like Donnie Darko. Also, The Simpsons was the cleverest show on T.V. for awhile. Don't assume it was meant for idiots just because it's sucked for the past 8 or so years. Stop pretending you know anything about films or keep your shitty, misguided opinions to yourself. All you're doing is plastering a big target symbol between your eyes with the words "pseudo-intellectual moron" written above it.
Score = 6
WOW! what an amazing life you must lead. checking up on several month old posts about a movie you hate. I bet you get all the ladies. aslo, cleverest? what kind of grades did you get in english class, i mean christ you shot your own argument down with that one. I found this place on accident looking up information about the sequel. what have you been doing for almost 3 months, coming back and checking on the posts for this movie? Jesus fucking Christ you bloggers are so pathetic. I feel disgusted that i signed up for this site just to throw in my 2 cents and retards like you feel the need to write a whole goddamn paragraph about how im an idiot. Dude, you need to get a life, get off the computer and find a chick or some real life friends like the ones i have that are laughing at your patheticism with me right now.
and dont bother getting angry or upset and venting your rage by writing another post because this experience has disgusted me so much i will not be returning to the site. I HATE BLOGGERS. all of you are pathetic sad individuals with no lives who have probably never been laid or at the most maybe by some fat self-esteem-less girl you just so happened to ask to prom at the last minute.
Peace out Douche-Bags
Score = -7
clev⋅er   /ˈklɛvər/ Show Spelled Pronunciation [klev-er] Show IPA Pronunciation
–adjective, -er, -est. 1. mentally bright; having sharp or quick intelligence; able.
2. superficially skillful, witty, or original in character or construction; facile: It was an amusing, clever play, but of no lasting value.
3. showing inventiveness or originality; ingenious: His clever device was the first to solve the problem.
clev⋅er   /ˈklɛvər/ Show Spelled Pronunciation [klev-er] Show IPA Pronunciation
–adjective, -er, -EST
Score = 0
clev⋅er   /ˈklɛvər/ Show Spelled Pronunciation [klev-er] Show IPA Pronunciation
–adjective, -er, -est. 1. mentally bright; having sharp or quick intelligence; able.
2. superficially skillful, witty, or original in character or construction; facile: It was an amusing, clever play, but of no lasting value.
3. showing inventiveness or originality; ingenious: His clever device was the first to solve the problem.
clev⋅er   /ˈklɛvər/ Show Spelled Pronunciation [klev-er] Show IPA Pronunciation
–adjective, -er, -EST
Score = -2
What a loser man! Atleast don't diss your dad over a fucking lame movie!!! You sir are exactly what is wrong with this country. The boondock saints is a horrible film and has inspired god knows how many, to take laws into their own hands. Guns, guns , guns... is their nothing else you people can masturbate over? Look at where this society has ended up with its gun loving vigilanteism... children shooting each other, jets dropping depleted uranium bombs over some other children somewhere, economy bankrupt and no healthcare for millions, can you blame those who turn to crime? is their no other form of entertainment left save cops and robbers or vigilantes and the mob? this generation has come to depend almost entirely on TV for their culture. Is this the message you want to send them? shame on you
Score = -1
ok. i just don't understand your logic. you see, i can understand you not liking this movie. to me its neither bad, nor great. its just ok. but there are just so many movies that are worse than this one, and you make such a huge deal out of it. any nick cage movie is worse than this. also, nearly every van-damme, mel gibson, arnold swartzanegger, and jim belushi movie. in fact, when you compare those movies to the boondock saints, i would much rather watch the latter. at least it has a few redeeming qualities (like bad jokes and cheesy shootouts), and you don't have to look at some overpaid, larger than life actor filling up the screen.
i am just asking for you to think a little more outside the box. i think you could come up with a better list of worse movies than this...
oh, and what about evolution?
Score = 0
By far one of the best movies ever. The guy is so stupid and narrow minded for even putting this movie on the list. There is so many actually BAD films that he didnt put on.
And the people who say they have seen the documentary and havent seen BS can't judge the film. Yea the director is an arrogant jerk and is pretty much a head case, but he is really good!
Score = -3
OMGZ! I'm a pretentious indie kid and every movie ever made lyke totally sucks!
Boohoo mother fucker. If you don't like the movie, never watch it again, never talk about it again, cry into your pillow every night if it helps you sleep. I could really care less, as long as it gets you all to shut the fuck up. It's a shame that all these people are making millions making all these "terrible" movies while you're all just sitting on your asses talking shit because you're obviously better than everyone else. Congratulations, they're just experiencing the life you fuckers wish you had.
Score = -5
the documentary was about troy duffy and how big of a prick he was. boondock saints just happened to be the movie he wrote and was having a canary over. while the movie isn't great, by no means is it the worst movie ever made. there are countless others that are far worse.
Score = -2
yeah, me and my friends felt you were crazy for adding this movie but after thinking about it I understand your feelings. I personally like this movie but i understand...
Score = 1
Man, some of the comments here are priceless! I knew the fans would be out in full force. Thanks for not letting me down and keep (never) reaching for the stars!
Score = 2
i think this review is totally unfair seeing as it was obviously written about the theatrical cut of the movie which SUCKS ASS
alot of cuts were made to acquire an R rating and theatrical release
since then a DVD of the original Director's Cut of the movie has been released and is one of my favorite films
the difference is like watching The Professional vs. Leon: The Professional
The Professional (the American theatrical release version of Luc Besson's brilliant movie Leon) sucked and made no sense because of parts of the storyline that were cut out to acquire an R rating
and Leon: The Professional (the international cut of the same film which runs about 25 minutes longer than the American cut) is AMAZING.
its the same way for Boondock Saints
the theatrical cut is SO BAD and has SO many plot holes
but the Director's Cut fills almost every plot hole and runs about 15 minutes longer
i highly recommend seeing the Director's Cut if all you have seen is the theatrical
if you don't like it still then it's just not for you, but it really is a great film
Score = 0
Your write-up on the summary of the movie could not be more simple and childish. For anyone who has actually seen the movie, the short (and overly concise) summary does not capture the spirit of the film. Anything can be depicted as "retarded" if you use (gasp!) retarded language: "Meanwhile, Willem Dafoe is a gay FBI agent who is chasing them, but then eventually he gets drunk and decides that he likes what they are doing." If I had described, let's say, The Godfather with rhetoric that contained as much ennui as your "summary" did (I only took a portion of your summary, but if you want me to point out other areas of similar language, I'd be glad to do so), of course the movie would sound completely ridiculous and "unrealistic." But nonetheless, here is my Gabe-stylized version of a particular scene in The Godfather:
"Fredo gets into a car with his dad, drives him to some grocery store in the middle of the street, where he gets shot in the back a couple times and falls down."
Now, this is arguably one of the most famous scenes in The Godfather. But to those who haven't seen it...well, who would honestly want to after reading something like that? My point is that your review is based mostly on prejudice - you don't tell us WHY the movie is bad save for a few mocking comments about the film's absurdly lofty theme of vigilantism (I THINK that may actually exist in the real world, no?). And in case you haven't noticed, it's a movie and I'm pretty sure there aren't any de facto standards that exclude highly fictionalized narratives from the realm of "good movies".
As for your argument about stereotypes, what is wrong with Willem Dafoe's perfomance? Are you confident enough to claim that there have been, are, or will be absolutely no individuals in the homosexual community to act like this?
Again, I'm not necessarily saying that this movie is a good one (although I thoroughly enjoyed it and thought that Dafoe's performance was nothing short of hilarious). Just please please please don't use your bias against the film as the main source of criticism. If you didn't like, tough. Just don't use that as a reason to claim that the movie is terrible.
Score = 0
Ya, well this movie is awesome. I love how you mention the fim critics slamming this movie, lets laugh about them, how many suck a?? movies did they thumbs up? who in the right mind listens to critics, besides this person who wrote this post
Score = -4
I literally just finished watching Boondock Saints because Netflix is on my XBOX now and I was all like, "What the fuck?" Two things: 1. That crazy bartender in the beginning is Doc from Fraggle Rock you guys! and 2. I can't believe that there are so many people who are so riled up about anyone talking shit about this movie. It was OK. Whatever. Would I argue passionately either way about it? No. I fact, I just got bored writing that.
What I think is more important to talk about, however, is how riled up all kinds of people get when I talk about what a huge pile of the rankest shit the movie Sideways is. I humbly submit it for your consideration in the Hunt.
Score = 1
Why has no one ever commented on the fact that this movie includes the fine (clothed) acting of Ron Jeremy? Awesome. lol
Score = 1
The first post on this thing that person is a retard - a movie isn't merited by its picture quality - there are some excellent old movies, shitting film quality. this movie kicks ass; its raw and real and has ideas that we all think about and feel when it comes to crazy crime stuff!! For this genre of movie this one is the fucking best!!
Score = 1
The first post on this thing that person is a retard - a movie isn't merited by its picture quality - there are some excellent old movies, shitting film quality. this movie kicks ass; its raw and real and has ideas that we all think about and feel when it comes to crazy crime stuff!! For this genre of movie this one is the fucking best!!
Score = 1
wow...you must like this movie alot to write an entire artical on it. Get over it. It's really not that bad. Cant wait for the sequel! haha
Score = 0
Obviously you have no reason to be faking a critic, because your writing is underdeveloped and very amateur... all i can say is get a life fuckface and go suck your boyfriend's small hairy dick. The movie is a better movie than most people could make on such a low budget and has both comedy and a deeper meaning to things. What makes up the cult of fans is not based on the quality like the stupid fuckers who watch The Dark Knight but the ideal of two men who fought for God.
Score = 0
This is hands down one of the worst movies I've ever seen, and definitely one of the worst Pulp Fiction wannabe knock offs that were coming out at that time. Pretty much anyone could have written this script, and that was the thought that kept going through my head while watching it.
Score = 0
after reading this article, stereogum has lost all credibility is my eyes. this movie is sweet. sorry that you don't appreciate willem dafoe mocking gay dudes like yourselves. this is definitely on my top 10 favorite movies of all time list.
Score = -1
look i get that this movie was made cheap and looks bad but it was a good movie. ok i get that this movie is not for everyone but it has a unique plot and great acting by everyone but willem dafoe.
Score = 0
Are you kidding me? This is a great movie! Also if you didn't pay attention to the movie they were saying their family prayer and when the "senior citizen" heard the prayer he joined in. Not sure if you understand that that means they are family. Wow good catch there. Also they are never reffered to as cousins just fyi.
Score = 0
I still can't figure out why so many people claim that this movie is so great. Better than Snatch? Ronin? The Departed? Really? C'mon now.
It's a poorly executed movie version of what was already a bad idea. So, even if this movie had been directed, acted, and produced flawlessly, (which it most certainly was not), it would still suck ass.
I have a theory though...I asked myself, "Self, what is so different about this movie that it could make an entire group think that it's the best thing ever?" Here's an idea: church-sanctioned (and police-sanctioned) vigilanteism. Basically, "do what you want, it ain't a sin!" I think frustrated catholics just might be making up the fan base for this one, and if that's the case, you have my condolences.
Score = 0
Boondock saints made my top ten best movies of all time. Thanks! I'm not religious, I'm not for vigilantism (or whatever it's called) and I'm certainly not going to let myself be dictated by anyone on what movies to like or not.
Score = 0
Meh, I liked it okay, and I think I have pretty good taste in movies.
(My top 100 list is here: http://www.movieforums.com/community/showthread.php?t=15953 )
Score = -1
It's funny how 1/2 of the drunken Troy Duffy lickspittles are like, "It's too deep for you! You can't comprehend its startlingly rich subtext and complex, evocative mise en scene!"
The other half are saying, "OMG ur a bunch of fags! You probly only like gay movies where everything makes sense n stuff! fuck U!"
I mean, pick a side.
Score = 0
Hahahaha I actually dug this film but the avalanche of indignant butthurt here is hilarious.
Score = 2
Please do the Leonardo Dicaprio/Baz Luhrmann version of Romeo + Juliet!
Score = 0
Please do the Baz Luhrmann/Leonardo Dicaprio version of Romeo + Juliet or the Billy Bob Thornton version of Bad News Bears!
Score = 0
I really liked this movie and everyone i know who has watched it liked it. I didn't have problem with the plot, but that's just me.
Score = 0
They blog about movies all day because people like yourself read them and they can make money.
Score = 0
The worst fucking movie ever fucking made. You were too generous.
Score = 0
Yea um...you should find a new job. You shouldn't be allowed to critique a movie if you obviously misunderstood huge chunks of it (or just didn't watch it. which i hope is the case because if you did and misunderstood it this badly you should spend more time in your special classes than watching movies you can't even comprehend). This review seems like it was written by someone who has smoked themselves retarded and thinks writing reviews somehow makes him an intellectual, but in reality all it does is make you look like a dense moron. If you don't even understand that "the guys" are twin brothers, that the irish man who "hears them praying in a basement and decides instead that he wants to join the Boondock Saints in their quest for vigilante justice" is their father, or that dafoe's character is how plenty of gay guys who don't behave like women act... not to mention if you seriously believe that strip clubs don't have business during the day (which i'm not even sure happens during the day in the movie i'm pretty sure you just got that picture off the internet) you have some serious brain functioning problems. I really hope no one pays you to write this bullshit, because they are being ripped off since you are either retarded or just flat out didn't even watch the movie. I was embarrassed for you while reading this.
Score = 0
The first time I saw this movie, I didn't realize Willem Dafoe's character was gay until the scene where he was cuddling naked with a man. Up until now, I thought his character was secretly gay, and just acted like a creepy sarcastic eccentric old dude for reasons unrelated to his sexuality. It appears that neither Troy Duffy nor WIllem Dafoe have ever actually met a gay man.
Also, I had no idea that this movie was widely recognized as terrible, because I'm 22, and everyone else my age has been madly in love with this movie since high school (as illustrated by most of the above comments). It's so widely beloved that I wouldn't even characterize it as a cult following. It's just popular.
Score = 0
The first time I saw this movie, I didn't realize Willem Dafoe's character was gay until the scene where he was cuddling naked with a man. Up until now, I thought his character was secretly gay, and just acted like a creepy sarcastic eccentric old dude for reasons unrelated to his sexuality. It appears that neither Troy Duffy nor WIllem Dafoe have ever actually met a gay man.
Also, I had no idea that this movie was widely recognized as terrible, because I'm 22, and everyone else my age has been madly in love with this movie since high school (as illustrated by most of the above comments). It's so widely beloved that I wouldn't even characterize it as a cult following. It's just popular.
Score = 0