That's Your Boyfriend: Dutch Piano Player
Your boyfriend wrote this song for you. (NSFW lyrics, headphones UP.)
You take your men the way you take your coffee: jaunty and foreign and weird. One time, when you were both visiting your parents, you casually mentioned his love for the piano, and your mom said "oh, that's so nice, why don't you play us one of your little songs," and things are weird now when you go back home.
Posted by Gabe at 2:00 PM in That's Your Boyfriend
Tags: Dutch Singer | Sex
The ears. There is something wrong with them.
Score = 11
I'll tell you what's wrong with his ears: he's spent so much time making vomit fall out of them with his sickening songs that they've become disfigured. When you put garbage in, you get God-delivered-physical-disfigurements ya'll. This mother fucker deserves his evil, elfish look for what he has done. Mother fucker probably has sex in those vomit ears.
Score = -24
Okay, okay, I had a theory that you and da cake eatur were the same person, but now I'm absolutely positive that this is the case. You both disappeared for three weeks at the same time, and you magically reappeared within a day of each other. I've just cracked this case wide open, Law & Order style.
Score = 24
If that's the case, can you just stop doing this American Patriot one and only do da cake eatur. I'm not entirely sure who the audience is for this character. It's a schtick that's already so played out people are down-voting you out of boredom. Despite what you may think you aren't ruffling any feathers with your faux-conservatism. You are just boring the hell out of us. Unless that is your point, to bore the hell out of people with a deliberately unoriginal and unimaginative troll attempt. If that is your motivation, then you are one sick asshole.
Score = 13
How bout he does neither "character"? I'm all for that. BYE.
Score = 2
He's espousing the Walter Sobchak school of Conservatism.
Score = 0
i am not him
Score = -1
His ears are entrancing.
Score = 2
I would fuck you in your ears...
Score = 8
Yep, my door is closed. Accurate.
Score = 20
insert pianist joke*
*Thats what she said**
**in bed
Score = 9
I give him points for honesty and straightforwardness.
Score = 20
I know. So tired of the gamez. I wish more ppl would just straight up sing me all the ways in which they would fuck me.
Score = 14
Many blues songs are written as sexual metaphors, which makes his the social equivalent of, “Hi, nice to meet you. Let’s have sex.” It’s creepy in any context.
Score = 2
I'm ashamed to admit this, but I have a cousin who would be all over that guy. Hi, Debbie!
Score = 11
I take back what a said about the new lo-fi being kids singing. This is the new lo-fi.
Score = 3
In fact, Mr. P is a Dutch comedian by the name of Wim De Bie, who did a lot of this kind of revolutionary satirical bits, mostly together with Kees Van Kooten. For example: the Dutch subtitles actually mean: 'You're so pretty, I think you're neat, you're a great cook, I want to eat your food' and so on, and the 'aplommunicatie' in the beginning is one of their many neologisms, meaning 'communication with aplomb' - obviously.
I guess non-Dutch-speaking people won't get the joke.
Score = 13
He IS my boyfriend.
Score = 0
Oh, and the ears are definitely fake.
Score = 7
Reminds me of Notorious B.I.G.'s "I'm Fucking You Tonight."
Score = 2
Or Eazy-E's "I Wanna Fuck You".
Score = 0
so "ik vend je leuk" is Dutch for I want to fuck you.... I'll keep that in mind.
Score = 1
it actually means, "I like you."
RUINING EVERYTHING
Score = 4
My new ringtone. Thx
Score = 1
YOUNG RICHARD DUNN!
Score = 0
So Akon is Dutch.
Score = 8
day maker
Score = 0
Ahhhhhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha. Hahahahahahahaha. Hahahaha hahaha
Score = 0
So I kinda love this and my boyfriend.
Score = 0
As an added "joke" the Dutch subtitles are all very sweet and well meaning. For instance the first line is translated for the Dutch people as::
"Oh, how you're so pretty,
lying there in the hay"
Score = 0
I need this on my MP3 player immediately. It's my new summer anthem.
Score = 0