Andy Rooney Accidentally Plagiarizes 1981 SNL Parody Of Himself
Andy Rooney's always-entertaining commentary on last night's 60 Minutes was about shoes. Why don't they design better ones, why don't they fit, why does everyone have so many, and then a weird nostalgic story at the end just to make sure it didn't make too much sense. Anyway, I'm not suggesting that this is the first or even fourth time Andy Rooney has used his complaining column to talk about shoes, but a google search just now turned up an interesting SNL transcript.
SNL 1981, Season 7, episode 1:Andy Rooney...Joe Piscopo
[Open on the title "A FEW MINUTES WITH ANDY ROONEY"]
Announcer: And now, "A Few Minutes With Andy Rooney."
[Dissovle to Rooney sitting at a desk covered in shoes]
Andy Rooney: I've been doing some serious thinking about shoes. Ever notice shoes? Everybody wears them. Just look down. There's so many different kinds. A lotta shoes sound like what they are. Oxfords, work shoes, loafers. I guess the good thing about loafers is you don't have to tie them. Space shoes, boots! Ever notice there weren't many Nazis named Steve? You know what's annoying? When that little plastic thing on the end of your shoelaces falls off and gets frayed at the end, and you can't get 'em through the holes, and you gotta do this [licks end of shoelace] to do this. [pushes shoelace through hole in shoe] Ever notice what a weird name Morley Safer is? Morley, is that the opposite of Leslie? And Mike Wallace. Boy, what a jackass! I mean, if you did something illegal, would you tell Mike Wallace about it? I wouldn't. Ever notice how annoying my voice is? Of course, you can turn it off. I can't. Ever notice it gets dark at night? Where does the sun go? Nobody knows. Ever notice how much rouge I have on my cheeks? Of course, some people think it makes me look like a clown.
[He continues over the applause as the "A FEW MINUTES WITH ANDY ROONEY" title fades back in]
WEIRD! Here's last night's segment, because this was all just an excuse to put it up in case anyone missed it: we should all watch Andy every week while we still have him:
The Joe Piscopo shoe sketch isn't online, but I did find this one of JP RAPPING as Andy Rooney from a 1984 HBO special. (It's terrible, but here! Happy birthday.)
Posted by Lindsay at 2:15 PM in Sketch Comedy
Tags: Andy Rooney | Joe Piscopo | Saturday Night Live | Shoes
When I'm old I plan on being drunk all day. This is what I like to imagine is up with Andy Rooney.
Score = 15
1981??
Were you even born??
Score = -5
Let's see...what happened in 1981. Well, there was - nope, not born.
Score = 10
I honestly can't think of anything to say, and I don't have any pictures to post like the rest of Videogum, so I'm just going to say: What?
Score = -9
WHY AM I NOT AS TALL AS I USED TO BE?!
Score = 12
that was a rerun stupid you should have blogged about this a year ago
Score = -20
True - this entire episode of 60 Minutes plagiarized itself from an identical episode MONTHS AGO!
Score = 14
Yes, it was, which is how I found the SNL transcript, which was the point. duh.
Score = 13
i bet you have wicked bitch face. like all the time
Score = -1
Mike and the Bots have an Andy Rooney-off on the SOL. Mike is clearly the best.
Score = 0
HTML is new and scary to me. Proper link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8BZg8Qz980E
Score = 5
Finally, a poignant thought from Andy Rooney!
Score = 1
I hate it when the shoe people spend all their time working for the google and the apple. They should be making my shoes! Computer shoes!
Score = 8
Spoofed in 1981. Andy's been doing this for nearly 30 years. Think about that. Thirty years of stream-of-consciousness complaints. I can't decide whether this is enraging or admirable.
Score = 11
"I don't like to complain all that time, but that's what I do for a living, and I'm lucky, because there's so much to complain about."
Not everyone is as self-aware as our dear Andy.
Score = 7
"Recently, the people who make sneakers have been doing a better job than the people who make shoes."
But...but....sneakers ARE shoes!!!!
Score = 4
Two things could make Andy Rooney's life infinitely better: a custom-made pair of shoes and an eyebrow wax.
Score = 4
"Noone has two feet that are exactly the same size, but when you buy a pair of shoes, they're both the same!"
Andy, my feet are the same size. Buy some Scholl's pads or something.
Score = 3
He has my dream.
Score = 0
Dream job: 60 Minutes field producer in charge of shooting Andy Rooney B-roll of shoe stores.
Or prop master. For all of those shoes.
Score = 3
This pretty much my grandpa, except that HIS weird ramblings are in Spanish.
Score = 5
I never finished Dante's inferno, but I'm pretty sure Andy Rooney shoots this segment in some mild level of hell.
Score = 3
i love thinking about the fact that a 60 minutes cameraman probably waited around to get the shot of like five pairs of feet all wearing sneakers.
Score = 1
It's like that old chestnut says: if you handcuff Andy Rooney to a typewriter in a room with 100 monkeys, they will eventually produce the complete works of Shakespeare, plus a mediocre piece of 30-year-old sketch comedy. You will want to wear gloves.
Score = 1
Andy Rooney was exposed as a fraud by Ali-G. He's supposed to be a satirist but didn't get it and certainly couldn't handle it when he was the butt of the satire.
Plus, he's a racialist!
Score = 0
Also, the best Andy Rooney skit on SNL was the one he did on tits.
Google that one.
Score = 0
SARAH PALIN 2012! DOWN WITH SOCIALISM! DETHRONE THE KENYAN USURPER IN THE WHITE HOUSE!!!!
Score = 0
Sarah Palin isn't too much brighter than George W. Bush, becides, who wants a quiter in the White House?
Score = 0
Sarah Palin isn't too much brighter than George W. Bush, becides, who wants a quiter in the White House?
Score = 0