The Real World: One Creep Down, Six Creeps To Go
We've been one creep short for the past couple weeks while Joey was in rehab, but at the start of last night's episode he returned, bringing us back to the full Voltron of seven creeps. Joey's drinking problem took up most of the show, again, and while it's hard for any non-alcoholic to understand the struggle an addict goes through, it's particularly difficult for not particularly bright 20 somethings whose need for attention is only eclipsed by their need for free well drinks at whatever bar thinks this show provides good publicity. Every five minutes was another montage of the roommates getting drunk while Joey complained that no one loves him while casually checking to make sure his biceps were still 17" around. And while it was true that the roommates seemed mostly insensitive to Joey's situation, I'm pretty sure Dave was totally looking out for Joey's best interests when Joey pulled out a sheet of pills from his suitcase and Dave asked what they were and Joey told him they were bi-polar medication and Dave said "aw, don't worry about that stuff, dude." I would like to prove to Dave how effective bi-polar medication can be by giving him the bi-polar medication of my FISTS.
The roommates also performed their first improv show, which is their job this season. Thankfully, the editors never show a complete scene, or even a complete sentence. They just cut away to stock footage of people gently laughing, probably taken from a night when the roommates—who call themselves Whiskey Tango Foxtrot, or WTF, because Mixed Nuts was already taken—weren't even there. Performing makes Joey nervous because he doesn't think he's ready. But also he wants to be an actor? And he's really nervous about messing up? At improv? I'm pretty sure when you get on stage at an improv show you've already messed up. He thinks that if he messes up at the show it will harm his career? Because being an alcoholic mess on a reality TV show about living nightmares is going to open doors. Remember when Al Pacino got his start on Road Rules? And he's pretty good at acting, so my bad. Joey's right.
The other story, though, and the one that counts, is that this season's villain, Greg, misses performing improv to attend another fashion show, and learns the hard way that Charna Halpern "does not play."
Ouch. The only thing more embarrassing than getting kicked off a reality show by your improv teacher would be getting fired from your job as a candy reviewer. Greg pleads his case, which is mostly "How about I don't go home." Pretty smart. If I'm ever in trouble with the law, I'm going to hire Greg as my attorney. "Your honor, nunh-unh." When he heads back to the Real World compound to pack his knives, he calls his mom who can't believe that her bundle of garbage got kicked off the show just for breaking the contract he signed that clearly outlined his responsibilities towards completing the assigned tasks. Man, improv, you guys. So hard. Such a hard thing to attend regularly twice a week. That's one of the main reasons that people become doctors and physicists and soldiers is just so that they don't have to go to improv class twice a week.
Next week: Joey has a drinking problem more.
Posted by Gabe at 3:27 PM in Reality TV
Tags: Brianna Taylor | Charna Halpern | Creeps | David Malinosky | Greg Halstead | Hollywood | Joey Kovar | Kimberly Alexander | Sarah Ralston | The Real World | William Gilbert
The great pains you take to make yourself watch this only proves to produce quality humorous reading material. I had no idea the "tortured artist" template applied to blogging in a literal sense, but you've proven it possible.
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