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July 2, 2009

Holy Shit, You Guys, Let's All Agree To Never Get Parkinson's

Yikes! That looks terrible. I don't want to live like that. Do you? Some private Ed-Norton-in-that-one-office-scene-in-Fight-Club nightmare, and it's not even some quietly triumphant anti-authoritarian "fuck you" to the boss you hated, it's just you being old and wanting to get the phone. And expensive! I didn't realize that you broke coffee tables every time the phone rang when you suffered from Parkinson's when your evil doppelganger clotheslined you to the ground! I probably just wouldn't have a coffee table. Or drink tea. I'm making light of a very serious situation because it's the only way I know how to deal with the very real human suffering that exists around us on a daily basis!

No, this won't do. Let's all agree not to get this thing. Let's shake on it. Good. Phew. (Via AdFreak.)

Posted by Gabe at 3:00 PM in
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22 Comments

gab, now dat linsey betrade you you shood let me be da new linsey???

Posted by: Pistachio Disguisey profile link at 07/02/09 3:09 PM  | Reply
Score = 56 Vote up Vote down

If you, fine fellow, are saying that lindsey's critique is equivalent to a monkey with a gun then how dare you sir. How. Dare. You.

Posted by: Leo  in reply to  Pistachio Disguisey's comment at 07/02/09 4:19 PM  | Reply
Score = 2 Vote up Vote down

welcom bak!
i misd yu.

Posted by: yay  in reply to  Pistachio Disguisey's comment at 07/02/09 5:29 PM  | Reply
Score = 7 Vote up Vote down

US Parkinson's wouldn't be as violent, though.
us Canucks, on the other hand, love hockey--hence, Parkinson's Fight Club. you weren't supposed to see that.

ps. brilliant ad.

Posted by: alull profile link at 07/02/09 3:11 PM  | Reply
Score = 6 Vote up Vote down

So we're in agreement then? Da Cake Eatur is the new Lindsey?

Posted by: Mustafa profile link at 07/02/09 3:18 PM  | Reply
Score = 16 Vote up Vote down

I concur. Since there can't possibly be a worthy follow-up of Lindsay, let's go full-retard!

Posted by: Rick Brands can't post comments  in reply to  Mustafa's comment at 07/02/09 3:25 PM  | Reply
Score = 39 Vote up Vote down

Shake on it? I see what you did there.

Posted by: Dumbelina at 07/02/09 3:26 PM  | Reply
Score = 19 Vote up Vote down

Man, I just reread all the LOST recaps from this season and you know what I miss? Gabe. Man it really is a shame that guy was fired.
What happened? He was so funny.

Posted by: daniel at 07/02/09 4:00 PM  | Reply
Score = 6 Vote up Vote down

Man, I just reread all the LOST recaps from this season and you know what I miss? Gabe. Man it really is a shame that guy was fired.
What happened? He was so funny.

Posted by: daniel at 07/02/09 4:02 PM  | Reply
Score = -2 Vote up Vote down

If you, fine fellow, are saying that lindsey's critique is equivalent to a monkey with a gun then how dare you sir. How. Dare. You.

Posted by: Leo at 07/02/09 4:16 PM  | Reply
Score = -6 Vote up Vote down

Is this the part where we all drink the koolaid and kill ourselves?

Posted by: Jenn profile link at 07/02/09 4:20 PM  | Reply
Score = 3 Vote up Vote down

I just wanna log in and make funny comment

Posted by: Professor Push-Ups profile link at 07/02/09 4:35 PM  | Reply
Score = 3 Vote up Vote down

I don't understand the purpose of this ad, but I won't beat myself up over it. Now, show me the ad for Overactive Bladder Society, Canada.

Posted by: freckle at 07/02/09 4:42 PM  | Reply
Score = -2 Vote up Vote down

That reminds me of yet another horrifying Canadian PSA, one I saw just this morning: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fd9mYniAXAg

Posted by: Ashley just wants to be logged the fuck in at 07/02/09 5:16 PM  | Reply
Score = 1 Vote up Vote down

CRIMINY! Uhhh does everyone in Canada have horribly debilitating TERRIFYING medical conditions?

Posted by: zik at 07/02/09 5:30 PM  | Reply
Score = 0 Vote up Vote down

Jesus. I'd hate to see what happens when Canadians get herpes.

Posted by: theillegiblebastard profile link at 07/03/09 2:51 AM  | Reply
Score = 1 Vote up Vote down

"Let's shake on it"? I guess you (or do I mean "you guys," since we're all buddies on here?) don't have any relatives who have died a long, drawn out death from this disease. LOL, internet! Way to go, Gabe!

Posted by: Tate at 07/03/09 8:05 AM  | Reply
Score = 0 Vote up Vote down

I second that emotion.

Posted by: Cindy  in reply to  Tate's comment at 07/03/09 12:08 PM  | Reply
Score = 0 Vote up Vote down

Now, generally I'm quite proud of my prudishness, but I don't think Gabe's joke was really all that tasteless. Really, he had the whole world of Parkinson-related humor before him, and that's what he went with.

Anyway, humor is how you deal with this stuff. I've lost many close family members to cancer, and I'm still all for a good (as in, simple, subtle, etc.) cancer joke.

Posted by: langford  in reply to  Tate's comment at 07/04/09 10:06 PM  | Reply
Score = 1 Vote up Vote down

Everyone watch this with 'Ulysses' by Franz Ferdinand playing in the background. It's so intense!

Also, I can't sign in!

Posted by: Elvis vs. Shark at 07/03/09 1:45 PM  | Reply
Score = 1 Vote up Vote down

This video attempts to capture the experience of bradykinesia, which literally means "slow movement." It's the most disabling feature of Parkinson's, affecting the person's every move. I don't believe the experience causes physical pain, so the video would have been perhaps been more accurate if it showed the patient being pulled back instead of taking a barrage of punches. That being said, I'd imagine the experience would be as frustrating and humiliating as getting a virtually constant beat-down.

Posted by: bandofrogues profile link at 07/03/09 11:26 PM  | Reply
Score = 0 Vote up Vote down

My bad; i just watched the video again and he is being constantly pulled back.

Posted by: bandofrogues profile link  in reply to  bandofrogues's comment at 07/03/09 11:29 PM  | Reply
Score = -1 Vote up Vote down

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