The United States Of Tara: "Well, Smell Me"
I have a sort of fantasy about this show, where I keep sticking with it even after everyone has stopped watching, recapping, or talking about it, and it suddenly gets AMAZING and I'm like "Slow and steady wins the recap race!" But so far, even though episode four ("Inspiration") had Real Tara the whole time and only an alter flashback and (spoiler) evidence of a possible act committed by an alter, it was still ridiculous. Sigh. Let's go.
Tara catches Max masturbating in the shower. Okay, that's a plot that's done in movies and on TV all the time. American Beauty, much? For anyone under the age of 75, this doesn't seem like a conflict. But she makes a joke, calling it "Gentleman's Time," and this joke is repeated several times because she keeps being worried about it. "Gentleman's Time" is not going to happen. Stop trying to make "Gentleman's Time" happen.
Tara makes a friend -- her sister's coworker at the Amway Vitamin Pyramid Scheme company who has hired her to paint a terrible pastel mural on her wall for some reason. Here is Tara telling her shrink about her new friend. Notice that the shrink talks about Tara's (faaake) condition as being a "system" that was "set up" to "protect" Tara from the trauma that happened in her life that she doesn't remember:
"Well, smell me!" What? Who would say that to their shrink?
Later, Tara's sister casually mentions that Tara's trauma was "She had sex with someone at boarding school that she didn't want to have sex with." Sure. I don't want to dismiss the trauma of having had sex with someone at boarding school or anywhere else that you didn't want to have sex with, but if this is true, why doesn't Charmie tell her all about it? This episode is all about how Tara can't remember, but hasn't she had people around her who will remember for her? Was I allowing my eyes to unfocus while staring at the wall next to the TV when they told us that Tara grew up completely alone, raised by wolves? (I'm legitimately asking: that happens a lot with this show.)
Anyway, its also really messed up that the daughter teases the son about his crushes in front of their parents, but I can't express it better than Claire Zulkey over at The AV Club, so here's what she said:
I guess we're supposed to know that the family is cool and liberal but it would seem just gross though if Marshall were straight and Katie were talking about him chasing pussy in front of her parents.
Exactly. Katie's jokes are not a step forward for mankind. They're just gross.
Anyway, at least this episode ended with a genuine mystery: Tara's new friend's mural is vandalized with the words "Yuppie Cunt" and Tara was the only one with the key, so she's served with a restraining order. So did one of her alters do it? And what does that have to do with Tara's trauma?
One thing is certain: by the end of this season, Max will have sex with one of the alters, and the brouhaha over it will be boring. (My guess: Alice, and she gets pregnant, but that's so "duh" by now that maybe they'll throw us for a loop. But almost certainly not.)
Posted by Lindsay at 5:53 PM in Prime Time Soap Operas
Tags: Diablo Cody | Jon Corbett | The United States Of Tara | Toni Collette
Diablo Cody would toooootally say "smell me" to her shrink. Other than that, nobody, ever.
Score = 6
The most ridiculously unrealistic thing about this show is that Patton Oswalt plays a landscaper. That guy hasnt been out in the sunshine for more than five minutes since 1987.
Score = 4
The A/V Club has decided to stop reviewing this show. I'm glad y'all are still up for the challenge. I can't wait to see how ridiculous this shit is (inevitably) going to get. I mean, four episodes and we've already seen a shirtless baby Lawrence brother, Patton Oswalt and a gratuitous masturbation scene.
Diablo Cody is seriously messing with us, guys.
Score = 1
oh man, that was so bad. you just convinced me to never watch this show.
Score = 0
I hope another person wrote Yuppie Cunt and the show can change into a show about them.
Score = 4
Yuppie Cunt would make a great show. A cross between Ally McBeal and Borderline Personality Disorder. Plucky SWF trying to make in the city while managing her chaotic and unstable behavioral disorder. I'm sold, make it happen Showtime!
Score = 1
I was wondering when the show would address the fact that DID is caused by long term childhood abuse (most often sexual in nature) and how this was supposed to be funny. Guess I can stop wondering and start asking the real question at hand, that being: WTF DIABLO CODY?! WTF?!
Score = 1