Look, let's be real for once. Regardless of who you voted for in the last election--John McCain or that TERRORIST--or which political party you believe has the best ideas to lead our country through the converging tidal waves of 2012, there is one person who emerged during last fall's historic election about whom none of us should be confused: Sarah Palin. Political ideologies, economic models of communal or individual prosperity, and virulent hatred of certain minority groups' desire to be in love with each other aside, that woman is one of the worst assholes in the entire world. Period. When it comes to that, we are purple*! So what is concerning about yesterday's interview on The Oprah Winfrey Show is not so much having to look at this animatronic nightmare's face spewing some of the worst lies anyone has ever heard, although that is difficult, but it was the simple legitimacy that Oprah's extended interview with her offered to the concept that she is a normal human being who deserves attention and dignity and respect. Nope!
It comes as no surprise that the right is trying to use Obama's win of the Nobel Peace Prize this morning against him. Fair enough! I mean, I don't really understand how that works, but I recognize and understand that many people do not like him, did not vote for him, and do not agree with his policies, and as such it must be difficult to see his winning the Nobel Peace Prize as anything other than further proof that the world has gone Upside-Downsies. "If they're going to give him one, then they should give George W. Bush a Nobel Public Speaking Prize. He was the best. I wish he was my dad." That was just a reductive and completely baseless journey into the mind of a caricature of a right wing voter. Sorry.
But seriously, Rush Limbaugh? An embarrassment?! I could understand claiming that Barack Obama doesn't deserve a Nobel Peace Prize, but how on Earth do you call winning a Nobel Peace Prize an EMBARRASSMENT?! Looks like someone had an Oxycontin for breakfast.
Other things that Rush Limbaugh considers to be equally or LESS embarrassing than winning a Nobel Peace Prize:
With a health-care reform song set to a Miley Cyrus song.
Um, obviously the kids from the Ron Clark Academy are great, and even though I liked their cover of T.I.'s "Whatever You Like" more than I like anything Miley Cyrus has ever done ever, or anything related to or based off of anything she has done, this is still pretty solid. But what was that one kid talking about at the beginning? He is against public health care because of what it will do to rich people? That is some Lil Bill O'Reilly shit right there is what that is. (Thanks for the tip, Matthew.)
I'm so sorry. I should have known that Wellford's mayor, Sallie Peake, was not your mayor. Obviously, East Cleveland's mayor, Eric Brewer, currently involved in a cross-dressing-photo scandal just days before the election, is your mayor. (Via Dlisted.)
You know that you should tell your parents that you voted for her, but it just hasn't seemed like the right time. It's not that you're scared of what they'll say, your parents have always supported you, but you don't want to see that quiet disappointment in their eyes. "But she makes ridiculous, unsustainable policies without the logical reasoning skills to back them up. She has attempted to literally cut the legs out from under our police department without clearly understanding what that would mean for the safety of the town. And she is saucy and combative with the press," they will say. "I mean, a 'no running' policy?" your mother will say. "What is that?" You will shake your head. "It's a no chasing policy, mom." She will look down. "All the same." There will be a pregnant pause. "Well, she's mine, and I love her," you will say. And then everyone will push the food around their plates in stone silence until someone, probably your dad, changes the subject.
Soon! You'll tell them soon. Just not tonight. (Thanks for the tip, Octavis.)
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