"Hello, hospital? Send an ambulance, please. And a bucket. Also, do you know how to fix eyes that have been clawed out with fingers? What's that? No, they were my fingers. I'm assuming I have the eyes somewhere, I just can't see them hahahha. They're probably on the floor though. Or in this puddle of bar--yeah, found them!"
Posted by Gabe at 4:45 PM in Oh, Yuck!
Tags: Dreadlocks | No Slomo | Not OK | Yuck
Rip Torn's eyes would barely open and his face was a ravaged, haggard, stubbly mess. His chapped lips stuck together, and the pavement had left a red, mottled impression against his cheek. He looked around blearily, barely able to focus...
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You know, the truth is, I actually like romantic comedies. I am man enough to admit that. We all would love to live in a world of love and friendship and gentle laughter. Why not? You think I want it...
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In the future, when the ultra-light telepathic super-mecha, derived from the core technology of the Cybertronics "Real Boys" line of love children, are sifting through the ice wastes for any remnants of the long extinct human race that once created...
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The Challenge: I had to go on a 3.5 hour bus tour of totally random TV and film locations in New York City. Alone, and wearing a specific ridiculous tshirt. And I had to find someone to take my picture...
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"Whoa." --Kebanu Roves It is weird that you can't do things normally in New York sometimes. Like, I'm so sorry that I ate an early dinner before going to see Avatar on Friday night the way that a HUMAN BEING...
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Gabe, don't be so embarrassed of this video of you...Lots of people had Korn phases!
Score = 21
More like "Grow No Mo'" !
Score = 1
Now if those dreads had been lit on fire beforehand, this would've been an awesome follow up to the Spike Jonze-directed Wax video for "California." Obviously because it would be a slo-mo video of a white guy getting his dreads lit on FIRE, and rightly so.
This was just bad. Fuck everyone involved with this project.
Score = 8
I can't believe anyone watched this long enough to barf.
I love that Wax video!
Score = 1
God I hate flux art.
Score = 2
Somewhere right now Adam Duritz is crying for his hair that will never be
Score = 7
MDMA moment: repeating patterns in nature have the same affect on me (e.g. beehives, etc).
Score = 0
Nahh, see that wasn't that bad. They look cared for, strong, etc...
That's bad.
Score = 10
Good fucking gawd, that looks like a hairsteak.
BLLEEEUUUARRRGGHHHHH!
Score = 21
i am honest to god nauseous now.
Score = 9
Geezzee, You could make a Incubus Snuggie out of that thing.
Score = 17
Holy cheesus, I have seen that hobo in Houston! (I am hoping so hard that Houston hobo in the only human in this world who looks like that that I am discounting the possibility that this could be someone else.)
Score = 1
oh god. the bread dread. i feel sick.
Score = 0
This is the greatest song ever written by anyone, EVER.
Score = 1
That is gross! (We're talking about the orange pants, right?)
Score = 13
This is what all of the shampoo commercials look like here in Portland, Oregon.
Score = 21
Sometimes I brave the yuppies in the Pearl just so I don't feel awkward about having bathed that day.
Score = 2
this is similar to the reason i watch cops (so that i no longer feel the urge to clean my house)
Score = 4
I kept thinking of him at Thanksgiving dinner, and it was pretty depressing. Not just the fact that I'm sure his mother would start crying at some point while he insisted loudly that he was living art, but because it would not be fun for his family to be constantly excusing themselves to go throw up throughout the course of their meal.
Score = 4
It's funny, just this morning I thought to myself "I wonder what's up with the lead singer from P.O.D.?" and now I know!
Score = 1
Is this anything?
Score = 8
In the third grade i seriously considered getting dreadlocks (I liked ani difranco, okay?). I've never been more happy that i didn't.
Score = 2
Ugh, Gabe, you're like the old ladies on the subway who make a show of angrily brushing three strands of my long hair off their static charged coats. I don't want to sit next to you either!
Score = 8
I don't know. I think it could've stood to be just a little bit slower. I was really hoping to spend the whole last half-hour of work watching prehistoric hair-worms inching across my computer screen.
Score = 17
Seriously, I started the video, got grossed out, scrolled down and read through all the comments and when I went back up the hair was only halfway finished flipping! There needs to be a limit to how slo you can mo.
Score = 12
That just made me sad. Though at the same time happy to be me. A whole lotta emotion right here.
Score = 3
My boyfriend is going to be so much famous. SO MUCH.
Score = 5
even color is trying to run away from this video
Score = 4
The thing is, how long did that mess take to grow? so he's either a douche for not listening to the people who love him who kept telling him over the years, "no. don't do this. please, we respect your individuality and your 'spirit' but please, please, think of your family and your future" or there is no one who loves him.
aww...now i'm sad AND covered with vomit.
Score = 2
the predator aint got nothing on him
Score = 0