Brown-Suit-Wearing Riders, Yellow-Shirted Bulls • The generally accepted best movie decade had a lot of overused themes: The Way Movies Were In the '70s.

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Can You Believe These Fucking Guys Were Batman?

Now that it's been more than a month since the release of The Dark Knight and we can step back and finally have some perspective on the phenomenon of the second highest grossing movie of all time, one thing has become really clear: it's amazing that the people who played Batman before did that. (The working title of this list was "FINALLY, AND NOT A MOMENT TOO SOON.") It's not even a question of "Who Was the Best Batman?" because that's obvious. It's Christian Bale. We all know that. It was the the cover story on last month's issue of Duh Aficionado magazine. But seriously, the other guys who played Batman? Can you believe these fucking guys?

Continue reading Can You Believe These Fucking Guys Were Batman?...

Posted by Gabe at 1:32 PM in Nostalgia
Tags: Adam West | Batman | Christian Bale | George Clooney | Michael Keaton | The Dark Knight | Val Kilmer

Comments (13) latest by dtrashed

Demanded Explanation: Bruno The Kid

In the courts of law there is a statute of limitations that defines that maximum amount of time that can pass after something occurs before it is brought to court. But this is e-court of the iNternet, and there is no statute of limitations on apologizing. Which is why I would like someone in Hollywood to make amends for the short-lived Bruce Willis animated series Bruno The Kid.

Yes, that is a CGI Bruce Willis face that is creeping you out. And YES, that is Bruce Willis singing the very bluesy intro. In the cartoon, which seems to be a frustrated reaction to the success of Life with Louie, Willis was the voice of Bruno, an 11-year-old boy, who is recruited by the top secret espionage organization, The Globe, who don't know he's 11 because he only talks to them via computer and uses the CGI Bruce Willis face to disguise himself as a lecherous 40 year old with a penchant for fedoras. No. This would all be bad enough if it was just some mis-managed attempt at creating a child's entertainment, but Bruno is actually Bruce Willis's artistic alter-ego. This cartoon was some kind of Bruce Willis wish-fulfillment being played out in the realm of children. And that is disgusting.

I have done extensive research and as far as I'm able to tell there has never been a public apology from either Mr. Willis or the President of Entertainment. America waits.

Posted by Gabe at 11:30 AM in Bad Idea Jeans, Nostalgia
Tags: Bruce Willis | Bruno The Kid | Demanded Explanation

Comments (6) latest by Parker

Baby Keanu Reeves Explores The Serious Side Of Teddy Bears

In 1984, a disturbingly already-adult-looking Keanu Reeves was a correspondent for a Canadian show called Going Great (great name, for real.) Here he is interviewing a kid who collects teddy bears, and being really really Canadian together:

Young Keanu reminds me of Alisdair on You Can't Do That On Television, who, whoa, is all grown up now, and bald! Thanks to Ben for the tip.

Posted by Lindsay at 10:00 AM in Nostalgia, Where Are They Now?, Where Were They Then?
Tags: Keanu Reeves | Teddy Bears

Comments (4) latest by DAN

Dave Coulier And Alanis Morissette Met At Nickelodeon And Proceeded To Have Sex

OH GROSS.

So I casually noticed a gossip item about Dave Coulier this morning, and without even reading it, it got me thinking about one of my favorite shows when I was a kid, Out of Control, which Coulier hosted. I wrote a whole post about what a great show it was and how it, along with You Can't Do That On Television, introduced a whole generation of young people to complicated post-modern narrative structures and also irony. But then I went back to look at the gossip item that triggered the whole thing, and discovered something horrifying.

The item, in US Weekly today, is Dave Coulier reminiscing about when he realized that Alanis Morissette's "You Oughtta Know" was about him. OK, that's hilarious, BUT, Alanis Morissette was on You Can't Do That On Television at the same time that Dave was hosting Out of Control. THEY MET ON THE NICKELODEON LOT, AND THEY BEGAN TO HAVE SEX. I need an adult.

Now, Alanis was on YCDTOT as a five-year-old in 1979, and then didn't return to the show until 1986, while Coulier's Out of Control aired in 1984. But that just seems like too much of a coincidence. They probably met at the Nickelodeon Christmas party or something. Wikipedia claims they met at a hockey game, I claim BULLSHIT. Jagged Little Pill came out in '95, when she was 21, and they had, clearly, already broken up. I'm going to give Coulier the benefit of the doubt and say that he did not sleep with an underage Morissette, but he definitely slept with an almost underage Morissette. Coulier is 15 years older than Morisette. Look, whatever Dave Coulier wants to do in his bedroom is his own business, but this whole revelation is like walking in on your parents having sex. If your parents had been involved with seminal children's shows.

Continue reading Dave Coulier And Alanis Morissette Met At Nickelodeon And Proceeded To Have Sex...

Posted by Gabe at 11:34 AM in Behind The Scenes, Nostalgia, Oh, Yuck!
Tags: Alanis Morissette | Dave Coulier | Full House | Nickelodeon | Out Of Control | You Can't Do That On Television

Comments (8) latest by Alanis Morissette

Doogie Howser, M.D. Is Now On Hulu

Yesterday I noticed that Hulu added a ton of full episodes of Doogie Howser, M.D. to their free library over the weekend. The show holds up surprisingly well, but the episode titles are hilarious. Like these:

"The Big Sleep...Not!"
"You've Come A Long Way, Babysitter"
"Doogie Doesn't Live Here Anymore"
"Double Doogie With Cheese"
"Doogiesomething"
"Lonesome Doog"
"Guess Who's Coming To Doogie's"

And my favorite:

"Doogie Got A Gun": When Doogie and Vinnie are robbed at gunpoint, Doogie decides to buy a gun for protection.

I love this dorky, movie-obsessed show.

Posted by Lindsay at 10:00 AM in Nostalgia, Sitcoms
Tags: Doogie Howser | M.D. | Neil Patrick Harris

Comments (3) latest by smashleigh

What Really Happened To Kevin Arnold After The Wonder Years

Jon Friedman, the creator of The Silent Wonder Years, which would be on any top-20 list of funniest things ever done with video on the internet, has finally created a follow-up that doesn't disappoint: Kevin is still living at home in his parent's basement, trying to explain "cool" to his 40-year-old housewife mother:

Jon should have to make one of these once a week. Nothing could ruin that show.

Posted by Lindsay at 11:16 AM in Movie Mashups, Nostalgia
Tags: Fred Savage | The Wonder Years

Comments (2) latest by Str8MurdaSon

Steve Guttenberg + Roller Skates + Disco = Awesome

Okay, ONE MORE Steve Guttenberg thing: apparently, this movie is incredibly famous and a camp classic bad movie and was the recipient of the first Golden Raspberry Awards (winning every category except Best Supporting Actor), but this is the first I've seen of Can't Stop The Music, the musical comedy that told the fake story of the Village People and was a gigantic bomb when it came out in 1980, except in Australia, where it did very well. All I know is, this intro starring Guttenberg on roller skates made my day:

I don't think the movie can get better than that intro. (Thanks to Jon for the tip!)

Posted by Lindsay at 12:00 PM in Nostalgia
Tags: Can't Stop The Music | Steve Guttenberg

Comments (3) latest by Genevieve