What Is Happening To Everyone's Face?
This is the movie poster for Jennifer Aniston's new romantic comedy, Management. Between this poster and the trailer, it seems to be a movie about the age old story of butt touching. (Oh great, another butt touching movie! SNORE!) But, um, what is up with Jennifer Aniston's face? As an American, I've been exposed to countless images of Jennifer Aniston's face, to the point where whether I like it or not, I feel fairly confident that I would recognize her in public, maybe even from up to a few feet away without my glasses, and I've never even met her (believe it). What's going on here? It's especially unfortunate since being the only face on the poster at all, it seems like Jennifer Aniston's face (well, and butt) are the main draws being used to get people to see the movie. Which is stupid, because Steve Zahn is great, and he actually looks really funny in this movie even if it does seem like he's gone full retard. Seriously, though, her face. What is up with it? That is not her. Who is that? Whose face is that?
And this coming just one day after those photos of Rupert Everett's new face. Did you see THAT shit? Bonkers:
(Via towleroad.) Hey Rupert Everett, my nightmares called. They want your new face back.
Jesus.
What is happening here? I mean, I know that what's happening is surgery, and/or Photoshop, but this is unacceptable. You only get one face, you guys. Treasure it. TREASURE YOUR FACE. The only time that you should ever even consider tampering with your face is in the pursuit of a deadly criminal when the only way to get information about the bomb he has hidden in the city is by using a risky experimental surgery to transfer his face to yours and using his face to trick his brother in prison into telling you what's what, and even then you will probably come to regret it. What if the clinic burns down? Too much hassle.
This guy knows:
Remember, you guys, FACE/ON. Always.
Posted by Gabe at 3:30 PM in Movie Posters
Tags: Jennifer Aniston | Management | Plastic Surgery | Rupert Everett | Steve Zahn
Thank you for reminding me how awesome Face/Off is.
Score = 19
New Rupert is kind of a dead ringer for Patrick Swayze circa Ghost.
Is Jen sticking her ass out in that poster? Or is it a slacks trick?
Score = 8
Eminem has a weird face now too. This is too creepy.
Score = 5
NIGHTMARES: http://www.buzzfeed.com/lindseyweber/whats-wrong-with-eminems-face-ru
Score = 5
Holy crap. Did he always have a snout?
Score = 0
I think he's wearing the Tom Cruise mask from "Vanilla Sky."
Score = 0
This is part of that trend of creepy movie posters that are Photoshopped to death and you can tell that no one was photographed at the same time. Yuck.
Before the jump, I was thinking "Why is Isla Fisher on that Jennifer Aniston movie poster?"
Score = 5
NIGHTMARES
Score = 12
He stole the last of Angela Landsbury's youth.
Score = 13
When is the appropriate time for men to have an eye lift, Rupert Everitt?
Never is the appropriate time for men to have an eye lift.
Jesus.
Score = 8
Walk into any nation-wide physical video store chain and scan their straight to DVD releases - you'll find many a photoshop-fucked actor/actress' visage distorted beyond recognition. There's an Anna Faris/Jon Heder movie that's a prime example of this (I think it's called Mama's Boy and it's not my favorite movie of all time, I swear).
P.S. Feel free to use the term "photoshop-fucked" but remember to always give me credit for it.
Score = 3
As Jennifer Aniston's lover (shutup, I'm an anonymous person on the interwebs-you can't disprove it), I can personally say that I did not recognize her. That butt, however, I recognized from every minivan in the country; it's a soccer-mom butt.
Score = 4
haha it's a 2003 soccermom joke! Cmon man they fuckin all drive SUVs and shit now. Upgrades man, get on the upgrades.
Score = -5
I know what that movie should have been called.
Box office death.
Score = 2
Can we talk about steve zahn's butt in the photo? I could bounce a quarter off of that! I could use it as a bookshelf! That thing is out there.
Score = 4
Agreed. This freaked me out than her face. I'd like to see an x-ray of his spine. Instead of an elongated S, it probably looks like an L.
Score = 1
Don't forget EMINEM'S new face -- which give will nightmares forever.
http://www.buzzfeed.com/lindseyweber/whats-wrong-with-eminems-face-ru
Score = 0
Oh come on, Jennifer Aniston is totally asking for her butt to be touched in that business casual outfit, how could you resist?
Score = 5
Who designed that poster? I'm more confused as to why they are standing in (amd staring into?) empty blue space.
Score = 3
initially when i saw the title lettering, i thought it was a baby movie. but then i realized that maybe instead of baby blocks, the lettering was designed to [inexplicably] look like scrabble letters.
Score = 3
i also like the butt cleavage that those strangely teal jeans provide
Score = 1
I tried to find something redeemable about this poster, but I just couldn't.
Score = 2
Her eyebrows are like those freaky ladies who draw their eyebrows on. WHAT HAVE THEY DONE TO YOU JEN?
Score = 1
Above all I will remember to TREASURE MY FACE!
Score = 0