Uh Oh, We Missed Global Hand Washing Day
Wait, Global Hand Washing Day was YESTERDAY?! How could we have missed it?! I would totally have washed my hands at some point yesterday, if only I had known. You would think that the traditional Global Hand Washing Day Dance would have helped remind us better.
Doot-de-doot-de-doot-de-doo, says the magical soap hand cloud drop man! (LOOK OUT, SNIPER FIRE!)
Goddamned Bubble Boy. This is his fault. First he caused the international economic collapse, then he hid in the attic "for the show," and now this. WELL DONE, BUBBLE BOY. Bubble Boy ruins everything. (Thanks for the tip, Jessica.)
Posted by Gabe at 4:00 PM in Good Idea Jeans
Tags: Global Hand Washing Day | Health | United Nations
This dance will be mandated if we submit to world governance. America will stand alone against this if we must.
Score = 6
This man is clearly MY boyfriend, not yours, so keep your grubby hands off of him. Don't be jealous of our love. He clearly has excellent hygiene, is good with kids, and is a snappy dresser. What else could I ask for in a man? I am calling my mom to let her know when the wedding is. After I wash my hands, of course.
Score = 6
OMFG. STOP READING MY MIND!!!! Get out of my head, Gabe! GET OUT OF MY HEAD! Srsly. It was ma birfday yesterday [pls send presents to ....jkjkjkjk] and so I wiki'ed that shit and came up with this and have been joking about it all of like, well it feels like forever, now that Global Handwashing Day and I have been Lots of Love Pals. And now this? And why am I only now finding out about this balloon boy? WTF, Internet? I miss one day on Videogum and I'm the new kid in class all over again.
Score = -3
It was my birthday too! And Tito Jackson and Penny Marshall's. You know, all the kool kidz.
Score = 5
Yay!!! But of cooooooourse you are a Libra, you witty darling thing you. Happy bday to ya! I'm still drunk. You? (JKs all around) Also, Virgil, Nietzche (barf), and Fela Anikulapo Kuti. Good company, that. But srsly, Global Handwashing Day? Shouldn't...that, like, be...every? Day? H1N1, People!
Score = 3
I bet if we could sell the Vatican we could washy washy washy the world's hands!
Score = 0
That was a dumb idea when sarah silverman appeared on her boyfriend(Bill Maher)'s show with that video that all the liberal fuckwits with more skinny jeans then brains love.
Seriously, who is buying the fucking vatican?
Score = -6
Why did he touch those kids after washing his hands? He has no idea where they've been. ALSO, and this is super important, where did he get that soap? Did you see that lather!?! Where do you get soap that lathers like that? That's some magical soap right there.
Score = 7
You really do not want to know. Hint: not soap.
Score = 6
Wow. I was at a concert yesterday and the two girls next to me were slathering antibacterial rub all over their hands nonstop. I was annoyed that they were invading my sense of smell throughout the show, but now it all makes sense. Although it wasn't hand washing, you are forgiven, Purell girls.
Score = 4
Score = -4
H1N1 Love to all my fake colored blackface and paleface alike
Score = 1
Bootcha bootcha bootcha bootcha bootcha bootcha boo
Score = 0
At last! I've found this year's halloween costume.
Score = 2
They didn't have this one in the Stranger video. Clean Hands Trap.
Score = 4
AguaAguaAgua! Haha, some months ago, while H1N1 came into our lives, my father learned all those hand washing techniques and thought it was a lot of fun. So I guess now I have to send this to him...
Don't judge me! Your dad would love it too.
Score = 2
as someone with ocd, i thought my hand washing was excessive...
Score = 0
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Score = -1
that was beautiful and inspiring
Score = 0
You really showed all of those people who aren't dying from easily-prevented diseases with your snark. You must feel super cool and good about yourselves. Way to shit on the charirty, winners.
Score = -1
HIGH FIVE!
Score = 0