I have some very exciting news for the entertainers of Hollywood. The sadness and embarrassment you feel when trying to revitalize a waning career will no longer be that bad because now you'll always have the work of Chuck Woolery as a benchmark of sadness by which to compare yourself. "Oh," you will say to your friends and publicists, "I may be playing the same character I played 20 years ago and for way less money, but at least I'm not hosting the Meow Mix Game Show." Reuters:
Game-show veteran Chuck Woolery will host "The Meow Mix Game Show," a cat-centered competition that will air on GSN on November 15.
The half-hour program, in which cats and humans compete for the chance to win $1 million and earn $100,000 for their local feline-related charity, will put a twist on classic game shows like "The Newlywed Game" and "Jeopardy!"
Owners will be quizzed on general feline knowledge, covering such categories as nutrition, behavior, anatomy and the role of cats in pop culture. The competition also will feature interactive challenges in which cats and humans must work together to succeed.
This is mostly just an unfair jab to the floating ribs of Woolery's career. The man is just trying to get through the day and put food on his table and here I am making fun of him. Well, that's how boxing works. Jab jab jab. As far as the actual show is concerned, I will obviously watch this show, at least once. Because it looks insane/retarded and I love seeing cats and humans work together to succeed.
Everyone feels dumber in summer, so here's a reminder that there are people even dumber than us, appearing as contestants on the least challenging game show, Wheel Of Fortune. Don't those shows require tests of basic reading skills? I doubt this guy Kevin is, as billed, the "dumbest Wheel Of Fortune contestant ever," but he definitely doesn't know what words mean:
Poor Kevin. He thought he'd be "Dangling on air." The butterscotch cookies incident was, at least, just unlucky.
Before he edited Deadspin.com and wrote God Save The Fan: (Longest Subtitle Ever), sports blogger Will Leitch had an online column (and later, book) called Life As A Loser. The genesis of the column was Will's disastrous appearance on the Comedy Central game show Win Ben Stein's Money in the Spring of '97, the night before which young Will was unceremoniously dumped by his fiance. So co-host Jimmy Kimmel asked him about it. On the show. And then Will did what Kimmel called "The worst Woody Allen impression (he's) ever seen." In honor of Will's last week at Deadspin (he's moving on to New York Magazine), I present the most embarrassing video skeleton I've seen yet, which is finally, mercifully online: Will Leitch on Win Ben Stein's Money.
The Moment Of Truth, Fox's terrible lie-detector game show, is now appearing as two edited down clips on Hulu the morning after it airs. What this means is that these two clips are basically the entire show with just the long pauses, repetition and commercial breaks taken out. This volunteer fire fighter is also an arsonist:
This Mormon EMT hates fat people and doesn't think his girlfriend is hot:
Oh, and turns out he does care about Darfur. When the ratings start to sag, The Moment Of Truth should start doing shows entirely around social issues like racism and sexism. You know, to speed up the end of the world.
This promo for tonight's Moment Of Truth skips past the now-boring relationship-ruining questions and cuts to the heart of the west's apathy toward crises in other parts of the world. Holy shit, they ask a dude whether he really cares about Darfur!?!:
It's amazing that this "depressing" question got past the network, but notice that he asks about the "famine" in Darfur, not the, you know, genocide. Yes, there is a famine, but this seems like the softball version of the question. On the one hand, they're using the suffering of others to humiliate someone for our entertainment. On the other, if this horrible show raises just one person's awareness of Darfur, maybe it's worth it. Tune in tonight to see if that guy really gives a shit.
FOX's Moment of Truth returns to television tonight, and if this preview clip is any indication, it's another victory for fans of homophobia.
"Oh man, I am so nervous. I hope my best friend isn't a homo. That would be such horrible news. He probably has a huge crush on me and it's only his respect for the boundaries of our friendship, which probably means a lot to him because he's so gay, that has kept him from anally raping me, which is what all the gays do, I know it. I hate him. I hate him no matter what the answer is. Look at his girlfriend. She's so nervous too because she's about to be made to look like someone who loves gay people. She is gay. I hate her for helping him to fool me into thinking he wasn't gay, which he is, which is so gross. The real question now is not whether or not my former-best-friend has lived in fear of my close-minded hatred towards homosexuals for decades to the point of keeping his true self hidden from me, but whether or not through my careless friendships I have unwittingly supported the idea that homosexuals were equals in our society and should not be judged by their sexual orientation, which they should. My only hope at this point is that the FOX broadcasting network will have the courage to use this homophobic clip to promote the show so that more people can see this and understand how horrible gay people are when they tell you they are gay for the first time."
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