One Week Is A Gay Retard
Remember One Week? The most highly-anticipated movie about Joshua Jackson wearing a pre-distressed leather jacket by a lake with his thumbs tucked casually into his pockets like he didn't just buy that motorcycle out of trite existential panic at his approaching death? Also known as Your Movie? Someone at StreetCarnage found this Canadian newspaper ad for it made entirely out of glowing or at least grammatically correct YouTube comments! LOL! Lots Of Love! Some of my favorite Professional Movie Critic Quotes about this exciting new film:
"DAMN THIS LOOKS GOOD."
-17VampireCrystal"Yeah...and he looks good."
-PatFairbairn"I am definitely going to watch this."
-PuttyDutty123
Good quotes. Very critical. I cannot wait for the new season of Ebert and 17VampireCrystal.
(Click through for larger image.)
Posted by Gabe at 12:00 PM in Everyone's A Critic
Tags: Joshua Jackson | One Week | YouTube Commenters
You mean a gaytard??
Score = 3
Finally Canada gets the respect it deserves.
"He's so awesome and Canadian!"
Indeed.
Score = 7
This is the pinnacle of my Facebook posting career:
Seriously? There is a movie about rolling up the rim of a Tim Hortons cup and 'going west'? And Joshua Jackson is in it? And he smugly tells tourists 'he knows' that Canada is beautiful? Seriously Canada?
How much did Tim Hortons pay for this? Wait - the saddest part of this is that they probably didn't...
You know why Canadian's are wracked by a national insecurity complex? It's because we are not as cool and hip as we say we are (and we all secretly know it).
Seriously, fuck Canadians. Fuck'em.
Garneau theatre - I hate you for playing this.
One Week Trailer
Source: www.tribute.ca
One WeekTrailer
March 12 at 11:08am · Comment · Like · Share
Score = -6
Alex Coombes Seriously? There is a movie about rolling up the rim of a Tim Hortons cup and 'going west'? And Joshua Jackson is in it? And he smugly tells tourists 'he knows' that Canada is beautiful? Seriously Canada?
How much did Tim Hortons pay for this? Wait - the saddest part of this is that they probably didn't...
You know why Canadians are wracked by a national insecurity complex? It's because we are not as cool and hip as we say we are (and we all secretly know it).
Seriously, fuck Canadians. Fuck'em.
Garneau theatre - I hate you for playing this.
Score = -15
This can't be real. Even us Canadians aren't that effusive about Canadian movies.
Score = 5
As a current Canadian/former New Yorker, you wouldn't believe how weirdly jingoistic Canadian is in its adverts. Nearly every one makes sure you know no filthy, sickly, racist American hands were involved in this product. And paradoxically how apeshit Canada goes when it is acknowledged by America. How I Met Your Mother is basically a national treasure.
"Canada! We are different than America.".
Score = 12
I like how they couldn't decide between the quotes from LizzieCharm and used both.
Score = 5
Sound the "OLD NEWS" siren! This one's been aging like a fine wine for almost a month now!
http://www.slashfilm.com/2009/03/07/lol-marketing-for-new-joshua-jackson-movie-uses-quotes-from-youtube/
Score = 0
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w3b_uudRFkU
Canadians love seven day time spans.
Score = 4
Also, in the late 90s when I was in junior high I took a trip to Toronto, and we saw some movie at an IMAX theater. Before the movie they had a small laser light show about the invention of the IMAX camera. The music stopped and the announcer's voice became very deep, and he said: "And best of all..." At this point a laser maple leaf was broadcast of the screen. "It's Canadian!!!" I kid you not the entire theater went nuts and the music came back in twice as loud as before.
Score = 12
Dude they still show that overly ridiculous Imax intro to this day. It's fucking hilarious.
Score = 7
I lol'd at the fact that the trip advertised is to an American locale.
Score = -4
I lol'd at the fact you think the Rockies just get tired and stop at the America-Canada border.
Score = 18
My mistake. I will vote myself down.
Score = 4
Gord Downie? Parents can be so cruel.
Score = 0
Gord Downie is the lead singer of tragically hip.
Score = 0
How do they know those commenters are Canadian when none of their posts end with "eh", eh?
Score = 7
What the heck?!? Am I having da ja vous? I swear you already posted about that ad a while ago.
Score = 0
i am having the same feeling. at least i am not alone in losing my mind.
Score = 1
"Gay Retard?" Really? What are we Gabe, twelve? Not cool.
Score = -8
"this will suck"
-Johnny
Score = 7
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Irony
Score = 1
That was for keith.
Score = 0
"ALL OF CANADA IS TALKING ABOUT ONE WEEK"
I counted 19 people talking about it. All 19 people in Canada.
Score = 3
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Prejudice
That was for Carrie.
Score = -4
This movie is terrible. It's Canada from the perspective of Toronto, aka those assholes who have no idea what Canada is. Thanks, Torontonian assholes.
BTW, I'm being nice because my cousin wrote it*. It's actually way worse than terrible.
*Approximately 2/3 of Canada is my cousin, because there are like 25 people here. I am also related to at least two species of moose, but that's another story.
Score = 1
i never get tired of seeing things or people referred to as a gay retard. seriously, lolz every dang time.
Score = 0