As someone who has held a job sitting in a cubicle typing up character-limited marketing descriptions of products no one wants, I understand how important it is to stay fresh and amuse yourself. I also understand genius when I see it. Whoever wrote this should have their own show. And then write the description of their own show.
Posted by Gabe at 4:00 PM in DVR Descriptions
Tags: High Tension | Puns | Spoilers
The Terminator trudged along the wooded path towards the lake, his gun dangling by his side, the taunts still ringing in his hypersensitive bionic ears. He stared at the ground as he walked, and didn't even bother scanning anything with...
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Do you ever eat foods that you know you don't like, just to remind yourself why you don't like them? I think that's a good thing to do sometimes! The worst case scenario is that you might momentarily have a...
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Last weekend, something strange happened. Some of the Videogum Monsters created their own secret, password-protected chat room. In 2009! Incredible! I suppose every monster has his cave, or whatever. As it turned out, though, we already had a Videogum Chat...
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The Challenge: I had to go on a 3.5 hour bus tour of totally random TV and film locations in New York City. Alone, and wearing a specific ridiculous tshirt. And I had to find someone to take my picture...
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I went to see Where the Wild Things Are on Saturday, but it was sold out. Ay-ay-ay. That was a surprise! I mean, anticipation for this movie seemed pretty high, but anticipation for lots of movies seems high, especially when...
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My roommate at my last apartment noticed that description, and made a similar comment. We were then delighted to discover that a LOT of the FEARnet movies have similarly awesome descriptions. Check them out. The amusement is endless (except for when you have run through all the movies and then it ends).
Score = 4
The description for "The Last House on the Left" (also FEARnet - coincidence????) was HYSTERICAL... but its gone now and I didn't commit it to memory.
i know - proof or it didn't happen. you're just going to have to take my word for it.
Score = 3
Amazing.
Score = 0
Cable television? Aren't we fancy...
Score = 5
I just spent four minutes watching that Circle of Life video, even though I have a midterm in 1 hour 40 minutes, and need to get much more studying done.
Because if you embed it videogum, I watch it. That is my videogum promise.
Except, "Gizzie" was damn hard to justify.
Score = 2
When you have a midterm in 1 hour 40 minutes, you can somehow watch paint dry and find a reason to be interested. VG embeds are pretty great, but telling anyone that you watched the whole 4 mins of "Circle of Life" may need some serious explanashe.
Good luck on your midterm! In a really weird move during my last final, the teacher passed out Fig Newtons (?) ==> I was obsessed with the packaging of Fig Newtons for 2.75 hours, the duration of the exam. Ask me a question about F.N.'s and I'll give you a full nutritional analysis.
Score = 1
Did you see the first 'Waxwork' about the wax figures that come to life and kill people? Mark and Sarah survived that one. Unfortunately, so did a wax hand that followed Sarah home and killed her stepfather. Now people think Sarah did it. Stupid wax hand.
Score = 2
Aside: High Tension is a pretty good horror flick. Fun to watch.
Score = 3
i just remembered how much i love the music to the lion king.
Score = 0
Yeah, the FEARnet copywriter is an underrated genius. He's like the new Arcata Eye.
I also feel that if FEARnet is going to capitalize the first part of their name, they might as well go the whole nine yards and officially make the change to FEAR!net.
Score = 1
is that....brian from family guy in the background? does gabe....secretly love seth macfarlane?
Score = 3
I wondered the same!
Why, it would be the scandal of the 2009 feb 11!
Score = 4
When is Gabe going to get his own show he can write descriptions for?
Score = 0
The guy who writes those FEARnet descriptions is pretty great. I have an addiction to shitty horror movies so I've probably seen all of them at some point.
Score = 1
I do this job for another on-demand channel. I tried to be funny one month and got yelled at. I'm jealous of the FEARnet guy.
Score = 0