The trailer for My Sister's Keeper starring Cameron Diaz as an old mom, Jason Patric trying to play someone other than the rapist in Your Friends And Neighbors, Alec Baldwin as a TV lawyer, and Abigail Breslin as, apparently, a little girl who is an asshole. Everybody here wants an Oscar soooo baaad:
I know it's based on a book, but it's like a studio executive yelled "Get me a movie about a hot couple with a kid with cancer, and get the director of The Notebook to direct it!" I'm not saying this movie won't make me cry when I inevitably see it, I'm just saying I'll be hate-crying hate-tears. (Also, Jason Patric is and forever will be the locker room rapist from Your Friends And Neighbors, and should just take that character on the road or something and stop trying.)
So as mentioned in Friday's Friday Fight, I really did attend a sold-out screening of #1 movie in the country He's Just Not That Into You with seven female friends, one reluctant male friend, and several boxes of Bandit box wine this weekend. Chances are, if you're interested in this movie, you already saw it this weekend too, but if you're waiting, here are some things we learned (without a single spoiler!) that you should know.
1. The male among us insisted upon taking a Klonopin (like a Valium, but stronger) before the movie, which was like the tranquilizer darts they give to lions before putting them in the cage. He remained docile throughout most of the movie, despite a few instances of audible groaning. He also reported several times, unasked, throughout the movie that Scarlett Johansson was "actually hot in this movie." So, guys, there's that.
A Hungarian government spokeswoman fainted at a press conference with the Prime Minister this week, and this is what he did about it. This is one for the girls:
RIGHT? There's also a tinge of Love, Actually in there. Barack Obama is inspiring all the other world leaders to try to be as dashing and heroic as him! It's so cute to watch them try.
This is a video in which Justin Long, Bradley Cooper, and Kevin Connolly try to convince dudes to see their movie He's Just Not That Into You by acting out the chick flick cliches that the movie does not contain. I'm not really sure why I actually watched it, but I'm glad I did, because besides having SEVERAL funny parts (after a slow start), it's cemented my theory that Justin Long can make anything funny, and Kevin Connolly can make anything uncomfortable. I don't think this is actually going to convince any dudes to see this movie, but as an online-only movie promo video, it should win all the awards for those:
There's finally a trailer for the Amy Poehler/Rachel Dratch/Parker Posey "lady version of Old School" comedy, Spring Breakdown:
The trailer says "available now," but Netflix lists the release date as "unknown." Despite the success of Baby Mama and Amy Poehler's heightened fame, this movie has been sitting on the shelf for over a year. Last month, Jezebel argued that maybe it's because the movie just isn't good, and the trailer doesn't provide much evidence to the contrary (though the Wilson Phillips line was funny.) BUT: the movie has one thing in its favor, quality-prediction-wise: the extremely shitty and unacceptable treatment studios give to trailers for comedies starring women (though not SATC, which wasn't a comedy and was even worse than the trailer). Like, have you SEEN the Baby Mama trailer? And have you SEEN Baby Mama? They're two completely different movies. I'll watch Spring Breakdown in hopes that it's more Romy And Michelle than The Sweetest Thing, but hopefully Amy Poehler's power has grown to the point where she can say "fuck you" to studio marketing departments who seek to use false advertising to sell her movies.
Katherine Heigl is quickly becoming Hollywood's go-to actress when they need a stuck up the c word audiences want to see get what's coming to her (or fall in love with someone she hates, whatever.) Latest evidence: The Ugly Truth, in which Katherine's sparring partner is Gerard Butler, coming to theaters April 3:
Whatever, I'll probably see that, if only for Cheryl Hines and to test my theory that, now that Judy Greer has moved on from best friend roles, Bree Turner is the new Judy Greer.
There's a new poster for He's Just Not That Into You, the already-over-hyped February chick flick starring every actor in Hollywood under 40. The trailer has been out since May, when May-Me thought it looked funnyish like How To Lose A Guy In 10 Days, but now the poster is out, the leaves have fallen from the trees, and November-Me is back to sneaking suspicions that we might have another Love, Actually on our hands. You know, Love, Actually, the bona-fide "New Christmas classic" that every chick seemed to suddenly own on December first of last year and make you watch again against your will? What IS IT with that movie? The full HJNTIY poster and some more ranting about Love, Actually after the jump.
BLOWING THE LID OFF: Adrants describes this Zales ad as "Ball Of String Captures Moment Of Love" (yeah, I still watched it even with that description, nullus), but as even the most hate-watchy student of chick flick classics knows, this ad is nothing but a total ripoff of a scene from Stepmom. And not just any scene from Stepmom: the most famous scene from Stepmom. The "string scene." Let's side-by-side this shit! I am so mad!:
Carrie Prejean turned the video camera off, put on some clothes, and stepped out of her house. It was a beautiful day outside. The air smelled like apples, and the late morning light hit the world in just such a...
After watching Death Sentence, a terrible movie starring Kevin Bacon as a father in search of vigilante justice directed by Saw's James Wan, Gabe embarked on The Hunt For The Worst Movie of All Time. This is his sad journey.
If you are a sassy and sarcastic young man in an American sitcom who represents the sitcom writer's desire that a nerdy Jewish teenager can somehow be the desirable romantic hero in this world, then eventually you will get a...
I shouldn't even be here right now. I SHOULD BE GETTING INTO MY COSTUME! If I don't hurry, my facepaint won't be dry before I get to the MOONVIE theater, and everyone will be like "hahah, you look like you're...
Blogging about TV and movies isn't all fun and videogames. Every week, Lindsay or Gabe will be presented with a physical or mental challenge that tests their bravery,patience, and taste.
The Challenge: I had to go on a 3.5 hour bus tour of totally random TV and film locations in New York City. Alone, and wearing a specific ridiculous tshirt. And I had to find someone to take my picture...
Uh. OK. Well, first let's address what this movie did well, like the disappointed parents we are (or at least that I am), recognizing that the negative feedback won't be useful or constructive if it isn't preceded by something positive....
