Ceci N'est Pas Une Miley Cyrus Stalker
So it turned out that a guy who seemed like a Miley Cyrus stalker was a Miley Cyrus stalker. It's just like Freud said: sometimes a Miley Cyrus stalker is just a Miley Cyrus stalker (Fun Fact: Sigmund Freud was addicted to cocaine). From TMZ
Georgia cops arrested Mark McLeod for disorderly conduct on June 23 in Tybee Island, GA [on the set of Miley's new movie] -- and during the incident cops say the guy made some very frightening statements about Miley.According to the police report, McLeod claimed he was "great friends with Miley" -- and that Miley had "told him to come see her today."
Cops say McLeod also said, "I will f***ing be with Miley ... we're supposed to be together and [the cops] couldn't stop it."
:(. Hopefully Mr. McLeod gets the psychiatric help that he needs. Seriously. This must be treatable, as I have encountered this type of behavior on two separate occasions, so clearly there is some kind of pattern.
Both instances happened during college (that's right, COLLEGE!). The first was when I was walking downtown with a friend of mine and we passed by a musical venue. The marquee read "An Evening with Joan Baez." A homeless man was screaming at an usher in a tuxedo. He yelled, "GO AHEAD AND CALL THE COPS, JOAN TOLD ME TO COME HERE. SHE IS EXPECTING ME!" It was the formal social call of "she is expecting me" that I appreciated the most. We kept walking, so I do not know whether or not he was able to keep his appointment with Ms. Baez.
The second instance is probably my favorite though. Through most of college I worked at a corner store that provided over-priced groceries, magazines, liquor, wine, beer, and basic over-the-counter pharmaceuticals. The Midwest equivalent of a bodega. We also accepted bottle and can returns (by hand, yuck), and our central location made us a hotspot for the local homeless population, and over the course of working there it was impossible not to get to know some of them. One woman, Dottie, came in multiple times a day, and one afternoon, the day after a Bruce Springsteen concert, she regaled the entire staff with the story of how after hanging out with Bruce in his dressing room (AFTER HANGING OUT WITH BRUCE IN HIS DRESSING ROOM) she was walking down the street and she realized that she had left her satchel of jewels there (SHE HAD LEFT HER SATCHEL OF JEWELS IN BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN'S DRESSING ROOM, YOU SEE) but luckily the security guards were very nice, and they let her back in to get it. Incredible. One of the best stories.
Mental illness is a serious issue that is not to be taken lightly. Duh Town: Population that sentence. But the world is a really big and complicated and scary place, and so we take delight where we can. Get well soon, everyone. (Via BuzzFeed.)
Previously: The NY Daily News Enables A Miley Stalker
Posted by Gabe at 10:15 AM in Caught On Tape
Tags: Crime | Mark McLeod | Mental Illness | Miley Cyrus | Superfans
That was no homeless man, Gabe. That was Bob Dylan.
Score = 23
That was actually Adam Sandler, and he was taking a spin on his new motor scooter. The screaming was a side effect to all the Novocain he was given earlier that day from his best friend.
Score = 2
was the homeless man or the usher in the tuxedo?
because that would be the fanciest homeless man around.
Score = 7
"Satchel" is the proper measurement of random unsorted jewels, by the way. Barrels : Monkeys :: Satchel : Jewels.
Score = 14
Can:Worms::Flock:Seagulls::Swarm:Toddlers, and such. That's basically what's going down. Peace out, New York.
Score = 5
The treachery of Stalkers/Images...
Score = 1
For some reason I'm more bothered by the headline....ain't it "Ce n'est pas" or "Je ne suis pas un fileur de Miley Cyrus". Fuck, now all those years of French being taught via Telefrancais is all flooding back. Good morning to you too!
Score = 0
Ce= it, ceci=this. Stalker in French = stalker. Thank God this was cleared out because obviously Gabe was going for a correct French sentence rather than a reference to a famous painting.
Score = 7
I never was demanding that I was right. Settle down.
Score = -2
peace out everybody im going to jail
Score = 6
See, and everybody calls me crazy for wearing my satchel of jewels around my neck at all times, secured by a length of burlap twine. See!?! Dottie knows (Dottie wore too much eye shadow, did she not?).
Score = 5
I like to think that whenever Da Cake Eatur comments on Videogum, he's consummating our tacit and very sexual bond.
But seriously, wouldn't it be ironic, and the perfect completion to your surrealist subject-line metaphor, Gabe, if this guy WASN'T actually a Miley Cyrus stalker, but, IN FACT, a tragically committed member of some comedy/performance art brigade?
Ceci n'est pas une Miley Cyrus stalker, indeed! He's just the perfect picture of one!
We're all being gooned!
Score = 8
All this time I thought you were exaggerating, but you really must be a 59 year-old man if you were in college when Joan Baez was relevant!
Score = 10
It's actually "Ceci n'est pas UN Miley Cyrus stalker", 'cause "Une" would mean that Mark is a girl. And girls don't stalk people. They just cook chicken for their family, like Gwyneth taught them how to do.
Voila!!
Score = 7
PEOPLE: it's a reference and a joke. Don't try to translate Videogum into 'real' languages unless you have the Snark to English dictionary handy.
Score = 8
(Also, for the record I beleive it would be "Ceci n'est pas un stalker de Miley Cyrus")
But that was in parentheses so I didn't really say it.
Score = 6
"Ceci n'est pas une parenthèse" ;)
Score = 2
Does anyone else hate how some news organizations (I use the term loosely, here, TMZ!) have started using the word "cops" instead of "police officers"?
Score = 0
@ThatSpencerGuy Actually I wish the "media" would simply call cops "thugs in blue" or a "state sanctioned gang." Until then, anything to remove the air of respect cops are too often given is okay by me.
Score = 2
"She's beyond a genius. From all the things that she knows." Good news guys, we're all beyond geniuses! Yay!
P.S. Gabe, could that be VC you worked at during college?
Score = 1
I was once stopped on my way home by two homeless men named Hot Dog and Egg Roll, who convinced me that if they could sing a song, and I couldn't guess what it was, I had to give them a beer. They proceeded to sing a (not half bad!) a capella version of "Another One Bites The Dust," and when I guessed it, they claimed I was wrong and that it was actually the Mr. Roger's Neighborhood theme song.
Needless to say, I gave them their beers and went on my way.
Score = 6
Is anyone else bothered/annoyed by the shift in news organizations (I guess I'm using the term loosely here, TMZ) from using the term "police officers" to using "cops"?
Score = 0