This is a picture of Mickey Rourke from last night, dressed up for a Halloween party at some club. Pretty cool costume! I think it's really neat that while everyone else is going as Sexy Candy Bar or Sexy Wallet, he's going as The Horrible Result of A Lifetime of Poor Decisions.
Seriously? You guys? WHAT IS GOING ON HERE? Don't get me wrong, it is definitely TERRIFYING, but also HUH? And I know that it is wrestling a little below the belt to say this, but prior to this picture I did not think that there was a way to make Mickey Rourke's face look any more unsettling or disastrous. But Mickey Rourke, who is a Certified Professional Mickey Rourke's Face Fuck Up Artist, proved me wrong. He definitely looks even more unsettling and even more disastrous.
"I'm just a broken down piece of meat covered in grease paint for some reason."
--Mickey Rourke, 1952-2012
Oh wait, I think I get it. He's going as Edward Normal Hands. YIKES. (More photos here.)
Let us be very clear on what is hilarious about this, because it is not this woman's uneventful sexual history. There is nothing funny about people not having sex, unless those people are Vince Vaughan and Malin Ackerman in Couples Retreat* (in theaters October 9th). What is hilarious about this is how completely unnecessary her virginity is to her argument/complaint. She appears to be insisting on, if not abstinence-based sex education, then at least a de-emphasis on intercourse in local health education. Sure. I mean, personally I think it's much more important to rap at kids about safe sex, Eric Bana-style:
These kids aren't idiots, they know. Sometimes you just have to get out there and have some fun no matter what. Just wash away the cares of the day. "This game is boring!" Shut up, you're boring. Now go hide. (Via BuzzFeed.)
Ever since X-Men Origins: Wolverine became the highest grossing movie of all time (surprising! also not true!) in May, Hugh Jackman has earned himself a much needed vacation. He is with his family somewhere, peeing his board shorts on a beach somewhere. Peeing his tuxedo at a romantic dinner. You know. So here comes Jaime Pressly, maybe. From the HuffingtonPost:
Jaime Pressly was photographed Sunday afternoon squatting outside a Los Angeles restaurant as a puddle of liquid pooled around her feet. Was she really so intoxicated that she urinated on the sidewalk in broad daylight?
Haha. Classic Pressly. The actress in her is always taking over. OR IS IT? Jaime responds via Twitter, which is incidentally just absolutely the best way to respond to everything:
Yes....that is me doing dare #8 at my bridal shower..Things are not always what they seem.. Notice my hand in the back..its pouring a bottl
UH OH, NOW WE WILL NEVER KNOW WHETHER OR NOT THINGS ARE ALWAYS WHAT THEY SEEM! Maybe this is the one time that it would have been better to respond using something other than the highly limited and ineffective method of communication that is Twitter.
Oh wait, she has another Twitter (phew, still the best):
A crafty gentleman by the name of Neil was casually viewing an old-school episode of Paramount's Popeye cartoon when it occurred to him to slow down the audio track of a walk-on mouse character.
Much to his surprise, Neil discovered that the mouse's heretofore nonsensical squeaks were, in reality, the rather crass in-studio yelps of director Isadore Sparber or animator Seymour Kneitel.
Good thinking, Neil. Very crafty. I was just saying to myself we need to slow this down (this=everything).
So it turned out that a guy who seemed like a Miley Cyrus stalkerwas a Miley Cyrus stalker. It's just like Freud said: sometimes a Miley Cyrus stalker is just a Miley Cyrus stalker (Fun Fact: Sigmund Freud was addicted to cocaine). From TMZ
Georgia cops arrested Mark McLeod for disorderly conduct on June 23 in Tybee Island, GA [on the set of Miley's new movie] -- and during the incident cops say the guy made some very frightening statements about Miley.
According to the police report, McLeod claimed he was "great friends with Miley" -- and that Miley had "told him to come see her today."
Cops say McLeod also said, "I will f***ing be with Miley ... we're supposed to be together and [the cops] couldn't stop it."
:(. Hopefully Mr. McLeod gets the psychiatric help that he needs. Seriously. This must be treatable, as I have encountered this type of behavior on two separate occasions, so clearly there is some kind of pattern.
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