Christina Aguilera To Focus On Ruining Movies Now
As we know, Christina Aguilera is very bad at whatever she does. She was bad at music when she did that. She is bad at marriage. And now it appears she is going to be bad at movies. From Variety:
Christina Aguilera will make her screen debut for Screen Gems in "Burlesque," a contemporary musical that Steven Antin will direct. Antin wrote a script that was revised by "Erin Brockovich" scribe Susannah Grant.Aguilera will play an ambitious smalltown girl with a big voice who finds love, family and success in a Los Angeles neo-burlesque club that appears to be right out of Bob Fosse's "Cabaret."
"I couldn't be more excited, as this was a project written with her in mind," Screen Gems topper Clint Culpepper said.
Oh good. A movie starring Christina Aguilera called Burlesque sounds terrible, but if it was written with her in mind then I am sure the dialogue just crackles on the page.
INT. BURLESQUE - DAY
Dr. Christina Aguilera, MD, walks in wearing knee high boots and little else.
My vagina is thirsty.
Its working title was Crossroads 2: Right On Time.
Posted by Gabe at 9:30 AM in Casting Calls, Music Related Content, What America Wants
Tags: Burlesque | Christina Aguilera
Her character's name? Vagina Melisma.
Score = 4
God I hope this won't resurrect that Lady Marmalade bullshit.
Score = 8
You can say that five more times
Score = 4
If so, Christina Aguilera will pop out of your mirror and screech causing your ears to bleed and your head to SPLODE
Score = 0
I think it'll be awesome. I want to shrink ray her tummy and put it in my pocket, bring it out at bars and make it do a dance.
Score = -1
Has no one learned the lessons of Glitter?
Score = 6
She's actually pretty good at music. Great voice and Back 2 Basics is a phenomenal album. Gabe, you have the sensibilities of a 79-year old man.
Score = 2
Back 2 Basics is phenomenal album? By whose standards? Christina's? Its awful, self indulgent and tripe. And I love pop music but that was just awful
Score = 4
Red lipstick makes it "classic."
Score = 0
I'm not sure this is a good time for people who are famous for one thing (acting, singing, having breasts, whatever) to display their talents at doing something else. Joaquin Phoenix and Denise Richards have set the bar pretty high.
Score = 7
So basically they're making Coyote Ugly 2?
Score = 0
Something tells us that she will attempt to burst our eardrums and send our brains leaking out of our ears (or what she calls "singing") in this movie.
Score = 1
that article you linked doesnt show her being bad at marriage - she agrees her husband has a big penis. thats what a good wife would do in my world
Score = 1