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October 6, 2008

Chris Brown Should Not Be Allowed To Talk, Paul Walker Should Not Be Allowed To Talk

Here is some behind the scenes footage from some movie starring Chris Brown and Paul Walker. That is how dumb it looks. They mention the movie 3,955 times in this clip, but I can't remember. I know there's a couch and some feathers in it.

The predicament that Chris Brown is in is that the Russians are storming in. Paul Walker likes shoot outs when they are technically on point and there is tactical reloading.

Do you know how much movies cost to make? It's thousands of thousands of hundreds of dollars. So just put it in the contract, Hollywood. Just put it in the contract. When you're getting everything ready, you just say "Chris Brown and Paul Walker are not allowed to talk. They are not allowed to describe what makes a scene good, and they should never explain what they like about shoot outs." Michael Ealy can keep talking until people know who he is, but then he will probably have to shut up, too, like a ballet, shut up.

Posted by Gabe at 3:40 PM in
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8 Comments

I PEE GOLD

I predict an Oscar for best obscure screenplay.

Posted by: I PEE GOLD profile link at 10/06/08 3:48 PM | Reply
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Becca

it is kinda like a ballet... because in a ballet there's almost always the obligatory jumping over couches, and hitting that hard floor and all kinds of stuff flying outta walls.

just like every ballet i've ever seen.

Posted by: Becca profile link at 10/06/08 3:58 PM | Reply
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I PEE GOLD

He meant like a gun ballet, with like fuckin' shooting and fuckin' yelling and fuckin' guns and fuckin' slo-mo and fuckin' shit!

Posted by: I PEE GOLD profile link in reply to Becca's comment at 10/06/08 5:16 PM | Reply
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in the preceding ad Rhapsody paid for the rights to use "Sound & Vision." Nice move, Trilogy. Always bet on Eno.

Posted by: trevormail profile link at 10/06/08 4:17 PM | Reply
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Kevin

THERE WAS A FIREFIGHT!!!

Anyway, I was confused when I clicked this because of the commercial that preceded it. Some Anne Hathaway lookalike was falling down the side of a buiding and landing inside bubbles, at which time Bowie's "Sound and Vision" would play, which is like the best song ever. I was like, uh, how is this not the best trailer ever? Then Chris Brown explained to me what movies were all about. This may have been said already, but shut up, Chris Brown.

Posted by: Kevin profile link at 10/06/08 6:25 PM | Reply
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Nice!!! A Boondocks Saints quote.

Did you mean to do that? :-\

Posted by: Selena in reply to Kevin's comment at 10/06/08 6:59 PM | Reply
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Kevin

haha yeah, i was just disappointed gabe didnt use it in the post, i thought for sure he would after i watched it. then again, i'm way smarter.

Posted by: Kevin profile link at 10/06/08 8:17 PM | Reply
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Jeb

ladies: want to know if a guy is an asshole? heat is one of his favorite movies. ultimate litmus.

Posted by: Jeb profile link at 10/06/08 10:03 PM | Reply
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