New Year, Same Gwyneth • Gwyneth Paltrow's New Year's Resolution is to never quit being such an insufferable asshole.
Posted at 4:00 PM in Backlashes
Tags: Gwyneth Paltrow
January 7, 2009
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After watching Death Sentence, a terrible movie starring Kevin Bacon as a father in search of vigilante justice directed by Saw's James Wan, Gabe embarked on The Hunt For The Worst Movie of All Time. This is his sad journey.
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Let's all go to the movies, and let's all see the same movie, and let's discuss it here.
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Gabe
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"I am the person my friends call when they want to know: "I am redoing this bathroom, and I want a sink that looks midcentury, but a contemporary version of a midcentury. Where should I go?" "
Answer: Off a cliff.
Score = 14
ha, exactly. gwyneth you tiiiiiiire me
Score = 0
She can always fall back on showing her bazooms on the red carpet, says my grandmother.
Score = 0
Gwynnie: "I am the person my friends call when they want to know: 'I am redoing this bathroom, and I want a sink that looks midcentury, but a contemporary version of a midcentury. Where should I go?'"
You should go somewhere and kill yourself?
Score = 0
Jinx. Wow, you really are in my mind.
Score = 0
I think it's more a testament to how disgustingly atrocious that statement is. Thanks Gweneth!
Score = 1
Gwyneth, I'm redoing my bathroom and want a sink that looks like mid-80's CBGB's after a GG Allin show, but a contemporary version of mid-80's CBGB's after a GG Allin show. Where should I go?
Score = 11
Blood orgy?
Gabe, this is not a good way to get a hit of energy. It's just noise to Gwyneth. She feels sorry for us/you.
Score = 2
"I think part of the problem is people get a hit of energy when they are negative about something, and it is a very detrimental way for them to get that hit of energy. They do not understand why they do not have a happy life."
Gwyneth's critics: crack addicts!
Score = 1
Who the fuck is Gwyneth Paltrow?
Score = -1
Very creative, asshole.
Score = 4
First Del Tha Funkee Homosapien and now Kanye? Why do you hate me hip hop?
Score = 0
Fuck off.
Score = 0
At last! Finally a website (sorry, newsletter) that deals with that age old problem of where to get a contemporary midcentury sink. That problem has often kept me awake at night, thanks Gwyneth.
Score = 3
Oo, I love when Kanye leaves comments. He's typing so hard on his Macbook Air, you guys.
Score = -1
Man. She's really bad at naming things.
Score = 2
POOP: It's a portal into Gwyneth Paltrow's life
Score = 4
Q: Why the name GOOP?
A: It is a nickname, like my name is G.P., so that is really where it came from. And I wanted it to be a word that means nothing and could mean anything.
You win Videogum, she really was one of the worst people of the year.
Score = 1