Here's The Gross Thing I Promised: Shark Eats Dead Horse
If you watch it against your better judgment, knowing that it's not something that you want to watch, you'll be super mad at me. So rather than shock anyone, here's a description: some guys were on a fishing trip near Fiji, where the found a floating dead horse that had been recently dumped in the water (hey 11 year old girls, the horse almost certainly died of natural causes, okay?). As they're taping the horse, a shark swims up and does a one-shark feeding frenzy on it. It's my opinion that this video could easily be on the National Geographic channel, because its appeal (besides childish gross-out appeal, which is there too), is getting the chance to see something we rarely see in nature. And since it's not a person, and the horse is already dead, and the video is literally of nature taking its course, it's not THAT terrible, okay? Anyway, all warnings apply!
Okay, now:
1. I love that it's really close to a mixed metaphor (jumping the shark/beating a dead horse)!
2. Notice the guys are laughing a lot in the beginning...and then it gets really quiet where they're probably like "Um, why are we taping this?" and then it goes off.
3. The shark makes CARTOON SHARK CHOMPING SOUNDS. Those sounds have been real all along!
(Hakuna Matata!)
Posted by Lindsay at 2:00 PM in Animals On Film, Gross
Tags: Horses | Sharks
Lindsay, this post seems a tad passive-aggressive.
Score = 14
heeyyyyyyyyyy....wait a minute. this video is of a SHARK EATING A DEAD HORSE! why didn't you warn us???
Score = 21
I for one enjoy this video thoroughly.
Score = 36
What a waste of perfectly good glue.
Score = 14
eh... wasn't that bad. circle of life and shit.
Score = 5
can everyday from now on be your 'last' day?
it could be like this, just like this, always.
Score = 16
agreed! I for one welcome the new inhibition-free Lindsay. Please start your own blog.
Score = 1
http://lindsayism.com
Score = 4
OH MY GOD THIS IS AWEESSOOOOOOOOOOOME!!!!!!!!!!
Score = 3
I wouldn't quite call a dead horse being dumped into the ocean "nature taking its course," but I get it.
Score = 20
"really close to a mixed metaphor"... Lindsay, you will be missed.
Score = 7
Um, that was pretty awesome. But who dumps a dead horse into the ocean?
Score = 4
Prove the horse didn't dump itself in the ocean.
He could have had a few drinks, been galloping around the forest, and "Oh my God, a cliff!"
Signed, Phil Spector's lawyer, currently representing the shark in question.
Score = 1
"1. I love that it's really close to a mixed metaphor (jumping the shark/beating a dead horse)!"
What time do they hand out the blogging pulitzers?
Score = 12
holy crap that was gross. way to go out on top. we'll miss you, lindsay.
Score = 0
If that horse had only seen Jessica Alba's posters...
Score = 17
Our hearts are like the horse
And Videogum is like the shark
Seriously Linds, can't you just hang out for a few more weeks or whatever?
Score = 6
too bad the horse wasn't still alive. now that would be nature taking its course.
Score = 2
Too bad the horse wasn't alive and a giant squid instead of a horse. That would be nature taking it TO THE MAX.
Score = 30
NOM NOM NOM
Score = 21
You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it not get eaten by a shark.
Score = 34
Um, http://www.lindsayism.com
Score = 2
Imagine if anyone else acted like this on the last day of their job.
"I'm just going to be going about doing my work as usual, except I'm going to make the watermark on that Word document a faded image of a turtle with it's shell smashed off."
Score = 14
That's kinda amazing.
Score = 0
Sharks look like oven mitts.
Score = 11
Now I don't have an irrational fear of sharks brought on by an early-in-life viewing of Jaws or anything. I never believed a great white would appear in my bath water and devour my rubber ducky before devouring me like a sentient paper shredder. I've even swam in the bosom of the Pacific Ocean with nary a thought of severed limbs and copious amounts of my blood painting the waters with the grace of an impressionist.
But if I was ten feet away from that monster going to town on a fucking horse in what looks like a very small boat, I don't think I would be lol'ing while filming the damn thing. Though towards the end of the clip, it does seem that they remember the fact that this killing machine's hunger likely won't satiated by a 250 pound mammal alone.
Score = 3
Well, this will sound pathetic, but seriously, I could have written this. I was also allowed to watch Jaws at too early an age, and I also spent a lot of time imagining horrible things happening in the tub. I mean, it makes SENSE. It's not like we have a joint fear of staplers or frozen food. But still, I've never met anyone else as scared of sharks as I am. Good to know Jaws causes all these fears.
Score = 0
Also, where are the "so hungry I could eat a horse" jokes?
Score = 3
is it sad that after al those warnings I wanted the shark to be way bigger and totally eat the shit out of that horse? I also watched it again because I didn't hear the chomping sounds the first time. I might need some shark-related therapy.
Score = 4
What a waste of a perfectly good dead horse
Score = -1
What a waste of a perfectly good dead horse
Score = -2
Was I the only one who thought that was kind of cute. The way the shark was wiggling around with it's little beedy eyes was kind of cute..... anyone?
Score = 3
I wasn't grossed out. I just said "well, would you look at that" to no one.
Oh.
Also, seriously, look at how much power that shark has! And then imagine it grabbin hold of you. :(
Score = 3
That was no more disturbing than that Hurricane Chris video from earlier (but for different reasons).
Score = 0
EWWW A SHARK!!!
Score = 0
is this what happens in FIJI? whatever happened to nice tropical islands and, i'm assuming, bottles of free fiji water?
Score = 0
That's it? I wanted so much more chomping!
Score = 0
That shark is so lucky that that horse was a dead horse and not a ZOMBIE horse
Score = 0