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I went out to lunch yesterday (my life is crazy!) with a friend (that’s right, a friend!) who picked me up in his car (“boom” — your mind). He had been listening to NPR on the drive over to pick me up, and he told me that NPR had used the word “delusional” more than a dozen times to describe the country. I had no idea what he was talking about! Well, what he was talking about was the furious debate that is now going on, spurred forward by genuine, clinical coconut Sarah Palin, who, I mean, it is just, like, WHAT? Why does anyone even listen to a single word that comes out of her heavily made-up mouth? It’s 2009, you guys. Her six months of being taken as a legitimate human being are over. But so, she claimed that Barack Obama’s health care reform bill would include forced euthanasia and “death panels”? And she claimed this on HER FACEBOOK PAGE? And now it is a real thing that people in the country are scared of? DID YOU GUYS HEAR THAT “WAR OF THE WORLDS” PROGRAM ON THE TRANSISTOR LAST NIGHT? NOT FOR NOTHING, BUT I REALLY THOUGHT WE WAS BEING TOOK OVER.
Unbelievable. I’m not sure if there is room in my bunker for all of us, but I will try to make some more room! Anyway, this death panel panel from last night’s Daily Show, with John Oliver, Samantha Bee, and Aasif Mandvi is funny.
We carry the fire, you guys.
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Hey you guys, I have a question (because I know most of you have great tastes!). How do you get someone to watch Lost? Someone who thinks it’s going to be this huge super-serious thing that always makes the viewer sad and the viewer will never understand? Ad thinks it’ll just be a painful experience? And you’ve tried to tell her differently? Also she makes you watch True Blood and NYC Prep every week. How?
Good question. Very relevant.
A question can bellow, in the kidney of the beast. A sampling of tastelessness, to the veritable feast.
Belong to my friendship, a song to my mind, a bellicose taste, or a unfindable find.
- the unknown 20th century poet Newman
you rupture my aorta of ‘belong’.
If you are gonna troll vgum, can you please get an avatar that is easier to hate?
This blog has the best trolls. Why would you hate them?
Haha poor guy. Relax! Not everyone has to watch what you like. Just watch it on your own and deal with it! Or explain to her that the show is grounded in the relationships and experiences of the people on the island–past and present. Or just grow up and suck it up! Either one my man.
Now to actually talk about this post: WTF America? We need to get a collective brain. Also Palin is fucking out. So she needs to be quiet.
But she makes me watch these other shows I don’t want to watch! And yet she won’t watch anything I want to! AH!
As long as we’re all coming out and saying it, I’ll go next.
I’m Rich, and my wife makes me watch The Secret Life of the American Teenager (with pregnant Molly Ringwald. RIP, JH).
I’ll follow you up, Rich. My gf makes me watch the same stuff “Need Help,” and also–coincidentally–seems against watching Lost when I’ve mentioned it, but it’s okay! It’s called a relationship and there’s a give and take and if TV programming similarities dictate how strongly your relationship is going, you have other problems, sir.
Whew, I’m glad I got that off my chest. I’d also like to thank Gabe for covering these terrible shows, so I can rinse my brain out afterwards.
I feel like I should add that I’m pretty sure my gf enjoys them ironically as she reads the Videogum recaps. Still, they are soooooo hard to sit through, and sometimes I think my constant joking at the expense of the show while it’s on starts to irk her.
Start with The Wire. Everyone likes that, you gain some credibility then you can ease her into whatever. Sorry for going off-topic, but I can’t bear to think about people mindlessly yelling about Socialism today.
She doesn’t like The Wire. She’s not big on anything with blood or whatever. She freaks out and says “no.” Believe me, I tried with that show.
the wire is one million times more painful and poignant than lost could ever hope to be. trying to get someone who refuses to watch lost because it’s too “difficult” and prefers to watch gossip girl to step up to the wire would be like throwing a hobbled baby fawn into a lion’s den. or some other convoluted metaphor like that.
The wire was an over rated, over hyped show, that I am convinced NOT ONE CRITIC watched past season 1, because if they had, the reviewers would have said more about how much it was hot garbage.
It’s just the cool thing to say is cool that you watch, cuz you’re cool.
Like LOST
My ex-WIFE USED TO make me WATCH REBA. That was SOME BULL-fuckin-SHIT, you KNOW WHAT I mean?
Serious discussions about healthcare always come back to Reba in the end.
Irrelevant.
and so, America continues down the slippery slope to Logan’s Run.
My hand is Glowing
i am going to my congressman’s town hall this week and i am SO EXCITED. it is going to be a shit show.
You should make a T-shirt that says “NO I WILL NOT SIT DOWN”
HA! no, i actually can’t go in there and act a fool, since i am an adult with a job and all that. instead, i have a printed out page of talking points. because i believe in the possibility to positively affect policy in this country via speaking with my congressman! or, more precisely, i hope that maybe i won’t get called a socialist and have my life threatened by my neighbors and maybe my congressman won’t be up on stage slowly praying for death and playing pong on his iphone and maybe sort of kind of paying attention. a girl’s gotta dream.
Nice shoutout to The Road, Gabe.
Cormac McCarthy (or C-Mac, as I call him…we’re friends like that) deserves more props.
Cormac has walked The Road of life… and has written some of the most beautifully whispered word currents every trickled from the mountaintops of the literary Rockies.
I agree with you, but… shut up.
HAHA
You carry the fire… of hilarity.
I just imagined Sarah Palin in that world. If she happened upon the boy she’d probably say “I’m not going to hurt you” while tucking a napikin into her collar and pulling out a fork.
Seconded!
“Ohhh, Socialism!” is my new favorite catch phrase. Gotta catch ‘em all!
tell her that LOST is actually a bright shiny show (shot in Hawaii) with romance and love (triangles). don’t try to convince her that the dark stuff is cool…
Q. What’s the difference between Sarah Palin’s mouth and her vagina?
A. Only some of the things that come out of her vagina are retarded.
I hate Sarah Palin and all, but still, boo!
I agree. I MEAN LOST is fuckin AWESOME DON’T get me wrong. And it’s probably MY FAVORITE SHOW on television RIGHT now. BUT, I feel LIKE IT’S MORE of a stepping STONE TO THE pinnacle of TELEVISION: The WIRE.
Could be worse… I catch my fiance watching Paris Hilton’s new BFF OnDemand without a trace of irony. I’ve never seen someone watch so many episodes of syndicated Reba. To her credit though, she does get an embarrassed look and flip the channel when I come in from work and catch her. Hearkens back to the days of my 13 yr old self watching scrambled Spice Channel with one eye on the door.
The Wire requires a minimum of 7 episodes in your case. I had the Lost issue you’re having. After 2 episodes of the Wire I was told it was “boring,” after 4 “OK” after 7 “hooked.”
If not, just read AMPAT’s Reba comment together; it’s the best thing I’ve seen in a while.
Sucks for you guys, my girlfriend watches good tv. either that are she knows her place as a woman and acts like everything i watch is good.
ps im joking, thats sexist, she actually likes the good stuff.
Her not being big on blood definitely explains why she makes you watch True Blood every week- Not a drop of blood on that show….ever.
yeah–no. gave the wire a chance, but the deadly dull realistic-but-boring pacing coupled with the very bad american accent was too much to take. sorry, wire fans, i know it is a beloved show.
which tv shows are good and which tv shows are bad is an infinitely more important conversation to have over and over again rather than think about public policy and the manipulation of the undereducated paranoid factions of our country by the health care insurance lobbyists and radio demagogues.
I know! I don’t get why she watches it, but literally everything else that has blood in it (if its on tv) gets the channel changed. Then she changes it back and I’m like wtf just happened on this movie/show. Guess I’ll never know!
It’ll make you go blind ya know.. trying to look two places at once.
Well this is awkward.
ridiculous! don’t ever change.
Ugh the last thing this site needs on its pages for comments is such blatant sexism against women. You should feel bad for the things you write on here. It is gross to say such evil things. I feel bad! For you! Ha! One day you will be punished hard for your terrible acts that are mean–jerk–while everyone else gets to be happy! Sexist! Go away to never come back to here with your sexist ways.
Because that’s what I best! Gah!
*do
I’m also ADD.