Leighton Meester has a sex tape now? NO WONDER SHE DIDN’T GET INTO YALE (I HATE MYSELF!). The worst part is that TMZ already made all of the “xoxo” and “spotted” jokes, so there isn’t even a clever way to talk about this. Because if there is one thing the world needs, it is a clever way to talk about a Leighton Meester sex tape. (That is not what the world needs!) TMZ reports:
We’ve learned a Meester tape is being shopped around town. It was shot a few years back, and shows Leighton in mostly innocuous though nude scenes — with several big exceptions … one involving her very talented feet.
We’re told a company called celebhotline.com is negotiating for the video. The company’s spokesperson, Kevin Blatt told us, “We’ve seen the tape and we’re hoping to close the deal.”
Ew. It was shot a few years back? Isn’t Leighton Meester, like, 12 years old? This is some kind of Chris Hansen sting operation. Everyone shut down your computer and put it in the garbage. If you put your computer in the garbage, nothing can be traced, and you can’t go to jail. Sneakers. You’re welcome, perverts. Xoxo, you know you’re perverts.