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I knew that Eli Roth, director of Hostel and Hostel 2, was in Quentin Tarantino’s new movie, Inglourious Basterds. He is even in the trailer. But lots of people are in the trailer. Samm Levine is in the trailer.
Samm Levine is not, however, on a poster.
Yikes. Personally, I’m not a fan of Eli Roth’s directing work because I feel like the world is a bad enough place and life is difficult as it is without actual images of horrific torture being burned into my face. But that’s just me. I recognize that lots of people love watching humanity pushed past its breaking point to a soundtrack of blood-cold shrieking, and somehow in my honest desire for everyone to have fun and do what they want to do while we’re alive as long as it doesn’t actually hurt anyone else, I am forced to accept that this is fair enough. Besides, Cabin Fever was pretty good! But I don’t think there’s any confusion about Eli Roth as an actor, is there? He is not very good at it. In fact, if I had to rank him, I would say that he is just slightly more talented than another director-would-be-movie-star: Quentin Tarantino.
But a movie poster is a really big deal. It has only a few seconds, a cursory glance, to win you over and convince you to invest your time and 12 dollars. Steve Zahn didn’t even make it onto the poster for his new movie, and Steve Zahn is great. This movie posters says “Eli Roth is a box office draw.” This movie poster says “the people want more Eli Roth.”
Eli Roth is America’s boyfriend.
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Is Eli Roth a household name? Because if you wouldn’t have told me he’s a director I would have guessed he was a political pundit for MSNBC or the “cool guy” at your office.
Eli Roth is totes a household name! Remember him hosting that game show Fun House or Survivor: Little Kids on Discovery Kids!?! Oh… that was JD Roth. Eli’s the one that had Rider Strong finger a girl’s thigh, huh? Nevermind…
You at least have to give it points for honesty.
so true.
this is must be a poster for some sort of Excruciatingly Bad Directors series. gotta be.
and the series is entitled Awesome.
i do have faith in Tarantino as a director, though. if he could launch Travolta’s career so John could go on to finally star in those Swordfish and Wild Hogs blockbusters, he’ll do fine with Roth. hey, maybe Roth will stop directing for a few years to toil away into acting obscurity, too!
wow. it must suck to have your celebrity look-a-like be Sylar. i secretly hope his chest hair, facial scruff and peter gallagher eyebrows merge.
ha ha! actually, flip the gender, and this is sarah silverman– and i love her/hate him, but they are truly separated at birth.
A movie poster is NOT a really big deal, considering that obviously this is not the only poster being used.
http://adweek.blogs.com/adfreak/poster-for-tarantinos-inglourious-basterds.html
Wait a minute, I actually like Tarantino(I know that is a bad thing to say on the internet since everyone on the internet doesn’t like him because unlike Kevin Smith he doesn’t spend all his days on it) but wait Eli Roth is in Inglourious Basterds(did I spell that incorrectly?) because I hate that dude? He is the douchebags of douchebags. Brody Jenner wakes up everyday and jacks off to a picture of Eli Roth hoping that a little more douchebag will cum off of him before filming Bromance 2 In Search of the Bro Hole.
The only reason Girl Next Door was even funny is because the porno producer in the film was based on Eli Roth’s douchebaggery. I could live through Mike Myers playing british and Brad Pitt playing a southerner but Eli Roth better last less time than the walk on role that Spielberg wrote for Vin Diesel in Saving Private Ryan because I don’t think I could take Eli Roth for two hours without resorting to cutting myself and/or killing everyone in the theater.
Put up something funny Videogum I need to get my mind off of this, oh wait liquor. Thank you Cinco De Mayo.
The Girl Next Door was funny?
Why does Ross Geller want to eat me?
Does the hand holding the gun look photoshopped in to anyone else? Like the photo was taken of him holding the baseball bat and having his other arm in his pocket and then in the editing room they were all “Nah dude, lets add a gun, bro.” and so they did?
I feel like I’ve been eye-raped.
Yikes. To me, Eli Roth is the embodiment of what of what fugly looks like if you spray douche all over it. And this is just the exterior superficial stuff, it probably gets worse if you muster the guts to peer inside. In short: My eyes! My eyes!!!
When the press tour for this is over he can replace Jonathan Silverman in the Weekend at Bernie’s remakes.
All I have to say is…..
Anyone who admits to liking smut movies like Hostel…..especially the smut film Hostel 2, I think they should have the same things done to them. I especially think that Eli should be sued for producing smut. What the hell has happened to horror movies? Its getting more and more disturbing. Theres more torture and suffering than I’ve ever seen. Now granted horror is supposed to be gory, the movies are way too realistically disturbing and senseless cruelty. I miss the days of Jason just killing people quickly. AT LEAST HE HAD THE COMMON COURTESY TO DO THAT…instead of doing it the way of Hostel. To hell with Quinten and his butt fart partner in smut Eli. If anyone thinks Im crazy, and you actually like these movies, then maybe you should have your sanity evaluated and if you know someone who likes these torture movies, stay clear of them. I know someone who likes the series and I swear the guy really wants to torture someone. He is the most evil person. People like this should be put away. Im done now
how about no.