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It’s a tough world out there and we all have to put food on our families. Get that paper! But if we’re lucky, no one videotapes us in the daily struggle to survive and then puts that tape on the Internet as a promotional vehicle for a morally questionable chain of retail outlets right at a point in our careers when people were starting to wonder if we were dead or working in real estate. Oh well! I’m sure Jewel will have plenty of time to consider the wisdom in this particular choice on the new mahogany deck she had installed at her second summer home. (Via ViralVideos.)
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“We’re enthusiastic about walmart” — that audience
“my wages are small I know, but it’s not yours, they are my own, and unions are never broken…because they don’t exist.”
Sounds like someone’s soul needs saving.
that, or she just sold it for an everyday low price.
I had the bottle of poison to my lips when I remembered I could press the “ll” button. Here’s a true story: I was once in my friend’s recording studio many years ago and he had recently done some work with this lady. So, he gets a fax from her (faxes were basically Flintstones emails) that says “thank you,” or something, in her handwriting and it’s literally the handwriting of a 13 year-old girl. Hearts over lower case “i’s,” stars instead of “a’s” and drawings of fluffy clouds. It was weird. I turned to my friend and he said, “yeah, she’s as retarded as you think she is.”
If Jewel was going to shill for any retailer, you’d think it would be… Jewel. #jokesformidwesterners
I prefer “The Arby’s Underneath the Bus Station Song” by Tom Waits.
From celebritynetworth.com –
“Jewel’s house in Texas is actually a 2,200 acre cattle ranch, where she and her husband both work and relax. Their home features hardwood walls and floors, lots of funky knicks-knacks and personal touches, a home recording studio for her, and a massive paddock for livestock. A river criss-crosses their property, and they also have a 230-acre lake, and nine ponds. Jewel’s house is, in many ways, the antithesis of the lifestyle she and her husband lead while on the road in their prospective careers. With ample indoor plumbing, and literally miles of land for horseback riding and exploring, Jewel’s house is as far from her childhood home as can be.”
That mahogany deck is going to look great.
“How’s the indoor plumbing in this place?”
“Ample.”
“Good. I hate when the indoor plumbing is….ampless? Umple?”
“scarce”
This video is a great way to plummet into a bottomless sinkhole of despair! It’s great for kids too!
I like it. Jewel is pretty. More Jewel posts, please.
I honestly thought this was a cover of “Wally World”.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WF0tkdhtIDA
In the mid 90s, I used to have a recurring beef with a friend over who was a better artist: Jewel or Fiona Apple. This year we get The Idler Wheel and this.
“Walmart you say, they have the shorter lines”
@nobrainer
Somewhere Paula Cole is sobbing gently in a Target parking lot.
I like this new game “Dead, or working in real estate?”.
Side note, as a 14-16 year old boy I used to go see Jewel sing in coffee shops around San Diego and I was completely in love with her. One time she broke her pick and asked if anybody had an extra and she was literally showered with them from adoring male fans. Then she pauses and says “A grey one?” It was awesome. This – this is decidedly un-awesome.
Now that “Service is Selling” video is only the second worst thing by Alaskans put on internet in the past week.
Jewel and Pitbull should tour together.
I don’t know which Walmarts she’s been shoppin at, but the ones here leave me with the distinct feeling that I need to shower.