Posted on Aug 29th, 2012 by Gabe Delahaye
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At the opening of the Republican National Convention last night, New Hampshire Senator Kelly Ayotte turns the tide on the 2012 election with an EXPLOSIVE revelation:
America, isn’t it time we elected a president who has childish experience with what is basically a fourth-episode challenge on Celebrity Apprentice?! This November, vote for Mitt Romney for President of Ten Cent Refreshments. And let’s tell Barack Hussein Obama “Somedays you’re in and somedays you’re out, please pack your weakest links and LEMONADE!” (Via Gotcha Media.)
Previously: Barack Obama Hates America’s Lemonadetrepreneurs
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Wait, there was a woman at the RNC???!?!
“who’s wife is that?” – every other person there
Oh sure. There are always a few stragglers willing to pretend that helmet hair, never touching your vagina and living your life at a rich man’s direction is the real feminism.
Fucking Ann Romney. That speech. I am *still* processing that speech. That was some 1972 anti-feminist parody nonsense world salad.
But… at least she has a husband.

I have been in a facebook argument about Ann Romney all morning. Until I realized that there are literally infinite possibilities of better uses for my time, up to and including forming a sea monkey Slayer cover band.
We’re touring this fall, guys! I think it’s gonna be a good time.
I’m bringing my Michelle Obama cut out as my +1!!
Why isn’t anyone talking about Talbots’ and Ann Taylor’s war on women?
I declare war on you for that statement. My closet is full of Talbots and Ann Taylor and I look GREAT, thank you very much!
There was also the black CNN camerawoman who had nuts thrown at her by some wacko yelling “this is how we feed animals”
Yeah, I mean, Barack Obama has no executive experience whatsoever…except for BEING PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES FOR ALMOST FOUR YEARS. So it’s just that tiny sliver of experience. Other than that, he was just a “community organizer,” haha, wink wink, and you know what that means (drug dealer).
She’s right. President Obama’s willingness to help provide innovative small companies with working capital shows he has now idea how to help businesses grow.
what a strange looking kitchen.
I’ve heard of lemonade stands, i’ve seen them in movies, but i’ve never encountered any. They’re like Big Foot, but less blurry (thanks mitch).
See also: adult chicken pox, identity theft.
brand new cars that won’t start while being chased by (insert enemy)
She’s right. At the age of eight, Mitt Romney had already acquired and consolidated seven lemonade stands and laid off 60 percent of the workforce.
The real questions is – do they have lemon aid stands in Kenya?
I know it can’t be true because Republicans don’t do this, but didn’t it seem like she was reading a…teleprompter?!?!?
I also heard that as a child, he encouraged children to send ALL rovers on over, regardless of color.
I heard that he was always pinning the tail on elephants rather than donkeys because the liberal elite media made them an easier target.
Does that mean that since I HAVE run a lemonade stand, I’m qualified to be President? Because let me tell you, that would end in me spilling a whole pitcher of lemonade (oil?) on the driveway (ocean?) and the running up to my bedroom (the Oval Office?) to cry.
Because we all know socialist Muslims don’t like capitalism! Honestly, these people could not get more “subtly” racist if they tried. I know someone somewhere is producing “…because he’s black and black people are lazy” stickers to slap on the end of the “Obama isn’t working” slogans just to be absolutely clear.
It always amazes me how all these asinine statements seem to be met with thunderous applause. The audience must clap more at cadence than at substance. Like “Obama” + meaningful lilting = giant praiseworthy zinger.
Excuse me, but running a lemonade stand is actually a first-episode style task on The Apprentice. (it was the series premiere even)
gifs may be frowned upon but this is the only bloody reaction I can muster
Ryan’s only work experience before suckling from the government teat was driving the Oscar Myer Wienermobile – Which actually gives you LESS work experience than running a lemonade stand because running a lemonade stand requires you to sell a product and collect money, whereas driving a Wienermobile requires you to… drive a Wienermobile.
Romney’s only experience is being born a multimillionaire aristocrat and leveraging that incredible luck into becoming Gordon Gecko a the expense of those he profited from.
Obama, working as a “community organizer”, has experience trying to help the struggling American public, which he has leveraged into becoming the most important and influential person in the world for the last 3.5 years, invaluable experience that can’t be matched.
So I don’t know, it seems like it’s a coin flip.
The kids next door discussed selling their parents’ beer at their yard sale earlier this year. So my neighbors’ kids 2042!!!
Not only did Obama never run a lemonade stand, he never even led his family across country in a covered wagon on the Oregon Trail!
Romney/Ryan 2012: “There’s always money in the lemonade stand.”
What is even happening anymore? That lady is probably so proud of whoever wrote that joke for her. That grin on her face and the applause of the audience takes the stupid quality up so many notches.
Look, I don’t agree with a number of Obama’s policies. But when I look at the nightmare people on the Republican side – who actually think that a woman’s body can reject pregnancy if she had a traumatic enough experience, or who think that not running a lemonade stand actually measures the quality of a person’s work experience – I’m so afraid that these people could be in charge.
Democrats say plenty of dumb shit too. Biden told a crowd, a number of them African American, that Romney “is going to put y’all back in chains.” Also this – “Barack Obama is “the first mainstream African-American who is articulate and bright and clean and a nice-looking guy.” Yikes, Joe Biden! That is some racist garbage coming out of your mouth.
President Camacho is looking pretty good right about now. “Shit. I know shit’s bad right now, with all that starving bullshit, and the dust storms, and we are running out of french fries and burrito coverings. But I got a solution.”
Re: the Biden Quote –
poor Franklin Douglas, W.E.B. Du Bois, MLK Jr., Sidney Poitier, Denzel Washington, Bill Cosby, etc (plus the women, but you get the point)
You know, I’m going to trust Barack Obama to decide whether he thought Joe Biden was being racist when he made that inartful compliment. Given that he named Biden his running mate, the answer was obviously no.
I hate this tit-for-tat crap. Democrats say dumb things. And you know what, some Democrats say racist things. But let’s not pretend that one party is not a gazillion times worse when it comes to this stuff and race relations in general. Let’s just not pretend, OK? And this isn’t directed as you, Costco. I just see a lot of forced “equivalence.” It’s BS. Joe Biden’s policies are good for minorities, and his poor choice of a word doesn’t change that. And who’s even complaining? White people. That’s who. Republicans and white liberals who are embarrassed by Biden.
At least no one said Watermelon.