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It can be hard, sometimes, to imagine other people’s motivations. Like why a person you knew in college would consistently tweet personal things about her disappointing love life, or why celebrities keep so many nude photos of themselves on their cell phones after they’ve (presumably) already sent them to whomever, or why anyone goes up to a celebrity and says ANYTHING, let alone a quote from a movie that celebrity was in. What is the endgame? And wouldn’t running up to them and just shouting their name at them have the same effect? “I KNOW YOU FROM SCREENS.” Lots of celebrity have stories that they tell on talk shows and in print interviews about fans doing this sort of thing, and here is Andrew Garfield’s girlfriend, Emma Stone’s. From ONTD:
Emma Stone is tired of being asked if she is ‘down to f**k’.
‘The Amazing Spider-Man’ actress constantly gets asked if she is ‘D.T.F’ after a phrase used in her film ‘Superbad’, but even such an offensive question doesn’t annoy her as much as people singing Natasha Bedingfield’s ‘A Pocket Full of Sunshine’ at her after her character in ‘Easy A’.
She said: ‘After ‘Superbad’ I always get, ‘Are you D.T.F?’ But more than anything, what I get is ‘Pocketful of Sunshine’ being sung to me. That song is the worst.’
So people see Emma Stone, like, walking out of a grocery store and they approach her and start singing that song? Just singing to her in the middle of everyone, because that song was in a movie? Or are TMZ tour participants are told before the bus starts moving that if they see Emma Stone they have to yell “ARE YOU D.T.F.” and then they get a water bottle? ????? What’s the damn deal, guys?! Have any of you asked Emma Stone if she was “D.T.F.” before, when you caught a glimpse of her in public? PROBABLY, RIGHT? Did she F you afterwards and/or are you guys very close now? What a sweet meet-cute for you two. For the rest of us, I’ve compiled a few better questions to ask, in case we happen to spot her in our own cities.
- HEY WHAT’S SPIDERMAN LIKE?
- HEY HOW’S YOUR HEAD FROM WHEN YOU HIT YOUR HEAD IN SUPERBAD?
- WHAT HAIR DO YOU LIKE BETTER, BLONDE HAIR OR RED HAIR?
- HEY EMMA WHAT DOES ANDREW GARFIELD’S BUTT LOOK LIKE?
- HOW’D YOU GET SO FAMOUS
- DO YOU KNOW IF JONAH HILL IS SKINNY RIGHT NOW OR IS HE FAT AGAIN
- WHERE ARE YOU FROM
- DO YOU HAVE A FACEBOOK AND WILL YOU ADD ME AS A FRIEND?
- WHY DO YOU HAVE A TWITTER IF YOU DON’T USE IT
- HOW TALL IS YOUR FRIEND TAYLOR SWIFT?
- HOW MUCH CLOTHING DO YOU HAVE?
- ARE YOU A JERK OR ARE YOU NICE?
- HOW DO YOU MEMORIZE ALL THE LINES, DO YOU HAVE A TRICK?
- “YOU LOOK PHOTOSHOPPED” GET IT
Ask away, and then maybe the thing you want to happen will happen!
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It’s not as bad as she makes it out to be. I mean, she hears that all the time, sure, but it’s only Jim Carrey asking her over and over again.
Maybe something like: “where do you get the things you think about and say from?”
Hey Emma – where do you get your ideas?
Hey Emma – Where do you get your spideas?
Hey Emma – what’s up with Topher Grace?
Does Andrew hate Mondays? Haha, yes!
Do you ever get sick of lasagna?
What’s Nermal like in real life?
Where is Lyman buried?
Did Irma really poison all those people?
I was going to make a joke about killing Bill Murray in front of her, but I suspect that is not something I should put in writing from my work computer, even in jest. I mean, I’m already going to jail after that booty pop video. I don’t want to go to super jail on the moon like in MIB3, even if Jemaine Clement is a winsome chap.
“Hey Emma, why is it that I seem to hear your name mentioned at least twice a day when a quick search of IMDB confirms I’ve only seen you in two movies (and I can’t quote a single line from Superbad and don’t remember your character in it)?”
I imagine I’d be wrestled to the ground before I got halfway through that question. She was funny hosting SNL, so there’s that.
Emma Stone is fantastic in so much more than Superbad. Easy A was completely charming, and she was also great in Zombieland, and Crazy,Stupid,Love. She even made an insufferable character in The Help palatable. In short, I have a gigantic girl crush on her and think that twice a day is justifiable for hearing her name in conversation.
I never know what to say to celebs. I literally bumped into Alec Baldwin this weekend and we both looked at each other like WHAT???? He looked like he was in a lot of back pain and he surely didn’t look happy. I should have asked him about his Nora Ephron tweet.
We walked by Chris Parnell once on the streets of NYC. He made slightly hostile eye contact (or maybe the sun was in his eyes? Benefit of the doubt) and I thought the same thing you did. Was I supposed to say “Hey Dr. Spaceman!” or start doing “Lazy Sunday” or something?
I’ve bragged about this before here and I’ll probably brag about this again until I get run out of town on a rail but I was walking around Brooklyn drunk one night and I saw Jesse Plemmons in front of a bar and I yelled “Lance!” He didn’t seemed to notice but I was really amused with myself.
My mother swears to this day that I was nearly knocked overnby Richard Dean Anderson, aka MacGyver. All I recall is a guy getting out of an apartment building in Vancouver with his bike.
You know what, not even gonna correct my spelling mistake at this point.
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Seriously? I would think that having random assholes on the street asking you if you are “down to fuck” all the time would, in fact, count as a problem, regardless of whether you are a “white girl celebrity.”
Straight up, I’d be happy to have random people singing to me or if I’m DTF if I was a millionaire and didn’t have to work 2 jobs.
I’m broke and put with assholes all the time. I’d rather be rich and dealing with assholes in my fancy clothes.
I’d rather be rich and have cancer than be broke and have cancer, doesn’t make cancer a trivial problem for rich people that they should just shut up about. Having money doesn’t make what basically amounts to sexual harassment any less awful or demeaning, particularly when she would never get that said to her if she were a male actor.
(note: I do not have cancer. I am making what the kids call “a point.”)
And what’s with all these middle-class people complaining about being raped? I’m living in poverty and haven’t been laid in years.
“Hey Emma, you seem cool, I bet we’d be great friends. Wanna grab a coffee sometime?”
Is what I should say…but when I run into her I’ll probably get really nervous and yell something like “YOU’RE SO COOL, WHY ARE YOU SO COOL? CALL ME MAYBE GET IT???”
I have a list of redhead upkeep questions to ask her, should I meet her, all queued up in Evernotes. Being a fake redhead is hard! She did it for years, she must have some magic or something. Do you sacrifice children to a demigod or do you just dye it like every single day of your life? This comment is ladies only btw. You can tell because it’s not even a little bit funny.
I used to dye my hair reddish in high school/college. I don’t know why I kept doing it. It would look a great dark reddish-brown and turn to a brittle orange within a month, every damn time. Maybe it’s easier if you start with blond and not near-black.
My best friend in high school? Her brother once went up to Alyson Hannigan? The girl from American Pie? In a club? And said “I wish I had a flute.”? And I had such a crush on him?
Hey Emma, are you stoned?!
In the public’s (pseudo?)defense, “Are you DTF?” is a question asked of lots of people regardless of whether or not they starred in Superbad. Sometimes people also starred in Jersey Shore. SO, you know. Normal.
“hey alex trebek, you DTF?” – i’d like to say that someday to him.
“A state I will be in at the Holiday Inn just off I-95 this Friday night”
“Alex, what is DTF?”
WHAT DID YOU THINK OF THAT SONG I WROTE ABOUT YOU TO THE TUNE OF THE ’60s SPIDER-MAN THEME SONG AND POSTED THE LYRICS ON A VIDEOGUM ARTICLE ABOUT YOU IN SPIDER-MAN?
a. What is the answer to the life, universe, everything?
b. Marry me?
holy shit, it’s the doritos guy!