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Someone in Hollywood is developing a Hellraiser TV show. That’s about all I know, the details seem very vague. You could read this blog about it and see if it makes any sense to you, and if it does, let me know, because I read it and I’ve got no idea. But the main point is there might be a Hellraiser TV show soon. Sure. Totally. But what will it be about? What kind of adventures will Hellraiser have?
-Hellraiser’s new roommate is a real slob, but when Hellraiser calls a “house meeting” to discuss his new “chore wheel” it creates tension in the apartment.
-Hellraiser has just met the girl of his dreams at the coffee shop he always hangs out at, but she won’t give him the time of day. To try and get her attention, he hangs her from meathooks!
-It’s a tough week at the office for Hellraiser when he’s passed over for a promotion, and his drunken attempt to redeem himself at the baby shower for Eileen from payroll only leads to more embarrassment.
-It’s the first year that Hellraiser’s parents are coming to his house for the holidays, and it’s a total disaster but it also reminds everyone of the importance of family.
-When a good friend is diagnosed with ovarian cancer, Hellraiser opens up about his own experiences as an overweight child on a Very Special Episode of The Hellraisers.
-Hellraiser asks two girls to prom. Uh oh!
Something like that, probably? The show will be like that exactly?
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-Pinhead just gets SO MAD because people are always calling him Hellraiser, when that’s not even his name!
That was a test, and you failed.
Whatever, Kelly, I don’t need your approval!
All Gabe has to do is lay out the bait, and facetaco cenobites.
Are the Kardashians in this?
Hellraiser saves a woman from being hit by a cab only to be thrust into the spotlight. How will Hellraiser handle his new found sex status symbol?!
As a woman, clearly I think this show should be about periods.
Always over saturating everything!
I think it’s about how Hellraiser learns a distant cousin died and now he’s the heir to another distant cousin’s title and estate. Can he fit into a stuffy aristocratic life, when at heart he’s just a working man?
Hellraiser throws a dinner party and doesn’t have enough food. Mr. Grant takes too much off the plate and then he tells him there want be enough be enough beef bourguignon because she wasn’t expecting so many people. Rhoda kicks Mr. Grant under the table and he puts some back on Hellraiser’s plate and says “I’m not that hungry”. Henry Winkler can’t find a seat to the table…WHAT NEXT?
Clearly there needs to be an episode where Hellraiser and his foil/love interest are trapped in an Elevator/Broom closet/Garage and they have to settle their differences…with sexy results!
Or maybe in a lament configuration box?
“You got Hellraise’d”
I think the whole series should tease us with, and eventually reveal, how Hellraiser killed our mother.
It will probably be about whatever the movies are about, right?
Tell that to Harry and the Hendersons, please, circa a long long time ago.
It should be a political talk show where Bill O’Reilly and Pinhead square off one on one. O’Reilly’s catchphrase is to call Pinhead a pinhead and Pinhead’s catchphrase is “I’m gonna raise some hell!”
It’s going to be about how your pain will be legendary in Hell.
I don’t like this comment. I absolutely LOVE it.
The title is actually Celebrity Hellraiser, and the guy from Hellraiser oversees challenges to find out which competitor is the most cutthroat at cutting throats!
a mischievous talking baby?
Hellraiser gets trapped in a meat locker overnight, ends up bonding with snarky Cenobite.
Hellraiser has to step up at the big game and do a 3-point half court shot or the team won’t win state and homecoming will be ruined.
This is going to be on ABC Family, right?
Like Wipeout but with Hellraiser?
Quote from the pilot of Bravo’s Hellraiser: “I’m not here to make friends. I’m here to physically tear friends apart. Kind of the opposite really…” -Pinhead.
Is Hellraiser the new Bachelor? Because everyone really will be discussing that shocking rose scene the next day, especially if a ton of pharmaceutical reps are brutally slaughtered in the most dramatic season to date!!
Pinhead spills a drink on himself while getting drinks with co-workers at a midtown Irish bar, and he’s so humiliated, he reacts by having metallic chains come down from the ceiling and slash through everybody’s bodies, graphically killing them.
Pinhead is waiting in line at a Starbucks when someone pulls a “chat & cut” right in front of him. He’s so mad, he reacts by having metallic chains come down from the ceiling and slash through everybody’s bodies, graphically killing them.
Pinhead accidentally hits “Reply All” and sends an embarrassing email about a female co-worker to everyone in the office. Unable to “retrieve” the email, Pinhead has metallic chains come down from the ceiling and slash through everybody’s bodies, graphically killing them.
I mean, the show just writes itself.
If history has taught us anything, it will be about an antique shop. The proprietors will be trying to recover cursed artifacts that have been distributed through means I can’t remember.
A show about horrific, deathless creatures whose very existence is to experience and perpetuate endless, mind-numbing agony?
It is going to be about lawyers.
that or it’s another real housewives show.
‘Hellraiser has just met the girl of his dreams’
There is no one that is actually called ‘Hellraiser’, nor ‘Pinhead’. I think you’re actually referring to Lead Cenobite.
What an abomination this will be. Ruining an already ruined thing – and if anyone ever watched the Nightmare on Elm street TV series ‘Freddy’s Nightmare’ you will be frightened for what’s about to come…