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Oh no, you guys, we have a HOLLYWOOD EMERGENCY! Johnny Depp has been cast to star in a remake of the 1934 film The Thin Man, about a former private detective and his wife. In this movie, Johnny Depp will need someone to play the wife. And that’s where the emergency comes in: SO MANY ACTRESSES WANT TO BE HIS WIFE IN THIS MOVIE! Deadline has the scoop:
Rob Marshall next week begins meetings to find who’ll play Nora in the Billy Ray-scripted Warner Bros remake of The Thin Man. Here are the named I’m hearing who are interested in cavorting with Johnny Depp, who’ll play the tipsy socialite-turned-sleuth Nick Charles: Eva Green, Amy Adams, Emma Stone, Carey Mulligan, Rachel Weisz, Kristen Wiig, Emily Blunt and Isla Fisher.
Really, Johnny Depp’s character’s name is Nick and his wife’s name is Nora so I THINK HOLLYWOOD ALREADY SOLVED THAT PUZZLE, but if they MUST search for a new Nora it’s only right that we, the experts, help them out. Please vote in our poll to help them (Hollywood) out.
Loading ...Thanks for voting! She’ll let you know when she hears back from Hollywood!
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It should be Amy Adams AND Isla Fischer. #olsentwinningit
Yes!
In a week filled with placenta-eating and unusual baby-feeding, it’s amazing that Kelly’s tacit endorsement of bestiality is only the third most disgusting thing we’ve talked about in the past 5 days.
that twlight wedding grossed me out too, man.
Oh yeah. And also the number one movie in the country being about a bunch of kids killing each other for sport.
Man, this week has been ROUGH.
that’s what the Lorax is about?
wait. just got Monday’s Hollywood Reporter today. ugh. i need to fire my mailman
Johnny Depp in drag duh
He’s really pretty. He should consider a drag career if this Hollywood thing doesn’t pan out.
There’s nothing Fishie about this poll.
If they HAVE to remake it, which I do not think they do, just get a dvd player, Hollywood, and rewatch the original, it is great, but if they HAVE to, I vote for Melanie Laurent. Or Tilda. But she should also be Nick. And the titular Thin Man. And everyone else. And also the writer/director/producer.
i think they should call it a remake and have trailers and everything. Then when you show up opening night they actually just screen the original. And then it wins all the Oscars, because hollywood thinks black and white is edgy.
Holy shit that’s the best idea I have ever heard!!
Clearly our generation’s Schwan’s Drug Store is my spank bank.
Wow, that’s some great suggestions from Deadline there. My choice from that list would definitely be 23 year old actress Emma Stone, who is still in a stage of her career where she largely plays high school-age characters. I can’t imagine a more natural casting for the part of a woman who has dated, married, and lived to the retirement of a detective played by Johnny Depp. Job done. Sorry, Birdie. Role’s taken.
the good news is that Uggie will be getting more work.
Using modern computer technology, I enhanced the blue dot and discovered his leading lady is none other than Smurfette!
Or maybe Paris is holder her breath…
or maybe I meant to post this image too….Enhance!
and maybe I meant holding…
So anyway, I’ll just be over here in the corner rocking back and forward and sobbing quietly.
i was really hoping they would forget about this plan. just fuck off, johnny depp. you will never be william powell.
For a second I thought it said ‘Who Should Play Johnny Depp’s Wife In the THIRD Man?” and I got so excited to make some references to the many lives of Harry Lime and “He’ll have you in a dither with his zither!” etc. Oh well.