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Uh oh! Did you forget about ChatAboutJesus? That’s OK. We all make mistakes. God forgives you. And this new ad reminds you.
mardigras69: does god ever forgive u???
bestfriendz: forgive u 4 whut u r so nice!
mardigras69: pretend u knew sumone who killed sumone with their car but then they got scard and trid 2 hide tha body by taking it back 3 their garage and dismembering tha bodE and throwing plastic bags filled with body parts & bricks in2 the man-made lake behind their housing complez.
bestfriendz: OK
mardigras69: r u imagining that?
bestfriendz: y
mardigras69: does god forgive u for that?
bestfriendz: sext Him u r sorry!!!!
mardigras69: whut if i’m not?
bestfriendz: LOL
mardigras69: no, not LOL
bestfriendz: LOL
mardigras69: LOL
bestfriendz: LOL
mardigras69: PRAIZE B 3 JESUS!
bestfriendz: chatchatchatchatchat!
mardigras69 has logged off
bestfriendz: LOL
(Video via ChristianNightmares.)
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Shame #whatwetalkaboutwhenwetalkaboutjesus
Dang! I logged in to post “What we chat about when we chat about Jesus.” *shakes fist*
The chataboutjesus version of that Shaggy song It Wasn’t Me is weird
fondue: Hey, are there any monsters out there who know how to forget about a mistake?
Ian: Yes, I too have accidentally downvoted comments I meant to upvote
R2: Forgetting is hard, forgiving is ez. Sup, fondue?
fondue: i snt Kelly a tip of a gross ytube vid of a man w his foot cut off n i thnk she’s mad @ m3 now
Just t4ke 4 F0rg3t M3 N0w?
As usual, had to watch this without sound. Please tell me there’s some hilarious music in the background!
It’s kind of like a lamer version of I Will Follow You Into The Dark’s guitar part.
Wait, which video are you watching? The video I’m watching has “Hoochie Mama” by 2 Live Crew as the background music.
“Listen, Jesus. It wasn’t my fault. I was hanging out with that legalizeit420 guy. He’s a bad influence.” – mardigras69
It’s only Wednesday but we definitely have ourselves a thread of the week!
NO IT WON’T WORK YOU SLUT.
Yeah, she totally banged those two guys in front of Jesus and everything.
Every time you put something in your lady parts, Jesus cries.
True story: “Jesus cries,” was my parents’ entire disciplinary strategy when I was growing up.
KEEP THAT ASPIRIN BETWEEN YOUR LEGS. YOU KEEP IT THERE, HUSSY.
If she keeps an aspirin between her legs then at least her boyfriend can’t use the headache excuse, amirite?
-prtybear96
Don’t forget the “t”s in twitter are crosses!
I imagine God fielding tweets like some celestial Wolf Blitzer.
God keeps ignoring my friend requests, but I’m pretty sure it’s a fake profile anyway.
“how do u get bad stuff off?”
“idk. e-meter or something.”
ChatAboutDianetics.com
We Need to Talk about Jesus – Staring Kirk Cameron as Tilda Swinton
Help, I need to talk to someone about my sins!
-Abandon invisible magic.
But, Jesus is real!
-He’s as real as Pete’s Dragon you dummy.
But what about my sins?
-Shut up you’re an idiot.
just think of ur mistake as like an eternal downvote
)
Aren’t all mistakes definitely permanent? Or no, because time-travel? I don’t get this Jesus.
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