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How’s he gonna be your boyfriend if he doesn’t know you? Get your head in the game! Put on some make-up. Don’t be TOO flirty, just say cutesy things. Look, you know most of this stuff already, it’s just about being focussed, having a game plan, and making sure your boyfriend knows that you are available and ask a friend to ask them if they like you. The answer will be a lie. Good luck! (Thanks for the tip, Lizz.)
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I really feel like I’m going to have a lot to explain if anybody ever checks into the websites I look at when I’m at work.
Someone just walked in on me watching this video. Luckily it was a person that understood it was for my LOL portfolio.
Doesn’t change much into adulthood, am I right ladies?
Her advice was way better than any tips I got in college.
The first way to get a teenage boy interested is to have boobs. That is all the ways to have a teenage boy be interested in you.
It doesn’t hurt for any lady monsters out there looking to get adult boys interested in them either. #Secrets #Advice
I forget which wise Monster it was who said “thank God there was no you tube when I was in middle school.”
whoa! i think that was me! and it’s totally true! i would’ve posted the saddest “i hate my mom and love nine inch nails” videos showcasing my acne and vague comprehension of shitty nihilist philosophers that i’d never actually read.
WRONG.
The real way to get a boy/girlfriend is to whip up a MASH and let the fates decide.
She seemed a oddly apologetic about not being interested in crazy guys.
I don’t have kids, but I imagine a video like this must be terrifying for someone who has a daughter approaching middle school age.
Thankfully, I have sons. A friend with daughters once told me, “You just have to worry about 1 penis. I have to worry about ALL the penises.” #sharinggum
even at 24, this seems like the most terrifying way to get a boyfriend.
At 34, I’m constantly told I’m too flirty with boys in my class.
I’m writing all this down in my Lisa Frank notebook to send back in time to Baby Smokey, Lake House style. Of course, at that time all boys were good for was playing power rangers and kickball, so it might be a wasted effort. #LateBloomer, #ThankGod
HI ROBERT!
Oh Hi Mark
Hi!
“So if you’re in high school you probably shouldn’t watch this video.”
I don’t know about that. These are some pretty good tips. The “‘Heyyyy-ey’ plus hallway wink” is a gem, as is assuring boyfriends that you like them.
Most of my break ups have been because I was not called-to-then-winked-at enough, and even if I was, they never said anything about liking me, so I had to break up with them. Tragic.
This isn’t how to KEEP a boyfriend, only how to get them. She’s too young to tie herself down too long.
Fuck and run, fuck and run, even when I was twelve
That’s a damn good point, smokey.
I guess I’ve been holding the ladies up to an impossible ideal of persistently cat-calling, winking at me, and assuring me I’m likable while in a relationship, and understandably that is just how to initially get one’s attention, not to be used as the sturdy foundation for a long term courtship.
That is what mixed tapes are for. Maybe a nice card.
I still miss making mixed tapes! The duct/scotch blend was one of my best.
Katherine Chloe Cahoon was so cute when she was a kid!
The Single Girl’s Guide to Meeting Middle School Men
Who directed this video?
George Glass?
Right?
Like the Brady Bunch?
With Jan?
And her fake boyfriend?
Named George Glass?
That she made up?
After Clark Tyson wouldn’t ask her out?
Because he liked Marsha?
And Mike and Carol felt bad?
So they threw her a surprise party?
And Jan had no date?
So she made up George Glass?
Right?
Right?
He directed this video.
True tale: I know a family of eight where the youngest daughter turned 40 and wasn’t married yet, and they all felt super sorry for her because in this family’s value system, to be single was the worst tragedy imaginable (sorry, Auschwitz, nice try!). So, to cheer her up, Brady Style, they threw a giant surprise party, which I got to attend. YES! EASILY one of the most horrifying/hilarious events ever, like a slow-motion Hindenberg but instead of fire, cake.
No one in that family really had a sense of humor except the gay uncle, who no one would admit was gay, even though he was an interior decorator with a live-in “business partner.” He hosted the party and made sure there was lots of wine, thank God (not that most of the family approved of “alcohol,” but this was a “special occasion”). I drifted from from one inane conversation to the next and witnessed, again and again, people dropping out of high merriment to make sure the Jan wasn’t looking and then they’d whisper, “She seems to be having fun tonight [even though she has no man].”
Post Script: A year later, this Jan had met someone and was engaged. “When you know, you just know.”
I feel bad for laughing at this, but it’s girls like this that made my life miserable in junior high.
ugh, i am so glad that i am old enough where the most important step is get drunk.
Is this her audition tape for the Sex and the City prequel?
I am not entertained.
Anyone else think it’s weird that she totally ignored genital grooming?
Look who didn’t click on the annotations.
I was really afraid she was going to go there when she talked about her “nighttime grooming!!”
Do you like me?
_Yes
_No (although this is a fake answer, I was talking to my friend and her friend’s boyfriend asked his friend to ask you something and you said yes so I know it’s a lie if you say no)
_*wink*
This sounds like Tommy Wissaeu’s Advice For Getting A Middle School Boyfriend. (which would be exclusively sold on VHS)
“What we did for our first date was, I kind of encouraged him to ask me out.”
What? That was the activity for your date? That seems like the worst date ever.
She’s totally Katherine Heigl movie. Always weighing her life’s worth by whether or not she has a boyfriend.
This is good advice! Thanks, Didion98!
Doesn’t anyone watch the news? You get a boyfriend in middle school by going to Rainbow parties.
Enjoy your short tenure, Robert! Just know that high school is run by the crazy guys:
Briona?
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