
Newt Gingrich, future beloved two-term Republican president of the United States of America, is currently in the process of being elected President. This means going on A LOT of radio shows, and being constantly asked about who would play him in the movie of his life. It’s called running for president, and it’s called being an American. So you can guess what happened when he made a phone-in visit to the Rich Stevens Radio Show earlier today! From TMZ:
The Republican candidate phoned in to the Rich Stevens Radio Show today … when he was asked, “If Hollywood was going to do a movie about your life, who would you like to see play the lead role?”
Newt replied, “Oh, in my fantasy life? Brad Pitt … why not?!
Right. Why not? That seems pretty obvious. Almost like one of those questions that you don’t really even need to ask, like when Tyra asks the models on America’s Next Top Model who they think had the ‘best photo’ that week. It’s like, yeah, no doy, they’re going to say their own photo was the best photo that week. Similarly it’s like yeah, no doy, Newt Gingrich, Brad Pitt. Why are we wasting our time here, NEXT QUESTION PLEASE.
Stevens quipped, “Is it because you guys look alike?”
Newt fired right back. “No, I don’t look like him at all. He’s thinner, he’s better looking, he’s younger. But you asked me if I had anyone who could play me in a movie … why not go for Brad Pitt?”
Ohhhh, right. Now that he mentions it, Brad Pitt is a bit thinner than Newt Gingrich. And the age thing is probably off a bit. I don’t know, I still think it could work? It wouldn’t be perfect but I still think people would get it. And I’m sure Brad would be cool with gaining the 10 or 15lbs for the role. If unavailable, though, I think any of these actors would be fine taking his place:
- The Rock
- Andy Milonakis
- George Clooney
- A Football Player
- Glenn Close
- The cast of It’s Always Sunny In Philadelphia
- Johnny Depp
- A Beautiful Robot Actor From The Future
- Uggie
- Lauren Conrad
- Tilda Swinton
- Vincent Gallo
- Brad Pitt again
Not too shabby, Newt! I mean, of course it is a fantasy. No one has ever made a movie about anybody that has included anyone that has ever been in politics, but it’s fun to think about someone like Brad Pitt or Andy Milonakis taking on the role. In the hypothetical movie of my life, I hope the role is given to Brad Pitt as well. #brad4presidentgingrich2012





























not Drake?
I googled some awful things for ideas and I found this:
To be honest, I think Carson Daly would be better at playing Herman Cain if only because from this image I can infer that Mr. Daly also refuses to apologize for the greatness of America… and that’s all I care about.
The ladyblog has a really annoying coworker who has a habit of talking about things that are several years old like she just discovered this amazing new thing that only she knows about. About a month ago she came into the office and said “You guys! I just saw this hilarious shirt! It said ‘These colors don’t run’ with a picture of an american flag. Isn’t that great????”
I hope everyone turned around in swivel chairs, stared at her like dogs that had just been shown a card trick, then swiveled back around to their own business.
Oh. I forgot to add the record scratch.
I just joined a charity curling tournament and I tried so, so hard to make our team name These Curlers Don’t Run. No one else seemed to be amused.
I curled for the first time last year! It was so much more fun than I ever thought it would be. We wrote “LIVE FAST” and “CURL HARD” on our knuckles and got very drunk.
Gollum in an Andy Serkis costume dressed up as a bag of bread for Halloween
D’oh!
Matthew Bellamy, whoever that is.
LOUIS SIMON SOMETHING SOMETHING IN CAPS!!!!!
GET YOUR EARS CHECKED. HE IS THE GREATEST MUSICIAN IN THE WHOLE WORLD.
You don’t even deserve to have ears.
Matthew Bellamy was pretty good in the role of Thom Yorke.
I once went to a music festival where my friends were more excited about Muse than about The Cure. They tried to leave before The Cure finished their set. I talk to none of these friends anymore.
I have a better choice:
Jennifer Aniston can play Newt’s 1st wife.
Angelina Jolie can play his second wife.
Oh… that’s the joke…
I would want Andy Serkis, but only if he was going to play Newt Gingrich as portrayed by Gollum. You know, to remain true to life.
I think Taylor Lautner’s got some room in his schedule, now that he’s not doing that Stretch Armstrong movie anymore. Why not?
This will be one of the first casting calls to prominently feature the phrase “glandular problems” when describing the lead.
To be specific from the cast of Always Sunny, Danny DeVito (in one if his famous wigs). Wait for it…..
ok it’s been 4 minutes. where’s our favorite pic?
Uhhhh, this one?

Kate! I was out having dinner and missed this opportunity! I am sorry that I wasn’t here to…

Get Shorty.
Thanks guys! I was out to dinner and missed it!!!
great new name djfreshie!
Thanks Kate! But I misspelled Waff(l)es! It’s been fixed.
Is that her real face?? She looks like one of those German Karnival puppets.
That’s Charles Krauthammer on the left. Dead ringer.
Well I’m never sleeping again.
You’re welcome. Did you notice the little people peeping out of their necks? Double you’re welcome.
(You’re double welcome?)
I am so happy that Tilda was mentioned. YOU HAVE NO IDEA.
#Tilda4everything(evenNewtbecausesheisabaddassandcouldTOTALLYdoit)
how about ricky gervais? he seems just as mean-spirited and full of himself and his awesomely terrible ideas.
“i’m
notgoing tohost the golden globes againbe the nominee.”Yes, lets get Brad Pitt if bloated jack-o-lantern with a grey wig is unavailable.
When will someone teach interviewers the “Ask a silly question…” rule?
(As a former sports reporter, I will admit I have been guilty of this offense in the past. But still!!!)
“Where do you get ogg? Oh. Excuse me. ‘Off.’ Where do you get off? Oh. I’m sorry. Misread that again. Ahem. Where do you get your ideas? Whoops! Oh man. You’re not going to believe this. Sorry. Threes the charm. Sorry. Ahem. Sorry. Ok. Who would play you in a smoothieMOVIE!!! Movie! Who would play you in a movie?”
Newt Gingrich knows where to get free-format music files. He loves them.
At least St. Angie has Callista’s cold and icy stare down pat.
For real though, Philip Seymour Hoffman would be great as Newt Gingrich in a movie where the audience is supposed to dislike Newt Gingrich. Like a Clinton biopic. Linda Cardellini plays Hillary Clinton. Come at me, Hollywood.