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At this point, it’s pretty common knowledge that foreign television is completely bonkers. “Simpsons did it.” Everyone knows. It’s crazy and so weird and makes no sense and a thousand monkeys typing on a thousand typewriters for a thousand years couldn’t recreate an explanation for what is even going on with foreign television. I’m talking, of course, about their weird, brightly colored, noisy, variety talk shows that seem like they must be for children but are somehow for adults. Everything else on foreign television is dubbed Friends reruns. But, even if we all know that the foreign TV is the bananas, it doesn’t mean that sometimes we don’t see a little bit of it and go, like, oh yeah, no, I remember, and even after all these years it never ceases to amaze. (For example: Japanese Blackface Obama Magician.) Case in point: today’s clip in which Peter Dinklage sits in an overstuffed red easy chair, alone in the middle of a massive television studio as a woman who is basically dressed in lingerie and leather pants pretends to be…a…fashion photographer who can only take fashion photographs while also doing the splits and mugging for another, even sexier photographer probably while in the background a live studio audience simply claps in unenthusiastic unison to the crappy white-man’s r&b playing over the loudspeakers. You know, normal TV stuff.
MAMA MIA, THAT’S AH-CRAZY TV! (Thanks for the tip, Spencer.)
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Yikes, her pants are so tight, I could practically see her Dinklage.
I almost went with Peter instead of Dinklage, FYI, but that made it weird.
Then, I held on to my butt.
?
OK OK OK, David Lynch — I will buy your fucking coffee.
Mi piace molto questo.
Weird European shows are the BEST! There is a British dating show I saw once at like 2 in the morning, it was the most amazing thing I’ve ever seen. This lady had to choose from six guys, but she couldn’t see any of them, all of their interactions were in dark rooms and revolved around the other senses. BUT! She didn’t know, these weren’t just six random guys! Two of them were dudes who knew here and genuinely wanted to date her, two were dudes who knew her and haaaaaaated her, and two were the grossest, creepiest people the producers could find. Then, whichever guy she chose, they then had a choice of going on a date with her or taking some money and sending her on a date with any of the other dudes. THIS SHOW SHOULD BE ON ALL THE TIME IN EVERY COUNTRY!
There used to be a game show on in Europe called Tutti Fruitti. I have no idea what the rules were because it was in some other language (Italian I think?) but we were watching it in Germany. We were shocked because every now and then the Tutti Fruitti girls would just flash the cameras. Randomly. What the heck? Anyone else see this?
Wikipedia said: “Tutti Frutti was the German version of the Italian game show Colpo Grosso” and I just closed the tab because I knew it couldn’t get better than that.
Oh, it gets better. Behold:
“This was a group of internationally well-known models, who were hired permanently to fill certain roles in the show. Each was representing a certain fruit and some are still known as this fruit. ”
This show, by the way, went off the air in 1993. So there are ladies who are still known as kiwis and tangelos 19 years later.
This is a clip of the italian tvshow “Colpo Grosso” (1987-1991) that you’re talking about http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tVgrojje0Qc
(this clip is safe for work: but I remember that the “cin-cin girls” during the show were losing some of their clothes. and yes, every girl had a different fruit on her nipples…)
(so you know why Berlusconi’s royal orgies don’t really impress italian people grown up with that stuff, btw)
This show was one of the earliest examples of a “whacky private station game show” in Germany, IIRC – not understanding the rules actually became sort of a meme among old people like me. Then again, nobody pretended to be following the score.
Hasslehoff is looking weird these days.
What fruits are they known as?
I know that when I was in Italy they had straight up topless foxy boxing on TV. And the most hilarious phone sex ads I have ever seen, set to “Woman” by John Lennon.
Germany has weird phone-sex ads too! By which I mean, phone-sex ads more explicit than softcore porn.
No, but now I want to!
P.S. I lived in Italy for an embarassing amount of time before realizing that “tutti frutti” is the Italian phrase for “all fruits,” and is not just some silly rhyme that a marketing company made up to sell ice cream.
Also P.S. I was trying to reply to Kate, not myself. That didn’t work out so well. Then I held on to my butt.
I agree but Italian TV is probably the best of the best. Their American Idol/X Factor is pretty amazing. The worst people come up and play instruments/sing and the host NEVER stops smiling and the audience always claps. ALWAYS – no matter what. And most performances are horrendous. Still, they say “bene” and it’s just as if the world’s crappiest singer belted it out better than Mariah or Whitney (when she had a voice). They also have tremendous celebrity appearances like Gloria Gaynor who usually just look lost and confused and on loads of hallucinogens.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/MTV_Senseless
When I was in France they had some insane game show where a contestant had to pull gold out of the basement of a castle in Normandy or somewhere else with insane tides. And as they went through CRAZY obstacles, the castle would flood with the tides, so half the stuff they had to do was under water. Or they quit.
Family pictures must be so awkward for her family.
These are the kind of debts you have to pay when you are Peter Dinklage.
And of course he always pays his debts.
A Lannister always splays and rests
Sorry that was the worst. ShoulderShrug.gif
Eh, still better than Leno.
but did she get any good shots?
Take a peak at the weird South Korean sitcoms they’re constantly adding to Hulu. Flower Boy Ramen Shop is my personal fave.
:36 over and over and over…
i prefer to just stare at the piano player smiling and waving at peter dinklage for some reason. “hi!”
Hubba hubba hubba, etc.
Now if THIS scene was in “Somewhere’ I would have loved that movie. Plus Peter Dinklage would have done a much better job at pretending to be a huge movie star than Stephen Dorff, who did a good job of looking like a gas station attendent.
It kills me, because this is what Whitney COULD HAVE been
Dinklage looks so into it!
Wait- Peter Dinklage was in that video?
Still makes more sense than War Horse.