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The 2012 Sundance Film Festival has been going on in Park City, Utah since January 19 and will continue until January 29th, and, my goodness, that is SO MANY DAYS! I was already envious of all the celebrities who get to go and watch movies, and collect coats upon coats and boots upon boots and Stella Artois upon Stella Artois at gifting suites, and drink champagne all day, and have brunch for every meal with James Murphy DJing in every room, and have people compliment them all the time when I thought it went on for FIVE days. TEN DAYS?! That seems slightly excessive. Not super excessive since it does seem mostly about the art of it all, but certainly SLIGHTLY excessive, just kidding. The thing I’m most envious of when it comes to Sundance, though, is the opportunity to rub elbows with red hot celebs. Duuuuuuh. Park City is just littered with them this time of year and I’m sure, right as we speak, they’re all rubbing each others’ elbows, getting to know each other, making friends, trading clothes and industry secrets, hugging, complimenting each other, and I WANT IN WITH THAT! Sadly, though, I don’t think you or I will ever be in with that. Not to assume anything about you. Or about where the future could take either of us, only God knows. But let’s just say, I don’t think I’ll ever be in with that and odds are you won’t either. BUT A GIRLS CAN DREAM, CAN’T THEYS? So please, after the jump, vote in our poll about which red hot celeb you’d want to hang out with the most during your imaginary stay @ Sundance. Just as fun as the real thing.
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The correct answer is making out with Liz Caplan why even bother with a poll dummies.
Seriously, what a stupid poll. It’s like asking what your favourite Ice Cream flavour is, and one of the choices is Mint Chocolate chip, and the other 12 choices are Garbage flavours. Fuck.
it’s like “hey I have this difficult decision for you to make. Would you like to do this obviously fine thing, like for example make out with Liz Caplan, or alternatively, 12 or 13 variations on being bitten in the groin by a wolverine?”
Go back to poll school, Gabe.
Should Gabe go back to poll school?
[ ] Yes
[ ] No
[ ] Herman Cain
FT, I see you graduated from Arizona online poll university too.
If you had the choice between being the top scientist in your field and having mad cow disease, which one would you pick?
Well of course I would choose to be the top scientist in my field.
Goldblum?
Astrophysicist Doctor Ken Waller.
Oh good I was worried you’d choose mad cow.
Marry: Glasses of Stella Artois
Fuck: Kirsten Dunst almost kissing Lizzy Caplan
Kill: Paris Hilton and LMFAO
LMFAO is David Cross’ younger brother, LMFAO Cross.
New poll: How many of those glasses of Stella Artois would you have to “marry” before Paris Hilton and LMFAO move up one spot on your list?
Thanks but I’ll just be hanging out with Jason Mraz’s snowboard and a tall glass of low self-esteem.
LMFAO shouldn’t be on this list. They’re not their to hang out, they’re being paid to be in the house and make sure that everybody is just having a good time.
I enjoy Stella on tap. And they have the nice glasses!
Is it just me, or does “Lil Jon and The Dingo” sound like the greatest caper comedy of our time? I would watch the hell out of a movie about those two traipsing around the country side, solving mysteries and fighting crime. Make it so, Sundance.
photoshopped KangarooJack.jpg
It wouldn’t be able to top this:
It’s a spider boner miracle!
ALL spider boners are spider boner miracles.
Spike, put down the 3DS. You’re going to miss the bus and be late for school again.
where’s Will.I.am?
Umm, I didn’t see an option there for hanging out with me. Which I only mention because I’ll be skiing in Park City this weekend, suckers!
Also, probably the L’Oreal girls, because I’m a dude and I’m awful.
Keep staying true to yourself, whoever voted for Snowboarding Jason Mraz.
Awww. Kerr Smith still think he’s relevant.
Sundance is actually very doable if you wait until the second week, when the celebrities are mostly gone. The monsters who feel comfortable enough as virtual friends could chip in for a sweet ski chalet, pool their ticket lottery entries to get as many films as they can, import some real beer (because the beer there sucks) and have a blast. And invite me too since I just planned it all out for you. And you’ll still meet some C-list stars and indie nobodies but that’s kinda beside the point.
Sounds like the plot of next year’s Grand Jury Prize winner!!
On the real, I would probably be stuck in a ski-lift. Probably clinging to a stopped T-lift, deathly afraid to get off.
Lol tha fvck? i’m surprised no one wants to hang out with tommy lee. i would because i’m sure the muthafvkca would have coke or some shit hahah.
Were the “Late Night Lounge” furnishings made by a freshman college theatre scene design class? I mean, plywood benches? WTF?
Who will have the most illegal drugs? The L’Oreal gift giving ladies right?
Yo, Ashton, big fan — oh, sorry man.
I swear Michael Cera was wearing the exact same jacket and DEFINITELY that red hat at LAX two Christmases ago.
Spike Lee playing Nintendo 3DS all the way. Also, I’m laughing way too hard at all of this right now.
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I already drank a Stella Artois.
You’re doing #humblebrag wrong
LMFAO for the win! And also beer. I can have both, right?